


Don’t Give Star Wars Characters A Phone

by ReyAndor19



Series: The Adventures Of Girlsquad [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Armitage Hux Has Feelings, Armitage Hux Lives, Armitage Hux Plays Candy Crush, Astromech Droids (Star Wars), Awesome Phasma, Babysitting, Ben Solo Lives, Birthday, Birthday Party, Book 3: Mockingjay, Book/Movie 1: Divergent, Book/Movie 1: The Hunger Games, Book/Movie 2: Catching Fire, But also real fighting, But everyone’s managing to still have fun, Candy Crush, Canto Bight, Cats, Chatting & Messaging, Closets, Cooking, Crack, Detectives, Disney References, Divergent Factions, Double Dating, Drowning, Everyone acting like crazy children, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fruit, Gingerrose - Freeform, Glitter, Glitter Fighting, Gwen Phasma Is A Disney Princess, Hacking, Harry Potter - Freeform, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I love all these characters so much, I’m going to murder Pryde, I’m sorry Poe, Jannah can’t swim, Kaydel is a meme lord, Kitchen Robbery, Lonely Phasma, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Memes, Millennium Falcon - Freeform, Millicent the cat - Freeform, Movie Night, Movie: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Multi, Nimi is a lifeguard now, No one actually drowns though don’t worry, Not Canon Compliant, Nutella, Orbaks, PORGS!!!!, Pigs, Pirates of the Caribbean References, Play Fighting, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Prison, Protective Armitage Hux, Protocol Droids, Puffer Pigs, Rey can’t swim, Reylo - Freeform, Robbery, Rose Tico Has The High Ground, Rose Tico is a fish, Secret Relationship, Snacks & Snack Food, Song: My Heart Will Go On (Céline Dion), Stormpilot, Sunsets, Surprise Party, Swimming, Takodana, The Avengers (2012) - Freeform, The First Order and Resistance are still at war, The force is female, To the vents!, WHO’S WITH ME?, Weddings, Work Contains Fan(s) or Fandom(s), book clubs, chicken fights, meilooruns, midnight snacks, porgs, rickrolling, speeder bikes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:48:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 153
Words: 57,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23895589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReyAndor19/pseuds/ReyAndor19
Summary: This is why you don’t give Star Wars characters a phone and let them text each other. There is a 99 percent chance things will get out of hand.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Dopheld Mitaka/Phasma, Kylo Ren/Rey, Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Zorii Bliss/Kaydel Ko Connix
Series: The Adventures Of Girlsquad [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1817848
Comments: 493
Kudos: 347





	1. Stormpilot

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Finn

Poe: Hi

Finn: Hi

Poe: So...

Rey: SAY IT!!!!! SAY IT!!!!!

Poe: Rey what are you doing this is a private chat.

Rose: WE’RE GETTING YOU TWO TO ADMIT YOUR FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER!!!!!

Poe: Rose wut how are you guys doing this THIS IS A PRIVATE CHAT.

Rey: She’s a mechanic, I’m a Jedi. We’re a good team.

Rose: Just like you two <3

Poe: Aren’t you guys supposed to be enjoying girls night or something?

Rey: We are. We’re enjoying this immensely :)

Rose: Finn, Poe, you guys are cool and all, but when it comes to feelings...

Rey: Not so good in the feelings department.

Rose: Well most boys aren’t. Trust me, I know from experience!

Rey: Experience? Wait...do you have a boyfriend?

Rose: Maybe.

Rey: GUYS ROSE HAS A KRIFFING BOYFRIEND!!!!!! WHAT’S HIS NAME???

Rose: We’ll discuss this later. AnYwAy...you two like each other.

Finn: no we don’t!

Rose: You told me two weeks ago when Poe was away too long on a mission.

Finn: YoU pRoMiSeD nOt To TeLl AnYoNe!!!!

Rey: And Poe, you told me yesterday.

Poe: ...do you guys talk about us behind our backs?

Rose: What do you think girls night is for?

Rey: That’s not the point. Point is, you like each other.

Poe: Rey-

Rey has left the chat

Poe: Rose-

Rose has left the chat

Finn: Did you actually say that?

Poe: Yes. You?

Finn: Yes.

Zorii: YES I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!


	2. Rose’s boyfriend

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Rose

Rey invited Zorii

Rey invited Jannah

Rey: Rose.

Rose: Wut?

Rey: You know what.

Rose: No I really don’t.

Rey: YOUR BOYFRIEND

Rose: ...

Jannah: Wait, Rose has a boyfriend?

Zorii: ROSE HAS A BOYFRIEND I TOLD YOU JANNAH!!!!!!

Zorii invited Kaydel

Zorii: KAYDEL ROSE HAS A BOYFRIEND!!!!!

Kaydel: I know.

Rey: WHAT???

Jannah: WHAT????

Zorii: ASDFGHJKL WHAT AND YOU DIDN’T TELL US?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: Yep. He’s pretty nice once you get to know him.

Rey: What’s his name?

Rose: I can’t tell you.

Jannah: What whyyyy?

Rose: Fine his name is Armitage.

Rey: Like Armitage Hux the First Order general?

Rose: That’s oddly specific. Yes.

Kaydel: But he’s a nice guy! He’s the spy!

Zorii: WHAT

Jannah: WHAT

Rey: I know.

Rose: what? How? No one else knows!

Rey: Someone told me.

Jannah: Guys I think she’s blushing.

Zorii: Rose?

Jannah: Rey is definitely blushing!!!

Rey: No I’m not!

Jannah: I can see you, you’re sitting in the corner of the mess hall. And you’re blushing.

Zorii: Exposed!!

Jannah: Wait...who told you?

Rey: Someone.

Jannah: Guys I don’t think Rose is the only one with a boyfriend.

Kaydel: REY??

Rey: Guys Jedi can’t marry. Or fall in love.

Kaydel: Leia.

Rose: Anakin Skywalker.

Zorii: She’s got a boyfriend.

Rose: What’s his name???

Kaydel: Wait don’t say it yet!

Kaydel invited Phasma

Kaydel: Okay now.

Phasma: What is this?

Jannah: Rose told us her secret boyfriend’s name.

Zorii: And now Rey’s gonna tell us hers.

Rey: No she isn’t because she doesn’t have a boyfriend.

Kaydel: YES YOU DO

Jannah: She’s blushing even harder now guys.

Rey: Shut up Jannah!

Jannah: Aww, she left the mess hall, I can’t see her any more.

Phasma: You guys are insane but the FO is so boring and i have nothing to do so I’ll stay.

Kaydel: Yay! Besties!

Zorii: I think we’re all learning some startling things about each other today...

Rose: REY TELL USSSSSSS

Rey: I don’t have a boyfriend.

Rose: I told you all about Arm.

Jannah: Aww...she calls him Arm! <3

Phasma: Arm short for Armitage?

Rose: Yes

Phasma: Oh so that’s who he was talking to the other night.

Rose: You heard? Don’t tell anyone PLEASE!!

Phasma: No problem, it’s about time that guy found a friend.

Kaydel: Guys, Rey still hasn’t told us.

Zorii: Tell us or I’m stealing the keys to the  Falcon again.

Jannah: Again? Wow Zorii...

Zorii: I’m a criminal, okay?

Rose: TELL US!

Phasma: TELL US!!!

Kaydel: TELL US!!!

Zorii: TELL US!!!

Jannah: TELL US!!!

Rey: ...Kylo Ren.

Rey has left the chat

Phasma: Ya know, I kinda saw that one coming.

Rose: Can someone come help me, Zorii just passed out.


	3. Hacking

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Rey

Zorii: WHAT???

Rey: We aren’t talking about this.

Zorii: Yes we are.

Kaydel: Leave her alone Zorii, you used to be in love with Poe.

Zorii: No I wasn’t- hey wait how did you get here?

Kaydel: Rose taught me how to hack onto these things.

Zorii: This is getting out of hand. Now there are two of them!

Rey: Well I’ll just leave you two to have a nice little chat...

Rey has left the chat

Zorii invited Rey

Zorii: You’re not getting off that easily. Details girl! When did this even start?

Kaydel: Wait, the other girls should see this...

Rey: NO THEY REALLY DON’T NEED TO.

Kaydel: Okay, np.

Zorii: Explain.

Rey: There’s nothing to explain.

Zorii: Actually, there is a  _ lot  _ to explain.

Rey: No there isn’t. Go bother Poe and Finn.

Zorii: I can’t they’re on a date and Rose made me promise not to interrupt.

Rey: That actually worked?! They’re on a date!?

Kaydel: Rey is sitting on the ramp to the  Falcon and she just started dancing.

Rey: Shut up Kaydel.

Zorii: What is Kaydel even doing here?

Kaydel: I’m also bored now that we can’t bother Finn and Poe.

Rey: Let’s hack onto Rose’s chat with her boyfriend.

Zorii: xDD YES!!!

Rey: Let’s meet in my room in five minutes. Invite the other girls if u want.

Kaydel: Can Phasma come?

Rey: As long as she’s okay with the possibility Rose’s boyfriend kills her.

Zorii: Is Rose going to kill us?

Rey: Probably. See you soon!


	4. Date Crashing

Rose: You haven’t told anyone, right?

Arm: Of course.

Rose: I did tell a few people yesterday. But they won’t tell anyone, I promise. Also, Phasma knows.

Arm: WHAT? HOW?

Rose: She walked by while we were chatting a few days ago.

Arm: She’s not going to tell anyone, right?

Rose: No, she’s actually glad. Apparently there’s absolutely no drama where u are.

Arm: She’s correct there. I wish I could come see you...

Rose: You can’t leave, your’e a spy.

Arm: I know I just miss you.

Rose: <3 <3 <3 There’s a mission invading the First Order next week. I’m going to try to join the team.

Arm: Which ship?

Rose: Silencer. See u there?

Arm: I can try.

Rose: <333

Rey: Can we come to the wedding?

Zorii: I think they’re already married.

Rey: Kaydel?

Kaydel: Idk if they are I wasn’t invited :(

Rose: GUYS WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!?!?!

Rey: What does it look like?

Arm: ...?

Rey: Oh hi Armitage, can u tell Kylo I said hi?

Arm: Hi Rey, no problem?

Kaydel: You two know each other?

Rey: No.

Arm: No. I have no clue what is happening.

Zorii: Hi! So do you prefer Armitage or Arm?

Arm: Armitage

Rey invited Phasma

Phasma: Oh hey guys so this is the conversation we were trying to hack?

Kaydel: Yeah.

Arm: Captain Phasma?

Phasma: Hi. 

Rose: THIS IS A PRIVATE CHAT

Rey: Sorry, you said we couldn’t bother Poe and Finn since they’re on a date.

Zorii: There’s not much you can do at the base.

Rose: how do u kick people off this thing?

Arm: One sec...

Armremoved Kaydel from chat

Arm removed Zorii from chat

Arm removed Phasma from chat

Arm removed Rey from chat

Rose: So, back to the conversation?

Jannah: Nope, I’m still here, I’ve just been watching this whole thing! :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Revenge of the 5th!!


	5. Revenge

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Jannah

Rose invited Kaydel

Kaydel: Hi bestie!

Rose: Hi! <3

Jannah: I mean I’m here too but okay.

Rose: Sry Jannah. We’re all besties!

Kaydel: Yass!! Rebel besties!!

Jannah: <333

Rose: But serious guys i need ur help.

Jannah: What is it commander Rose? *salutes*

Kaydel: xDDD

Rose: I need your help to get back at Rey.

Jannah: Ooh, I’m in!

Kaydel: What’re we doing this time... *evil laugh*

Jannah: She’s talking to her boyfriend, let’s interrupt!

Rose: didn’t she say Jedi can’t fall in love...?

Kaydel: Yes! Let’s just scream about that!!!

Jannah: Sounds like a plan!

Rose: Yay Rebel besties!


	6. “Political” Meetings

Rey: I can take the  Falcon .

Ben: We’re nearby Lah’mu right now. I’ve heard it’s a peaceful planet.

Rey: We’re pretty far away from Lah’mu...

Ben: There’s a beach.

Rey: Not fair :)

Ben: You’d have to leave earlier though. Around mealtime where you are.

Rey: I’ll see you there <333

Ben: So Armitage told me you said hi. He seemed very angry.

Rey: Isn’t he always?

Ben: xD true, true. So what did you do this time?

Rey: It wasn’t all me!

Ben: mhmm.

Rey: We crashed his date.

Ben: He has a girlfriend?

Rey: Her name is Rose Tico and she probably hates me right now.

Ben: Probably?

Rey: I’ve been keeping a safe distance so she doesn’t murder me.

Rose: YOU BETTER SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN TONIGHT!!!!!!!

Ben: What.

Rey: Oh no...

Rose: I THOUGHT JEDI COULDN’T GET MARRIED HUH

Kaydel: Rose please calm down.

Ben: You said this was a private chat!

Rey: It is, but I taught Rose how to hack private servers.

Jannah: I think we all know how to do it by now.

Kaydel: Except for Finn and Poe. They’re on another date right now.

Rose: YOU EXPLICITLY SAID JEDI COULDN’T GET MARRIED

Rey: Rose we’re not married.

Jannah: Can I come to the wedding then?

Rey: Kaydel is Rose okay?

Kaydel: I honestly don’t know but she’s literally jabbing at the screen right now. It’s quite frightening.

Ben: So anyway, I’ll see you tonight?

Rey: Yeah, most likely. If not, tomorrow.

Jannah: Aww, they’re gonna meet up at Lah’mu. Beautiful place for a tryst. I was there once.

Ben: It’s not a tryst, it’s an important political meeting.

Rey: We’re trying to work on finding a way to get the First Order and the Resistance to cooperate. Hopefully even call a truce.

Phasma: Don’t listen to them guys, I just finished reading through the whole conversation. 99 percent of it is mushy stuff, the other one percent is them planning to meet in person and say more mushy stuff.

Ben: Phasma you’re fired.


	7. Finn and Rose (not in a tree)

Finn has started a chat room

Finn invited Rose

Finn: Where have u been? I haven’t seen you all week.

Rose: That’s because this is the third day of the week, and the first two you and Poe were always out on a date when we were free.

Rose: You’re welcome, by the way.

Finn: Oh yeah, thanks. But what have you been up to?

Rose: We crashed Rey’s date after she crashed mine.

Finn: Rey’s got a boyfriend?

Rose: Yeah. He’s nice.

Finn: Got a name?

Rose: I didn’t see.

Finn: Oh. You’ve got a boyfriend?

Rose: Yes.

Finn: Name?

Rose: Secret

Finn: Alright. Well...just wanted to see what you were up to.

Rose: Just boring mechanic stuff, etc etc. You?

Finn: Like you said, I’ve been hanging out with Poe in my free time. After you guys left we started talking...and we realized that we both liked each other, we were just keeping it a secret!

Rose: xD boys

Finn: So you’re hanging out with Jannah now?

Rose: Actually we have a sort of group. Kaydel, Jannah, Rey, and Zorii. And me.

Finn: Fun. Quick question though- have you seen Rey lately? I need her to help me fix something. And I’ve looked all over base.

Rose: uhh...she’s probably in her room.

Finn: I knocked, she didn’t answer.

Rose: She’s probably sleeping? She said she didn’t feel well, and skipped dinner to rest.

Finn: Rey skipped a meal? I hope she’s okay...

Rose: Most likely tired. All that training’s gotta wear a girl out, ya know?

Finn: Yeah. Well, thanks for helping Poe and I. Even if you did hack our chat room.

Rose: Anytime hehehe

Finn: Please don’t.


	8. Fanboys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now, for the chapter some of you have been waiting for...  
> Kylo and Hux!  
> The Hunger Games Trilogy by Suzanne Collins is mentioned, but for those who haven’t read the series, there will be no big spoilers. Enjoy!

Hux has started a chat

Hux invited Kylo

Hux: So...

Kylo: So...

Hux: You’re dating THE LAST JEDI

Kylo: You’re dating THE PERSON WHO BIT YOUR HAND

Hux: We could do this all day.

Kylo: Good point. So really?

Hux: Yes, you?

Kylo: Yes.

Hux: So...

Kylo: Can we stop fighting?

Hux: Yea, it does get tiring.

Kylo: Agreed! So do you guys usually meet up in person?

Hux: Sometimes. Lah’mu is a really peaceful planet, it’s pretty sparsely populated.

Kylo: Same!

Hux: So we’re friends now?

Kylo: I mean if u want.

Hux: Yes, definitely.

Kylo: Agreed. So...like any movies? Books?

Hux: Have you seen The Hunger Games?

Kylo: That’s the one with all the kids in an arena?

Hux: Yes, and the 13 Districts.

Kylo: Aren’t there only 12?

Hux: Wait. Have you seen Mockingjay?

Kylo: I read and watched The Hunger Games.

Hux: There’s two more!!

Kylo: WHY DIDN’T I KNOW THIS!?!?!?!

Hux: I own all the movies + books. You NEED to come over and watch the rest of the movies. I’ll lend you the books first- they’re wayyy better.

Kylo: I can’t believe there’s more!!!!!! What’s the second one?

Hux: Catching Fire, I’m grabbing it now. You have to get started RIGHT NOW.

Kylo: Yesss more Everthorne!!

Hux: HoW dArE yOu!?!?!

Hux: EvErLaRk Is LiFe

Kylo: No way, she and Gale have so much chemistry.

Hux: Eww that’s like...

Kylo: You and Rose getting together?

Hux: Cheap move.

Kylo: :) No spoilers though

Hux: None, but don’t read Mockingjay in public because it makes you cry. I speak from experience  😅


	9. I’m Hungry

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Zorii

Jannah invited Rey

Jannah invited Rose

Jannah invited Kaydel

Jannah invited Phasma

Jannah: I’m hungry.

Rey: Jannah it’s 2 in the morning.

Rose: Whyyyy Jannah? I was having the best dream...

Zorii: Well I’m wide awake.

Kaydel: That’s cause you have night guard duty. The rest of us are sleeping.

Phasma: Is this some sort of rebel humor because I spent most of my night cleaning up some stormtrooper prank, and I fell asleep ten minutes ago.

Rey: Sorry Phasma, we can take you off this.

Phasma: Thank you.

Rey removed Phasma

Jannah: I’m hungry.

Kaydel: You’ve mentioned this.

Zorii: Guys let’s raid the kitchen.

Rose: Zorii you’re out of your mind. It’s 2 in the morning and you’re supposed to be on night watch.

Zorii: What, afraid one of the porgs from the  Falcon is gonna steal our weapons? Let’s  _ do _ something.

Rey: Well, I’m up.

Kaydel: I guess I am too.

Rose: Nooo don’t pressure me into this guysss

Zorii: Not a morning person?

Rose: This isn’t even morningggg

Rey: Stop complaining. Jannah’s hungry. Let’s break into the kitchen. I’ll see you guys in...five minutes.

Zorii: Yeah! That’s the spirit!

Kaydel: One sec, I gotta brush my hair. It looks like a porg tried to nest in it.

Rey: xDDD A porg tried to do that to Ben once

Kaydel: I dropped my brush cause i laughed so hard that actually happened?!?!?

Rey: Saw it with my own two eyes :)

Rose: well that woke me up

Jannah: I’m hungry.


	10. Waiting

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Rey

Zorii invited Rose

Zorii invited Kaydel

Zorii invited Jannah

Zorii: Okay, where are you guys?

Zorii: Holy-

Rey: Language Zorii.

Zorii: DON’T SNEAK UP ON ME AT TWO IN THE MORNING THEN!!!!

Rose: xDD she seriously snuck up on you?

Zorii: YES. SHE SNUCK UP BEHIND ME, GRABBED MY SHOULDERS, AND SAID I WAS ARRESTED!!!!! 

Kaydel: I dropped my brush laughing again lol

Zorii: IT’S NOT FUNNY!!! YOU DON’T DO THAT!!!! ESPECIALLY BEFORE WE’RE ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING MOST LIKELY ILLEGAL!!!!!

Rey: Kaydel ur still brushing ur hair?

Kaydel: It takes a little while!

Rey: Bring the brush with you and I’ll do it.

Zorii: Guys I think Rose fell back asleep.

Rose: no I’m here. and hating all of you.

Jannah: I’m here.

Rey: I see you.

Jannah: Just wanted to make sure I wasn’t scaring anyone.

Kaydel: Guys I’m coming.

Rose: I don’t want to comeeee

Zorii: Rose stop complaining.

Rey: Kaydel is that u?

Kaydel: Yeah hi.

Zorii: We’re just waiting on Rose.

Rey: RoSe GeT dOwN hErE bEfOrE wE cOmE gEt YoU

Rose: I’m coming, I’m coming. Almost there.

Kaydel: Rose we’re going to eat all the food before you get here.

Rose: Guys I’m right in front of you.

Zorii: YASS! LET’S GET THIS ROBBERY GOING!!!!!


	11. Snacks 4 All

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you read the chapter, I just want to thank everyone for all the support this has been getting. It’s currently at 88 kudos, which is wayyyy more than I ever expected, so thank you all so much for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Rey

Jannah invited Zorii

Jannah invited Kaydel

Jannah named chat room  ** Snacks 4 All **

Rey: Wait what about Rose?

Jannah: She’s just gonna complain the whole time.

Zorii invited Rose

Zorii: Okay, let’s do this. Rose, you’re lookout. Just warn us if anyone’s coming, which isn’t likely. Maybe you can get some rest while you wait.

Rose: Doesn’t matter, you guys woke me up.

Jannah: Can anyone here pick a lock?

Zorii: Me.

Rey: Yeah I can.

Jannah: Ahhh decisions who do I choose.

Rey: xD let Zorii I’m not that good.

Jannah: Okay Zorii can u do it then?

Zorii: Course. I’m a thief.

Rey: I can carry the food back.

Jannah: We all can.

Zorii: hey has anyone heard from Kaydel?

Rey: GUYS

Jannah: What?

Rey: WE LOST KAYDEL SHE WAS STANDING NEXT TO ME A MINUTE AGO AND NOW SHE’S GONE

Rose: You lost Kaydel?!?!?!?

Kaydel: Guys I found a porg!

Zorii: Wut?

Kaydel: No I seriously found a porg. I’m over in the corner.

Rey: Oh wow she actually found a porg.

Rose: Why is there a porg in the mess hall?

Rey: idk it’s just sitting here. Probably found its way from the  Falcon .

Kaydel: Guys its so CUTE!!!!!

Zorii: Cute?!?! It just bit me!!

Rose: xD there are few things less embarrassing than getting bitten by a porg.

Rey: Try having your lightsaber stolen.

Rose: Wow. xDDDD

Jannah: Guys I found the food.

Zorii: We’re coming!

Kaydel: Can I bring the porg?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a porg actually did steal her lightsaber: if you haven’t watched Porg Problems, definitely add that to your watchlist- it’s basically two minutes of porgs causing mayhem and it’s adorable 🖤


	12. Snacks 4 All (continued)

Rose: You guys coming?

Rey: Yeah, we’re trying to carry all the snacks.

Zorii: And Kaydel insisted on bringing the porg with us.

Kaydel: I wanna take it back to the  Falcon .

Zorii: Could a falcon eat a porg?

Kaydel: ZORII!!!!!!!!!!

Jannah: xDDD Kaydel just started smacking Zorii, but at the same time she’s trying to balance her snacks on the other arm.

Rey: and the porg is sitting on her head.

Rose: xDDD guys you’re making me laugh out loud! Not cool!

Rey: We’re all in the kitchen right now laughing our heads off its fine.

Zorii: I WON!!!!!!

Jannah: Kaydel dropped a bag and slipped on it.

Rey: And somehow the porg is still on her head.

Rose:  🤣 can I come back there.

Rey: Please do you really need to see this.

Jannah: Stop texting while your hands are full.

Rey: So are yours.

Jannah: Rose you need to see this.

Rey: I know we’re texting instead of talking in an attempt to be quiet and not alert everyone in the base to our plan...

Rey: But we’re louder than a herd of tusken raiders.

Rose: I’m here, I’m h-

Rose: Oh. WhAt HaPpEnEd HeRe!?!?!?!?

Rey: ...to be completely honest, I have no idea.


	13. Back to Bed

Rose: Okay you guys, that was fun and all, but never wake me up at 2 in the morning again.

Jannah: No problem  👍

Kaydel: Guys I think a good 90 percent of this is expired.

Rey: *shrugs*

Zorii: Jannah was hungry. We got food. Never said it had to be safe to eat food.

Rose: Alright you guys stop texting. I’m going to sleep  😴

Kaydel: Agreed. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.

Jannah: You do realize that’s only a few hours from now?

Kaydel: Leave me alone I wanna sleep.

Kaydel: As does the porg.

Rey: You brought the porg with you.

Zorii: That thing is a devil!! It tried to BITE me!!!!!

Rey:  🤣 Zorii it’s like five inches tall, has the tiniest teeth in the world, and is absolutely adorable. No one will believe you if you call it a devil.

Zorii: I DON’T CARE IT’S A KRIFFING MURDERER!!!!!!!!!

Rey: I’m actually worried for Zorii’s mental health right now. I think you need to get some sleep girl.

Zorii: I AM COMPLETELY FINE, IT’S THAT PORG THAT ISN’T!!!!!!

Rey: Zorii, come on, it’s like 3 in the morning. Just sleep for a few hours. Plz.

Zorii: REY YOU’RE NOT MY MOM

Rey: Well someone has to make sure you get some sleep, and if that makes me your mom then I’m fine with that. You’ve been up all night, and you’re obviously still upset from earlier when Kaydel was slapping you...

Zorii: I AM NOT UPSET FROM EARLIER

Rey: Jannah plz help.

Jannah: Oh no. I’m not a part of this conversation. You two have fun!


	14. Rumors

Finn has started a chat room

Finn invited Rey

Finn: xDDD I just heard the craziest rumor!

Rey: Ooh, what?

Finn: You’ll never believe someone actually thought of this!

Rey: Tell me plz  🥺

Finn: Someone said that you and Kylo Ren are friends!!!  🤣

Rey: ...Really? Uh, who told you?

Finn: I heard it from Poe, who heard it from D’Acy, who heard it from some guy in the mess hall, who heard it from a droid repair guy. It’s been traveling all over base!

Rey: Yeah, that’s hilarious.

Finn: What will people come up with next...I mean really, how could you guys ever be friends??? After the whole thing with Han???

Rey: ...yeah, that was terrible. I can’t see us ever being friends. Do you know who started the rumor?

Finn: No clue- one of the pilots probably, they’re always spreading rumors. I have to say, they’ve really outdone themselves this time.

Finn: I mean who would ever believe that???

Rey: Definitely...hey Rose just asked me if I want to go grab lunch with her. See ya!

Rey has left the chat

Finn: But...Rose just had lunch with Poe and I a few minutes ago?


	15. Girlsquad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus chapter!!!!  
> Don’t Give Star Wars Characters A Phone has reached 100 kudos, so I’m posting a bonus chapter today. A huge thanks to everyone for all the kudos and comments, this is so much fun to write. Just want to thank everyone for reading, I really hope you’re all enjoying, and may the force be with you!

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Rose

Rey invited Jannah

Rey invited Phasma

Rey invited Kaydel

Rey: Guys guys guys!!! I have an idea!!!

Rose: Wait, what about Zorii? You forgot to add her.

Rey: ...she was a bit worked up last night. 

Jannah: That’s an understatement...

Rose invited Zorii

Kaydel: No, she’s gonna start screaming about the porg again...

Rey: Hi Zorii.

Zorii: Hi.

Rey: Are you gonna start screaming again?

Zorii: No.

Phasma: So what’s your idea?

Rey: We should have a name!!!

Kaydel: Wut?

Rose: We have names. Mine is Rose. Yours is Rey.

Rey: Yes, but we should name our group!!!

Jannah: Like a squad name or something?

Rey: Yea, like that.

Zorii: I’m in! As long as Kaydel keeps that porg away from me...

Kaydel: If I train it not to bite you will you stop screaming about it?

Zorii: ...yes.

Rose: I’ll join!

Phasma: What should we name ourselves?

Jannah: Daugthers of the Rebellion?

Kaydel: What about Phasma?

Jannah: ooh sry.

Phasma: np  👍

Phasma: Girlsquad?

Rose: what?

Phasma: idk. We’re a squad of girls. So Girlsquad.

Zorii: I like it.

Rey: It doesn’t leave any of us out.

Jannah: #squadgoals

Rose: #squad ~~goals~~ girls

Kaydel: Can the porg be our mascot?

Zorii: NO

Kaydel:  🥺

Zorii: That’s cheating! Kaydel’s giving me puppy eyes!

Kaydel: Heheheheheh

Phasma: How is that cheating tho?

Zorii: She’s really good at it!!!!!

Phasma: xDD

Rey: Alright, all in favor of naming ourselves Girlsquad and making our mascot Kaydel’s porg say ‘I’

Rose: I

Phasma: I, as long as I’m included. This better not be just rebel stuff!

Rey: It won’t be.

Zorii: I still don’t agree with the porg mascot...but I

Kaydel: I

Jannah: jklmnop


	16. History Lessons

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Girlsquad

Rey: I was cleaning out the Falcon, and I found some chats between Leia, Han, and Luke!

Rose: Really?

Jannah: Cool! Can we see?

Zorii: Woah

Rey: Yeah, I can send it...

_Luke has started a chat room_

_Luke invited Leia_

_Luke invited Han_

_Leia: I love you._

_Han: I know._

_Luke: Oh get a room._

_Han: Hey who forgot Chewie!?!?!?!_

_Luke invited Chewbacca_

_Chewbacca: rrrrrrggh rrrrrrh ggrrh_

_Han: Exactly, thank you._

_Luke: google translate doesn’t have Shriiwook as an option, can someone explain what he said?_

_Han: He said just because you can’t get married doesn’t mean we can’t._

_Luke has removed Chewbacca from the chat room_

_Leia invited Chewbacca_

_Chewbacca: RRRGGGGHHHHH_

_Luke: Han. Translate._

_Leia: He said if you kick him off again he’ll rip your arms out._

_Luke: I thought you didn’t speak Shriiwook?_

_Leia: Yes, but he says it to you so often I’ve learned to understand._

_Luke: No he doesn’t!!_

_Leia: Yes he does, Han just pretends he says something else._

_Chewbacca: rrghgh_

_Han: He says you two are the ones acting like a married couple._

_Chewbacca: rghh rrrrgh rffh_

_Han: He says you’re a cute pair, and he better be invited to the wedding._

_Luke has left the chat_

_Leia has left the chat_

_Chewbacca: rrrf rrrgh_

_Han: He says you guys are noobs because you rage quit._

Kaydel: xDDD they’re worse than us!!

Phasma: I didn’t know that was physically possible.

Rose: Can u find more?

Rey: Yea, but it might take a while. The Falcon’s full of a lot of old stuff!

Jannah: But...I thought Luke and Leia were related???

Rose: *facepalms*

Phasma: *facepalms*

Zorii: *facepalms*


	17. Invitation

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Rey

Rose: So...we had a question for you.

Rey: Who’s we?

Rose: Arm and I.

Rey: Yea?

Rose: We were wondering if you guys wanted to go on a double date.

Rose: We found this cantina that has really good blue milk ice cream.

Rose: And we meet there occasionally.

Rose: I was wondering if u wanted to come.

Rose: As, like, a double date, not just u being a third wheel or anything.

Rose: Are u even reading these?

Rey: Yes but I just want to make sure Zorii isn’t hacking this.

Rey: Should we invite Poe and Finn?

Rose: No they’re annoying.

Rey: Agreed. And I think Poe would probably try to kill everyone...

Rose: That too, yes. One of the reasons I’ve only told you girls.

Rey: Well we also made you.

Rose: I was gonna invite u to the wedding, promise.

Rey: <333 thank you

Rose: So you’ll try to make it?

Rey: Yeah, let’s get on a group chat together and discuss a good time.

Rose:  👍

Phasma: Aww, you guys are going on a double date!!! How cute  🖤


	18. Book Nerds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Hunger Games discussions, but they’re just arguing about ships currently, so no spoilers 👍

Kylo has started a chat room

Kylo invited Hux

Kylo: Finished Catching Fire

Hux: I hate the ending of that book

Kylo: Yass how could you Suzanne Collins???

Hux: And Peeta....

Kylo: Idk I really don’t like Peeta

Hux: Still, he’s just a cinnamon roll he doesn’t deserve any of this  😭

Kylo: Yea but he just steals Gale’s gf

Kylo: And she doesn’t even like Peeta.

Hux: Katniss was never Gale’s gf and she doesn’t  like Peeta she  loves him.

Rose: Hmm. I honestly shipped Peeta and Gale.

Rey: Why does Katniss need to have a boyfriend anyway!?!?! #SingleKatniss

Hux: What the- why are you guys always hacking us!?!?!?!

Rose: I didn’t know you guys read HG!

Kylo: Same here. #Everthorne

Rose: What’s the pairing name for Gale and Peeta cause I ship them HARD

Rey: WHY

Rose: It’s adorable

Hux: Next thing we know she’ll be shipping Prim and Katniss.

Rey: *blushes*

Hux: Wait what?

Kylo: No...you’re kidding

Rey: *blushes harder*

Kylo: SERIOUS???

Rey: Only a little

Rose: Oh my god

Rose: Well

Rose: That just happened

Rey: I prefer #SingleKatniss

Hux: What about Katniss/Madge? I did see that once...

Kylo: Where has this conversation gone???

Rey: Oh come on, your mom kissed your uncle!!!

Kylo: Yes and your grandfather killed millions of people.

Hux: We could do this all day, couldn’t we?

Rose: My family’s pretty normal actually.

Hux: Yes. Nobody bully Rose.

Rose: Thank you Arm  🖤 but I can fight my own battles

Rey: I’m just saying, I’m allowed to ship Katniss and Prim why is that so wrong  😭

Rey: Also, Everlark, really Hux? Bo-ring!

Kylo: Thank you  🖤

Rey:  😘

Rose: Alright enough fluff you two. 

Hux: How about we all agree to ship and let ship?

Rose: Yes. For now...


	19. Name Changer

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: Guys I figured out how to change my name!

Rose: That’s an option?

Kaydel changed name to Rose is Crazy

Rose is Crazy: Hi

Rose: NOT FUNNY

Rey: xDDD how do u do it?

Jannah: Cool!

Rose is Crazy : I won’t tell.

Zorii: She’s ticklish.

Rose: LET’S GET HER GIRLS

Phasma: I’m not a part of this but keep me updated. I want to see what happens.

Rey:  👍

Rey: We’re all heading to Kaydel’s room to tickle her.

Rose: WE’RE COMING FOR YOU!!!!!!

Phasma: xD wish this kind of stuff happened in the FO

Rey: You should come have a sleepover at our base or something. Or meet up on a planet and camp out for a few days.

Rey: Oh, Zorii is currently picking the lock on Kaydel’s door.

Jannah: A LOCK CANNOT STOP US!!!!!

Zorii: WE’RE COMINGGGGGG

Rey: Rose kicked in the door. And Kaydel just shrieked so loud that it broke all our eardrums.

Phasma: xDDDD

Phasma: Rey I feel like you’re always just standing off to the side watching everyone fight and reporting it.

Rey: I just don’t want Kaydel to murder me.

Rose is Crazy: TRUCE TRUCE LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!

Jannah: Teach us.

Zorii: Or else

Rose is Crazy: fine

Rose: And change your name.

Rose is Crazy changed name to Armitage Hux

Armitage Hux: I love you Rose can we get married?

Phasma: Much better  🤣

Rose: ...


	20. Double Date

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: Guys, Rey and Rose have their date tonight. We gotta help them get ready!

Rey: What? No.

Rose: I’m fine, thanks.

Jannah: Ooh, I’ll help!!

Rey: It’s fine you guys, we’re just getting ice cream.

Zorii: ‘just ice cream’ she says. I’m in!

Kaydel: Great. Meet up in my room in five minutes. I’ll get Rose.

Jannah: I’ll get Rey

Rey: No, please don’t make a big deal out of this...

Phasma: No watching from the sidelines now, Sunshine.

Rey: SAVE ME PHASMA

Rey: SHE’S DRAGGING ME TO KAYDEL’S ROOM

Jannah: I found a nice silvery gray dress a while ago. It might fit Rey?

Phasma: Ooh, send a pic!

Jannah:  👍

Phasma: Pretty!

Rey: You’re not getting me to wear that.

Zorii: yes we are

Kaydel: Rose, I found a nice white blouse with a skirt and sweater I think you’d look good in.

Jannah: Definitely! Kaydel, where’s your brush?

Kaydel: Over by the sink.

Jannah: Zorii, I’m gonna try a braid crown for Rey’s hair. Can you help me?

Zorii: No prob

Phasma: I’m gonna tell the guys you’re getting dressed up and that they should too

Rey: WE’RE JUST GOING TO GET ICE CREAM

Zorii: Quiet child, the adults are speaking.

Rey: I have a lightsaber.

Zorii: No you don’t, Kaydel’s porg is currently chewing on it.

Kaydel: YOU GAVE IT TO THE PORG!?!?!?!? WHAT IF HE IMPALES HIMSELF????

Zorii: Added bonus.

Phasma: lmho I can’t  🤣

Phasma: I tried to tell Arm but he shut the door in my face

Phasma: Rose your boyfriend is rude.

Rose: Stop spreading lies.

Jannah: You two quit arguing. Kaydel, where did you say the blush was?

Zorii: She’s wrestling the porg.

Phasma: I’m just sitting in a hallway of a FO ship right now laughing my head off.

Phasma: How do you wrestle a porg?!?!?

Zorii: She’s trying to get the lightsaber away. But the porg is very feisty.

Jannah: I found the blush anyway.

Rey: IT’S JUST ICE CREAM!!!!!!!


	21. Spies

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Zorii

Jannah invited Kaydel

Jannah invited Phasma

Jannah: I’m so excited!!!!!!!

Zorii: I can’t believe we actually got them to dress up.

Phasma: It was fun to watch. Guess who got the guys to dress up too?

Kaydel: *squeals* REALLY!?!?!?

Phasma: You better believe it!

Jannah: Aww  🖤🖤

Zorii: Too cute  😭

Kaydel: I FOUND A WAY TO HACK INTO THE ICE CREAM SHOP’S CAMERAS!!!!

Phasma: Report every detail

Jannah: EVERY detail.

Kaydel: Rose and Rey aren’t there yet. Phasma, nice going with dressing up btw!

Phasma: :)

Kaydel: They just walked in. Aww, and they’re all attempting to introduce each other! 

Zorii: xD they all know each other already

Kaydel: oh can someone else do this?

Jannah: ???

Kaydel: PDA

Phasma:  🤣 I’m dying

Zorii: I’ll do it

Zorii: Oh, they’re just getting ice cream. They all look so cute together!!!!

Jannah:  🖤 aww

Zorii: They’re chatting. Everyone looks pretty- more PDA

Phasma: You guys won’t even say it I literally can’t xD

Zorii: Aww, Rose and Armitage are sharing an ice cream!

Zorii: Both couples are!

Kaydel: I can picture that it’s so cuteeeeee

Jannah: What’s happening now???

Zorii: PDA

Jannah: Oh just send it to me, I’ll report.

Jannah: They’re kissing and eating ice cream.

Jannah: That’s literally it.

Phasma: Well, what else are they gonna do, reveal the locations of the secret FO and Rebel bases?

Kaydel: True

Kaydel: fnajrqmdooinu3fpqvnvtopq459qnpuvacjrvioutn0pvqu

Zorii: ???

Kaydel: The porg jumped on my screen.

Jannah: Well now they’re chatting, and they all seem pretty friendly. Can’t hear what they’re saying.

Jannah: They’re all leaving...probably going for a walk or something

Phasma: Aww...darn

Kaydel: But I recorded the whole thing!

Zorii: We should show it to them!

Jannah: No, I like living.


	22. Party

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Girlsquad

Zorii removed Jannah

Zorii: Guys, Jannah’s birthday is next week. We should throw a surprise party!

Rey: Sleepover party! We could all meet up and camp out together! Phasma could come too!

Phasma: Yes!

Kaydel: Definitely, Phasma always gets left out :(

Rose: Should we invite Finn + Poe too? Not to the sleepover, just the surprise party?

Zorii: Yea, and maybe some other people from her company.

Phasma: Armitage, Kylo, and Mitaka? 

Kaydel: Mitaka?

Phasma: We’re friends.

Rey: ‘friends’ heheheh

Phasma: No seriously, we’re just friends.

Rey:  👍

Zorii: What about Takodana?

Rey: Definitely. It’s a beautiful planet. I’ve heard it’s even better at night, you can see so many stars.

Rose: Isn’t Jannah from Kef Bir? Maybe we should go there?

Kaydel: We talked. She doesn’t really like thinking or talking about her time as a stormtrooper.

Rose: sry

Kaydel: It’s fine

Phasma: Takodana sounds nice

Zorii: Alright, great! We have a rough guest list, and a planet to meet up at.

Rose: I can do decorations!

Kaydel: Can I be in charge of food?

Phasma: I’ll help!

Rey: I can write invitations + deliver them.

Zorii: I’ll help Rose w/ decor?

Rose: yees

Phasma: Fun! This should be an interesting party!


	23. Streamers

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Birthday Planners

Kaydel: Guys...the porg got into the streamers.

Rose: NOOOOO it took me hours to roll those up!!!!

Kaydel: I’m sorryyyyy

Rey: I can help fix it, the guest list is pretty simple.

Zorii: I just need to finish fixing this droid I’ll be right there.

Phasma: I will provide moral support from halfway across the galaxy.

Rose: Thank you guys  🥰

Zorii: Np- this is the only actual fun event we’ve had in forever

Rey: Agreed. I think we just need this party to remember that you can take a break from the war occasionally.

Phasma: At least you guys have friends. Lone gal in the FO  😭   


Kaydel: Aww we’re sorry Phasma  🖤

Rose: At least we’ll all get together soon :)

Zorii: Yep! Gotta focus on that you guys. And I fixed the droid, coming to help w/ streamers.

Rey: Yea the porg had a field day.

Rose: It made a NEST out of my precious streamers...

Kaydel: I’M SORRY

Rose: It’s fine. I think we’ve all adopted the porg at this point. It is our child and in our eyes can do no wrong

Zorii: I don’t like it. I don’t agree with it. But I will accept the porg being here. I will NOT adopt it tho.

Phasma: Zorii get over the murder porg, would you?

Zorii: NeVeR

Rey: I have a box of wookie cookies in my room

Zorii: ...fine

Kaydel: Ooh can I have some?

Rey: Nyoh they are mine. And Zorii only gets some if she stops screaming about the porg.

Zorii: My one weakness. I hate you.

Rey: I know

Rose: iS aNyOnE gOiNg To HeLp FiX tHe StReAmErS???


	24. Invitations

Rey: I sent all the invitations.

Phasma: Kaydel and I finished planning the food. You guys are gonna have to make a lot of it yourselves at the base.

Rose: We’re good with decoration plans, but we don’t have balloons.

Zorii: I found some rubber gloves in the med bay we can inflate. The medics were getting rid of them.

Kaydel: Phasma do you want to get together to cook the food sometime? We can find a way to sneak into the kitchen again.

Phasma: Yay!

Rey: We can all help w/ food.

Zorii: As long as it doesn’t turn into another fight...and Kaydel doesn’t get distracted by porgs.

Rose: And we don’t have to wake up at 2 in the morning.

Rey: And Kaydel doesn’t need to brush her hair first. YoU tOoK fOrEvEr

Kaydel: I’m sorry!!!

Rose: We’ll have to do it secretly tho- fastest way to get kicked out of Resistance = get caught revealing it to a FO member :)

Zorii: It is for party reasons.

Phasma: I seriously doubt that will save our butts.

Zorii: Ya never know!

Rey: I’m with the Captain on this one.

Rose: agreed

Kaydel: the porg and I both agree

Zorii: y’all just teaming up on me

Rey: Umm guys Poe just came up to me and asked why he wasn’t invited.

Rey: halp

Rose: I thought he was invited?

Rey: I thought it was a bad idea cause u know how much he hates Arm + the FO. He would probably try to kill ur boyfriend.

Phasma: And me

Kaydel: And Mitaka

Zorii: And really anyone who isn’t Resistance.

Rose: uhhhh tell him it must have blown away

Rose: U left it by his X-Wing

Rey: k

Rey:aoirenvaoc

Zorii: The heck?

Rey: Poe was trying to see my screen I had to grab the phone back

Phasma: Yea it’s probably best if he doesn’t see us talking about him murdering all our friends xD

Kaydel: And the fact that a good 50% of our frens are in the FO

Kaydel: Or in Jannah’s case, used to be in the FO

Rose: Wow I just realized she’s right.

Zorii: And the other 50% is on this chat :)


	25. Stormpilot pt2

Finn has started a chat room

Finn invited Poe

Finn: Did you get an invitation?

Poe: To Jannah’s b-day? Yea.

Finn: Same. You going?

Poe: Definitely.

Finn: Yea. I wonder who else was invited?

Poe: A few of the other pilots. Chewie was too.

Finn: Yea...though the way the girls are constantly sneaking around these days makes you wonder if they’re inviting FO members too.

Poe: xDDD as if

Finn: I know, right? Remember that rumor that Rey and Kylo were friends?

Poe:  🤣 Don’t remind me that was hilarious

Finn: Some people are a little too imaginative

Poe: Agree. The other day, someone told me Lieutenant Connix and Captain Phasma know each other. I mean Connix has been on like, two missions away from base. She’s never been anywhere near Phasma xDDD

Finn: I didn’t hear that one. People are strange...

Poe: I’m just glad there’s going to be some sort of fun event. I mean, or course it’s hard to have fun during a war, but some days it’s just plain boring.

Finn: Like when ur stuck at base and everyone else seems to actually have something to do but ur just sitting there.

Poe: Yass I hate that. And when you DO have something to do, it’s like life-or-death. I think everyone needs a party.

Finn: True, true. Plus, Jannah’s b-day, yay!

Poe: Yep. Wonder if the horses’ll be there.

Finn: I hope not- I almost fell off!!

Poe: You looked amazing, I assure you  😘


	26. Kitchen Squad

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Birthday Planners

Kaydel named chat  ** Kitchen Squad **

Kaydel: Alright. Phasma and I are here.

Rose: We’re by the tree.

Phasma: There are many trees. HoW iS yOuR bAsE sO gReEn??

Rey: I know right?? I still don’t believe it!

Zorii: Alright you two can discuss your tree-less lives later. Let’s get cooking.

Kaydel: Literally.

Rey: AHH ROSE TURN THE FLASHLIGHT OFF!!!!

Rose: sry!!

Rey: WE’RE TRYING TO SNEAK INTO THE KITCHEN WITH A FO MEMBER!!!!

Rose: Okay good point

Zorii: we have a problem

Phasma: Someone’s coming?

Rey: I know a good hiding spot!

Zorii: Kaydel brought the porg

Rose: ...

Kaydel: what do you mean by ‘we’ have a problem?

Rey: You are the only one who has a problem with that porg.

Zorii: IT’S TRYING TO BITE ME!!!!

Kaydel: she just wants to cuddle with you

Phasma: Aww...

Zorii: DON’T BRING THAT THING NEAR ME!!! 

Rose: Just cuddle with her, it can’t be that bad.

Zorii: FINE BUT I HATE YOU ALL

Zorii: Wait.

Zorii: She’s actually quite soft.

Zorii: and fluffy

Zorii: aww I think she likes me guys!

Rey: Guys the porg just tamed Zorii

Rey: She’s like, snuggling with it

Phasma: I’m just over here squealing into my hand so we don’t wake anything up. This has to be the cutest thing I’ve EVER seen

Rose: This is so wholesome

Rey: I ship

Phasma: lmho same

Rose: I can’t even they’re so adorable

Kaydel: Guys, as cute as this is, we’ve been watching them snuggle for fifteen minutes.

Zorii: Sry, she’s so adorable!!!!!

Kaydel: I need my porg back.

Zorii: ...fine. I’ll miss you porg  🖤🖤🖤

Phasma: Is every day like this 4 u?

Rey: What do u mean?

Phasma: Completely awesome and funny and amazing

Rey: You don’t have any friends in the FO, do you?

Phasma: no

Rey: I can relate  😕

Rose: Are you two hugging???

Phasma: Maybe

Zorii: Someone warn Ben that Phasma’s trying to steal his gf

Rey: Shut up and if anyone tells him that I promise there will be no planet in the galaxy you can hide from me on

Kaydel: I can see why she and Kylo like each other.

Phasma: Let’s just go cook guys, we’ve been standing here for half an hour


	27. Cooking

Kaydel: Okay guys. We’re here. Les do trains.

Rose: Trains?

Kaydel: I meant to say this. Stupid autocorrect

Zorii: xDDD alright, let’s do this thing.

Phasma: Rey can you do the fruit salad?

Rey:  👍

Kaydel: Rose and Zorii I need ur help w/ the cake.

Zorii: can I cuddle with the porg while we work?

Kaydel: Nobody steals my child.

Zorii: Pleaseeee?

Rose: Zorii that’s the worst attempt at puppy-dog eyes since Paige’s tooka cat

Kaydel: ...fine. Just this once

Zorii:  🖤

Phasma: I’ll make fruit punch.

Kaydel: Alright Girlsquad (minus the b-day girl). Les do this!

Rey: You spelled it right this time :)

Zorii: Where’s the flour?

Rose: Back cabinet, under the sugar.

Zorii: AHH NOOOOOOO

Rey: What now?

Zorii: I dropped the flour.

Kaydel: IT’S ALL OVER ME

Rose: AND ME

Zorii: and me and the porg.

Phasma: You’re like 2 feet away from each other y are we all texting??

Rey: We’re trying to be quiet and not get caught. *cough* *cough* Zorii *cough*

Zorii: I’M SORRY

Phasma: ur right this is even funnier in person xDDDD

Rose: I HAVE FLOUR IN MY EAR!!!! 


	28. Heart-To-Heart

Phasma: I finished the punch.

Rey: I need halp

Rey: There’s like a mountain of fruit over here

Phasma: Assistance is on the way

Rey: Thank you :)

Zorii: lmho I ship

Rey: SHUT UP ZORII OR I’M TAKING THE PORG

Zorii: You wouldn’t

Rey: Try me

Kaydel: I’d quit now Zorii

Rose: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Zorii: I still ship but plz don’t take the porg  🥺

Kaydel: Zorii get back to work.

** On a private chat with Rey and Phasma **

Rey: Ty

Phasma: No prob I had nothing else to do

Rey: :)

Phasma: So is every day like this 4 u?

Rey: I mean we’re at war, but we still manage to have fun.

Phasma: Lucky.

Rey: No friends in FO?

Phasma: Friends and FO aren’t two words u typically use in a sentence.

Rey: hmm. Have u read the Hunger Games?

Phasma: No. Why? Is this some sort of Jedi wisdom?

Rey: :) definitely not. Kylo and Hux both like the series. You guys should start a book club!

Phasma: They read the series?

Rey: Yea...I hacked one of their chats once, they were talking about the book. Maybe you guys could all read Harry Potter or something? I’ve heard that’s a good series.

Phasma: YOU NEVER READ HARRY POTTER?!?!?!!

Rey: no

Phasma: I have the whole series. You NEED to read it.

Rey: What’s the first one?

Phasma: The Sorcerer’s Stone, I’m sending you my copy as soon as I get back.

Rey: :) you should introduce the guys

Phasma: yea definitely


	29. Wookie Cookies

Zorii: Okay. I think that’s everything.

Rose: ughhh it’s 3 in the morning. We’ve been up all nighttttt

Kaydel: Cake, check. Punch, check. Blue milk, check. Fruit salad, check. Veggies, check. Sandwiches, check.

Phasma: uh...guys?

Rose: Oh no. What?

Phasma: We forgot to make the wookie cookies.

Kaydel: Oh. No.

Rey: Okay, okay, we still have an hour until the kitchen staff wakes up. That should be enough time. We just need to work fast and work together.

Zorii: Let’s do this. Hands.

Rose: Hands.

Kaydel: Party on 3

Zorii: 3

Rey: 2

Rose: 1

Kaydel: Party!

Rey: Party!

Zorii: Party!

Phasma: Party!

Rose: Party!

Kaydel: Zorii, get the bowls.

Phasma: Rose, measuring cups. Rey, flour and sugar.

Rose: Ahh which ones???

Kaydel: We should need 1/2 and 1/4. Also 1 tsp and 1/2 tbsp.

Rey: There’s no more flour Zorii dropped it all!

Zorii: We found some backup supplies next to the eggs

Phasma: Oh shoot eggs! I forgot to grab those...

Kaydel: Phasma watch out-

Kaydel: oh no

Rey: *screeches* PHASMAAAAA  


Rose: What happened now?

Kaydel: Come over here.

Rose: We’re mixing the batter we can’t.

Kaydel: Rey and Phasma ran into each other.

Kaydel: She’s covered in eggs.

Zorii: Who???

Phasma: I’m so sorry!!!

Rose: oh. Zorii, you take over I need to do something.

Rey: NO NO NO ROSE DON’T YOU DARE-

Zorii: What’d she do?

Rose: I took a pic and sent it to a certain guy heheheh

Rey: I hate all of you. Except the porg.


	30. Jannah’s B-Day

Rose: Okay. We’re all ready. How much longer until Jannah gets here?

Kaydel: We’re on our way. She believed our story, I feel so bad for her  😭

Rey: We seriously don’t deserve her.

Phasma: First Order peeps just arrived, we’re hiding now.

Zorii: Great, so are the rebels.

Rose: Where r u guys? I haven’t seen Arm in weeks  ☹️

Kaydel: Uhh guys she’s like freaking out and searching for a med kit!

Rey: We probably shouldn’t have told her Zorii was injured while scouting...

Phasma: But that’ll make her feel so much happier when she realizes it’s a b-day party

Kaydel: She thinks we forgot, I’m tearing up over here  😭

Zorii: Ahhhh how much longer???

Kaydel: Landing now.

Rey: I see you.

Kaydel: We can’t see you.

Rose: Tell her to leave the med kit- get Zorii back to the ship first, then take care of her wounds.

Kaydel:  👍

Phasma: They’re coming!!!

Zorii: Count of three

Rey: 1

Rose: 2

Phasma: and...


	31. Dancing

Kaydel started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: agh my eardrums u guys were so loud ;)

Rey: oh shoot

Rey: ROSE GET BACK HERE I NEED HELP

Rey: WHERE IS SHE???

Phasma: Give her a break, she’s with Arm. They haven’t talked in weeks.

Rey: Yea small problem. The Rebels and FO members are all staring at each other. This couldn’t get any more awkw-

Kaydel: ???

Zorii: She spotted Ben :)

Zorii: You know what, I’ll take care of this. You go say hi.

Rey:  🖤 Thank you I will be right back I promise.

Kaydel: I doubt that.

Zorii: Give her a break, it’s a party. Let’s go stop this thing from blowing up in our faces.

Kaydel: I’ll put some music on

Zorii: Noice I can get everyone on the dance floor

*****************************************************************************************

Jannah: Is this what you guys have been doing the last few weeks?

Rose: Yep :) You deserve it.

Jannah: Thank you guys so much, this is the most amazing birthday EVER

Jannah: You guys are the best  🖤

Zorii: We tried. Now come on, let’s dance!

Phasma: Nice DJ-ing Kaydel!!!

Kaydel: This is the most fun I’ve had in my life!!!

Zorii: Yeah let’s hear it for DJ Kaydel!!!!

Kaydel: Any songs the birthday girl wants to dance to?

Jannah: Do you have Confident?

Kaydel:  👍

Phasma: lmho where’s Rey? I haven’t seen her since we were setting up decorations.

Rose: Dancing in the corner. Everyone kept giving them death stares so they moved.

Zorii: Where r u?

Rose: Different corner, same reason.

Jannah: Okay no. Today is my birthday, and as the birthday girl’s best friend, you have to dance in the middle of the floor with me. As does Arm, and the rest of you. :) Come on how bad can it be? 

Rose: ...Only cause it’s your birthday.

Zorii: Phasma u don’t need to drag her xD

Phasma: I’m not dragging her, I’m aggressively pulling her

Phasma: And Arm

Kaydel: And texting at the same time- impressive!

Jannah: Alright u guys les do this. Someone get Rey. And Zorii, get Mitaka because he and Phasma have been watching each other the whole time, I’m not blind.


	32. Stormpilot Figures Out The Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus chapter!!!! Because, well, Stormpilot can’t wait.

Finn has started a chat room

Finn invited Poe

Finn: Are you seeing this?

Poe: What?

Finn: I don’t know, the fact that Captain Phasma, General Hux, and Kylo Ren are dancing with Jannah, Rose, Rey, and Zorii???

Poe: They are? What???

Finn: Center of the dance floor. Kaydel’s cheering them on.

Poe: ...they look like they know each other.

Finn: I think they do?

Poe: But who invited all the First Order members? Are they insane?

Finn: I think the girls planned the party.

Poe: So they...purposely invited First Order members?

Rose: You two quit complaining and start dancing. And Poe, no more wookie cookies!

Finn: Rose, what the- did you invite the First Order members?

Rose: No, Rey wrote invitations. I arranged decorations- which is harder than you think! Kaydel’s porg got into my streamers and they were EVERYWHERE

Poe: So...Rey invited the First Order members?

Rose: Well, we had to ask Phasma and Arm and Ben since we don’t know a ton of FO members...well actually we do now that I think about it.

Phasma: Rose where’s you go?  


Rose: My feet hurt, I had to take a break.

Phasma: I told you those flats were a bad idea...

Rose: Zorii kept stepping on my toes! The shoes are fine.

Finn: Wait...Captain Phasma? What the heck?

Phasma: Hi Finn! That sounds like hyphen  🤣

Poe: Can someone please explain what’s going on???

Rose: We’re all together to celebrate Jannah’s birthday  🥳

Finn: Yes but why are there First Order members?

Rose: Well Phasma’s part of Girlsquad, Rey’s dating Ben, I’m dating Arm, Phasma has a crush on Mitaka but refuses to admit it-

Phasma: Oh shut up Rose

Poe: Wait...who’s dating who now?

Rose: I’m dating Arm, Rey’s dating Ben, and Phasma has a crush on Mitaka.

Finn: Arm? Ben? I know Mitaka tho.

Rose: ARMITAGE HUX AND KYLO REN

Poe: ...

Poe: ...

Poe: ...

Poe: WHAT??????

Rose: You know Phasma, I think I’m ready to dance some more


	33. ‘Epic’ Chase Scene

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Girlsquad

Rose: Guys get over here I think Finn and Poe aren’t very happy about the guest list.

Zorii: What?

Rose: They’re  _ kinda _ angry about all the FO members.

Rey: Oh no, they’re heading over towards Arm and Phasma

Kaydel: Phasma watch out!

Phasma: Oh force he’s following us!

Rose: Aghh I’m coming!

Rey: Head towards Jannah!

Phasma: Where r u???

Rose: Over by the food

Kaydel: DJ booth sry

Rey: Edge of the forest but don’t come over

Jannah: Dance floor come on!

Phasma: Trying!

Phasma: Agh no they’re right behind meurahtvcnroamx

Kaydel: ???

Phasma: Jannah just pulled us over to her

Jannah: Doesn’t seem to be stopping them

Rey: Over here! At the edge of the forest, I can see you. We’re waving.

Phasma: I see you

Jannah: I’ll try to sidetrack them.

Kaydel: I’ll keep lookout since I can see the whole party from here. And I’m sending the porg!

Rose: Agh I can’t get to u right now I’m handing out food

Phasma: Safe 4 now

Phasma: Sry for crashing ur date

Rey: Np we just want to avoid a fight

Jannah: They’re asking me where u went!

Rose invited Arm

Rose invited Ben

Rose: Just because it was getting awkward.

Arm: Would someone please explain why Phasma’s been dragging me around and typing?

Ben: Finn and Poe are annoyed that there are FO members, and they were chasing u

Arm: Ohh

Kaydel: CODE RED THEY’RE COMING YOUR WAY

Jannah: SCATTER SCATTER SCATTER

Ben: Too late

Rey invited Stormpilot

Rey: Okay let’s just do this digitally so we don’t cause a scene.

Rose: Wait did you group them as Stormpilot? Is that like their ship name? *gasps* AWESOME!!!


	34. Explain

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Rose invited Arm

Rose invited Ben

Rey invited Stormpilot

Phasma: Okay. Let’s settle this.

Finn: YOU INVITED FIRST ORDER MEMBERS TO JANNAH’S BIRTHDAY PARTY!?!??!?!?!!?

Arm: Yes.

Ben: Why do you think we’re here?

Poe: ARE YOU INSANE???? FIRST ORDER MEMBERS!! FIRST ORDER!!!!

Rose: We’ve been over this.

Phasma: We’re all just here to celebrate Jannah

Rey: And have a good time

Kaydel: And take a break from the war

Jannah: And dance

Zorii: What did I miss???

Arm: an epic chase scene

Zorii: Ahh

Finn: DO ANY OF YOU REALIZE HOW DANGEROUS THIS IS??? PHASMA KYLO AND HUX ARE ALL MURDERERS!!!!

Rose: Okay, first, their names are Phasma, Ben, and Arm. Second, you were a stormtrooper.

Poe: A STORMTROOPER WHO DEFECTED!!!  _ THEY _ ARE STILL IN THE FIRST ORDER!!!

Kaydel: Okay listen flyboy. Phasma was born on a backwater planet that was made virtually uninhabitable. The First Order was her way off that planet. It basically adopted her, took her in when  _ no one else cared _ . The Resistance didn’t do a thing. The First Order gave her a home and a cause to believe in. So leave Phasma  _ alone _ . Seems like you’re good at that.

Phasma: dang Kaydel where did you even learn this

Kaydel: *shrugs* I gotta get back to DJ-ing, you guys have fun

Finn: GENERAL HUX AND KYLO REN????

Rose: I think we can handle this one

Arm: Definitely

Rose: So you know how we had a spy who told us about Exegol and the Final Order?

Poe: Doesn’t everyone???

Arm: I’m the spy

Finn: ...what???

Arm: I am spying on the First Order for the Resistance.

Jannah: They’re also dating.

Zorii: How long has that been going on anyway?

Rose: Like a month or two after Crait.

Poe: You guys are...dating?

Rose: Yes we’ve discussed this

Arm: Stay away from my girlfriend Dameron

Jannah: xD aww you guys are adorable

Finn: She bit you

Arm: Yep

Finn: You slapped me

Arm: You threw Phasma down a trash compactor

Phasma: I LIVED-

Ben: don’t finish that meme

Phasma: Fine.

Poe: Kylo Ren?

Ben: Ben Solo, thank you very much

Rey: Here goes...

Finn: Rose said you guys were dating

Rey: Rose is not wrong

Finn: WHAT THE-

Jannah: We’re not even trying to keep this clean any more...

Finn: Umm you tried to MURDER ME

Finn: AND YOUR OWN FATHER

Ben: I admit to both of those. To be fair, you attacked me.

Rey: Finn he killed the Supreme Leader

Poe: Not true

Ben: That was a cover story

Poe: Sure

Rey: It was! I’m sure Zorii can hack the security footage?

Zorii: Yea easy

Arm: can u get the elevator footage too? I’ve been trying to get to it for months.

Zorii: Np

Rey: Oh force.

Finn: So you guys all know each other???

Zorii: Pretty much

Rose: Yeah, Phasma’s part of Girlsquad

Arm: And we’re also starting a book club

Poe: This has been going on for how long???

Jannah: idk a while tho

Finn: ...one day. One day, we can be friends and celebrate Jannah’s birthday. After that, we’re enemies.

Zorii: As long as no one’s killing each other.

Ben: Yea that would probably put a damper on the party...


	35. When The Party’s Over

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Zorii: That was AWESOME

Rose: agreed!!! So much fun!!!!

Jannah: Thank you guys so much, no one’s ever celebrated my birthday before  🖤

Jannah: How’d you guys even track down everyone from my old company anyway?

Rey: It took a while, but it was worth it :)

Zorii: One last round of applause for DJ Kaydel and her assistant porg!!!

Phasma:  👏👏👏

Rose: Yea amazing music Kaydel!!

Rey: And let’s not forget Zorii and Rose’s cake xDDD

Phasma: Jannah u still had icing in ur hair when we left  🤣

Kaydel: I still can’t believe you let Rose smash it in your face

Jannah: I didn’t!

Rose:  😁

Zorii: Noice Rose

Rey: Well this has been great, but I’m exhausted- night everyone

Rey: And happy birthday Jannah  🥳

Jannah:  😊 Night

Kaydel: Yea I haven’t slept in two days, I’m gonna get some rest

Rose: Wait then who’s piloting?

Zorii: Don’t worry I got it

Jannah: That makes me even more worried

Zorii: Wow thanks for the confidence you guys

Phasma: :) see ya

Phasma: And Rose don’t forget- book club meeting next weekend

Rose: See you there  👍


	36. Book Nerds of the Galaxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here’s where everyone starts fangirling.

Kylo has started a chat room

Kylo invited Book Nerds

Rey named chat room  Virtual Book Club

Kylo: Welcome to the first official meeting of the Virtual Book Club.

Phasma: Yay fun!

Rose: What book should we all read?

Hux: What books has everyone read recently?

Rey: I just finished the first Harry Potter.

Kylo: I’m halfway through Catching Fire.

Hux: Everlark

Kylo: Everthorne

Rose: Gale/Peeta

Rey: Why does Katniss need to be in a romantic relationship? (But if I have to ship something, Katniss/Prim)

Hux: Rey get out of here.

Rey: EvErLaRk SuCkS

Hux removed Rey

Phasma invited Rey

Phasma: I have no clue what you guys are talking about but I just finished The Cursed Child. #ScorpiusDeservedBetter

Hux: Oh I loved that one

Hux: WAIT YOU’VE NEVER READ THE HUNGER GAMES?!??!?!?

Rose: Don’t say no-

Phasma: No.

Phasma: Uh oh

Hux: HOW HAVE YOU NEVER READ SUZANNE COLLINS’ BEAUTIFUL TRILOGY!?!?!??!?

Hux: REY GREW UP IN A FREAKING TRASH DUMP AND SHE’S READ IT!!!!!

Kylo: Bro don’t say that

Rey: :(

Rose: Well, to be fair, Phasma lived on a backwater planet for most of her life as well. There’s not going to be a giant public library.

Hux: sry. My point is, you must read The Hunger Games.

Phasma: Umm you’re hyperventilating should I be scared?

Rose: Maybe we should pause the meeting for a few days so Arm can calm down

Hux: I JUST CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’VE NEVER READ THE HUNGER GAMES, HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE!?!?!?!?

Rey: Wow he’s a bigger fangirl than Rose

Rose: Or you. Don’t lie to me, I saw you squealing over that Gadge fanfiction!!!

Rose: Well, I heard u first ;)

Rey:  😊 Aww you’re making me blush

Hux: A fellow Gadge, nice!

Rose: you’re such a traitor, I thought you said you liked Gale/Peeta.

Hux: I think she only said that so you didn’t murder her.

Phasma: So...let’s pick up this meeting later?

Kylo: yea. Hey, we were going to have a movie night tonight, u want to join?

Hux: Which movie?

Rey: Titanic :)

Rose:  🎵 You’re here, there’s nothing I fear 🎵

Hux:  🎵 And I know that my heart will go on 🎵

Rey:  🎵 We'll stay forever this way 🎵

Kylo:  🎵 You are safe in my heart and 🎵

Phasma: What just happened???

Rey: *finishes for Phasma*  🎵 My heart will go on and on 🎵

Kylo: Never seen the movie?

Phasma: No, and due to the very random musical that just occurred, I would not like to. You guys enjoy tho!


	37. Movie Night

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Hux

Rose invited Kylo

Rose invited Rey

Rose: We need to get together for a movie again sometime.

Kylo: So you can cry again? ;)

Rey: Girl you used up a whole box of tissues!

Rose: Arm used two

Kylo: Really?

Hux:  😡 You promised you wouldn’t tell!

Rey: I think we all cried  😭

Kylo: Agreed

Rose: What movie should we watch next time?

Hux: You guys are gonna laugh, but there’s this really good movie called Strange Magic...and we should definitely watch it.

Rey: It’s a cartoon movie?

Hux: Yes it’s animated, but the songs are really good, and...I liked it  😊

Kylo: Looks interesting- next weekend sound good?

Rose: Yep

Hux: Definitely

Rey: Yea

Rose: Ooh can we watch the Harry Potter series? Phasma can come too!

Phasma: As long as I’m not a third wheel I’ll come

Rey: You know at this point I’m not even surprised she hacked us I’m just so used to it

Hux: ikr we all just keep hacking each other

Kylo: lol Phasma u won’t be a third wheel we promise

Rose: Yea ur our friend :)

Phasma: Ty you guys are awesome

Kylo: Have u seen the HP movies tho?

Phasma: Not yet.

Rey: GUYS GUYS GUYS LET’S DRESS UP AS HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS!!!!

Hux: yes

Rose: ooh fun we can make butterbeer too!

Kylo: Can I be Draco?

Rose: Luna Lovegood

Rey: Hermione

Hux: Ron of course :)

Phasma: Ginny Weasley

Rose: Does this mean Arm and Rey are dating?

Kylo: xDDD no

Hux: I’m coming 4 ur girlfriend  🙃

Rey: no you’re creepyyyyyyyyyy

Rose: No one’s Harry darn

Kylo: Mitaka is

Phasma:  😡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...wow. Don’t Give Star Wars Characters A Phone is currently at 179 kudos. Just wanted to say a huge thank you to everyone who’s read, left kudos, and helped me improve the story by leaving comments. Also a thanks to the people who made the three sequels and created all these awesome female characters for Girlsquad, villains-who-aren’t-really-villains, cool creatures, and fun planets for the other three groups to wreak havoc on.


	38. Final Battle

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Jannah: I can’t believe its been a whole year since the Final Battle.

Rose: Why does everyone call it the Final Battle if we’re still fighting?

Zorii: Do we really have to talk about this.

Rey: Agreed.

Phasma: Final Battle?

Kaydel: Everyone in the Resistance calls that big fight against the Final Order the Final Battle.

Rose: But we’re still fighting.

Rey: Yea I was kinda hoping it would be over by now. You know the ‘Final Battle’ would actually be the final battle of the war...

Zorii: yea...

Jannah: well this kinda went downhill

Phasma: yep. Well, thousands of people died and we’re still fighting. Don’t see how that’s happy...

Jannah: Okay. But we’re all still together, and still here.

Rose: and thousands of others are not.

Rey: F

Zorii: F

Kaydel: F

Phasma: ???

Zorii: Kaydel has introduced us to memes

Rey: Among other things

Phasma: me-me?

Kaydel: yOu ReAlLy HaVeN’t LiVeD, hAvE yOu?

Zorii: Send her the one you made about Poe!

Rose: Why do I not know about said memes?

Rey: You were talking with Arm and we’d finished all our work and stuff so Kaydel introduced us to memes.

Phasma: xD love the Poe one

Kaydel:  😊

Jannah: Has anyone ever noticed that if you use these emojis it looks like a farting dog?  🐩💨

Rey: Who corrupted Jannah?

Zorii: Kaydel

Rose: Kaydel

Kaydel: kAyDeL

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone wants more Girlsquad mayhem, check out Truth Or Dare. It’s a modern middle school AU of the sequel girls...well, acting like schoolgirls.


	39. New Song

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Girlsquad

Rey: I found a new song.

Jannah: Oh no.

Kaydel: Is this going to get stuck in my head again?

Rey: hehehe maybe. 

Rey: It’s all about us and stuff!

Phasma: Resistance?

Rey: Everyone! Rose, Phasma, me, oh...well not Jannah and Zorii. Or Kaydel...but Amilyn is  🖤

Kaydel: That’s good. Amilyn deserves a song about her.

Rose: Agreed. 

Jannah: do you think someone’ll write a song with me and Zorii too?

Zorii: And Kaydel?

Rey: I hope, that would be awesome!

Phasma: I am intrigued. Send me the song please.

Rey:  👍 Let’s just wait a few minutes so Phasma can watch this.

Zorii: Ooh send the rest of us!

Rey: On it.

Phasma: This song is so wholesome

Zorii: We need to all get together and sing this.

Rose: Let’s sneak up on Poe and Finn while they’re on a date and start singing.

Jannah: Can we sing the ‘Finn’s bromance is in trouble’ line?

Kaydel: Yes. We must.

Phasma: Tell me what happens!

Rey: You should come!!!

Phasma: ooh can I?

Jannah: Of course!

Zorii: You’re part of Girlsquad, aren’t you?

Kaydel: Alright everyone, memorize the lines over the next few days.

Rey: And then...we strike

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is The Last Jedi Recap Rap by The Warp Zone 😁


	40. Costume Prep

Hux has started a chat room

Hux invited Book Nerds

Hux: How’s prep for the HP movie night going?

Rose: Terrible. I might just go as Cho Chang. I made a Ravenclaw uniform, but I look nothing like Luna  ☹️

Kylo: You need radish earrings :)

Rose: Oh I forgot about those! Will add

Phasma: Mine’s actually pretty good. Ginny’s pretty simple. Though her hair is so longggg...I’m not sure what to do there.

Hux: Oh yeah, about Ginny...

Phasma: Oh no. What?

Hux: We invited Mitaka. He’s read the whole series. He’s seen all the movies. He’s a huge fan.

Phasma: ARMITAGE HUX I SWEAR IF YOU-

Hux: He asked if he could dress up as Harry Potter.

Phasma: I hate you

Hux: I know

Rose: Oh that reminds me I found this adorable new ship. Rey I’m sending you the link to some new fanfiction...

Rey: Dramione. Oh I already knew about that. It’s beautiful isn’t it?  🖤🖤🖤

Kylo: One of these days I will find out what you’re talking about...

Rose: Lmho I’ll send you the link too

Rose: Guys we gotta corrupt Ben

Hux: Well getting back on topic, my costume’s pretty good.

Phasma: You just need a Gryffindor cloak and you’re all set- we actually have to put work in ;)

Rey: I think I went kind of overboard hehehe... I had so much free time...

Rose: oh force what’d ya do this time?

Rey: I’m sending you a pic

Rose: OMIGOD THAT’S AMAZINGGGG!!!!!

Kylo: Can someone plz explain?

Rose: AHHH SHE MADE A DARK HERMIONE COSTUME!!!!!

Phasma: That sounds epic

Hux: Dark Hermione???

Rey: So like a Death Eater Hermione *shrugs*

Phasma: Ooh can I copy?

Rey: Of course :)

Hux: What would a dark Ginny look like?

Phasma: She’d have all black...and maybe a hood like the Death Eater hoods, but no mask...ooh and she’d have a different wand too!

Phasma: *GASP* AND SHE’D WEAR THE SPLINTERS OF HER FIRST WAND IN A LITTLE VIAL TO REMEMBER TO NOT BE WEAKENED BY HER OLD ATTACHMENTS (LIKE HARRY)!!!!!!!

Rey: YASSS THAT SOUNDS AMAZING!!!!!

Rose: Oh crud I forgot to make Luna’s wand...

Kylo: Draco’s costume’s easy.

Hux: That’s because you two are so alike

Hux: Especially that part where he was crying in a bathroom xDDD

Kylo: :) Stop it

Rey: #DracoDidNothingWrong

Hux: How can you even say that???

Rey: DrAcO aNd hIs MoM aRe CoMpLeTeLy InNoCeNt

Rey: LuCiUs DrAgGeD tHeM iNtO tHiS mEsS

Hux: Can someone please explain where she keeps finding this craziness?

Rose: idk I’m not really a huge Draco fan

Phasma: Same

Kylo: Idk but I agree- Draco is innocent

Hux: What? How?

Rey: How are you? How are any of us? Haven’t we all killed people? Who decides who’s guilty and innocent anyway?

Phasma: Next up on Book Nerds of the Galaxy: philosophy lessons and Draco Malfoy Redemption Arc


	41. Why?

Finn has started a chat room

Finn invited Poe

Finn invited Jannah

Finn: Will you please explain to us why you, Rose, Zorii, Rey, and Kaydel jumped out of a bush while Poe and I were on a date and started singing along to a song.

Poe: And why was there a recording of some lady singing along with you?

Jannah: She couldn’t make it to the base but she’s still part of Girlsquad so we had her video herself singing it and played it while we sang in person.

Finn: Ok but WHY?

Jannah: Cause we needed something to do.

Jannah: And we found a new song.

Poe: So you decided to sing it to us

Jannah: Exactly!

Poe: *sighs*

Poe: What did I ever do to deserve this?

Jannah: Can u bother someone else, Kaydel and I are gonna watch a movie

Poe: WHERE DID YOU EVEN FIND A MOVIE????

Jannah: Ask Kaydel!

Jannah has left the chat room

Poe invited Kaydel

Poe: WHERE DID YOU FIND A MOVIE?????

Kaydel: heheheheh

Finn: And why did you jump out from behind a bush?

Finn: And start singing?

Kaydel:To sing this new song we found.

  
Kaydel: Can I go watch my movie now?

Finn: I GIVE UP


	42. Any Questions?

Hux has started a chat room

Hux invited Book Nerds

Kylo named chat room  ** Any Questions? **

Kylo: Okay. So let’s figure some things out.

Hux: What is Dramione?

Rose: *raises hand*

Kylo: Rose.

Rose: The romantic pairing of Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger.

Hux: Huh. Okay then.

Hux: WHAT???

Phasma: Next question

Phasma: Why did you guys invite Mitaka to our party, and is he also coming to book club?

Kylo: We invited Mitaka to annoy you and because he loved Harry Potter. He might be coming to book club? No one knows.

Hux: My turn: how is Draco Malfoy innocent?

Rose: Oh we have a whole notebook for that. You can borrow it sometime.

Hux: A whole notebook????

Rey:  👍 I’ll go grab it

Hux: You guys are insane

Kylo: Draco and his mom are innocent. Lucius dragged them into this mess!

Rey: Agreed

Rose: Agreed

Phasma: Neutral but leaning toward agreement.

Hux: Let me see this notebook...

Hux: THAT THING’S HUGE!!!

Rose: Well the Draco chapter’s only 15 pages

Kylo: “Only 15 pages.” -Rose Tico

Rey: You should see the chapter about Scorpius/Albus

Phasma: That’s a thing??

Rose: I put a LOT of time into that one!

Kylo: Well...any other questions?

Phasma: Why does Jannah keep sending me photos of the word ‘Stormpilot’ written in spray paint on a black and orange X-wing?

Rose: ...that’s a question for another time


	43. Cats

Arm has started a chat room

Arm invited Book Nerds

Arm: Is anyone allergic to cats?

Rose: No. Wait are you talking about-

Arm: NO DON’T TELL YET!

Phasma: No.

Rey: No, why?

Ben: Cats? I mean no, I’m not, but cats???

Arm: Is anyone afraid of cats?

Phasma: No they’re adorable

Rey: Don’t they scratch?

Rose: Only if you provoke them.

Rey: Oh. Then no.

Ben: No, but I don’t like large amounts of cats. One of my mother’s fellow senators had fifteen cats, and they were all very annoying.

Arm: Okay...can I bring my cat Millicent to our Harry Potter party?

Rose: YES I haven’t seen Millie in forever!!!

Rey: Millicent can be Crookshanks  🖤🖤🖤

Ben: Wait...you have a cat???

Phasma: Why did we not know this?

Arm: Idk I didn’t know if we were allowed to have cats.

Arm: Rose occasionally takes Millie for a week or two also.

Rose: YES SHE’S ADORABLE!!!!!

Rose: AND SHE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE CROOKSHANKS!!!

Arm: Millicent is better than Crookshanks. She doesn’t have a squashed face.

Rey: Just look at Arm being so protective of his cat

Phasma: It’s actually quite adorable.

Ben: Can I see your cat?

Arm: I’ll send a pic

Ben: Please bring her she is adorable

Rey: Wait is Mitaka okay with cats?

Rose: Yea he accidentally saw her once.

Phasma: Please bring kitty 

Rose: K I T T Y


	44. Harry Potter Night

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Jannah: So. How was the Harry Potter night?

Rey: Awesome. We started a chicken fight, Rose started screaming about the high ground, and Phasma snorted butterbeer everywhere.

Phasma: Did you reallly need to mention that?

Zorii: Did you guys actually watch the movies???

Rose: Yea, we tried. But when Hermione punched Malfoy, Arm and Ben got into a fight about Draco Redemption Story and Phasma and Mitaka ran off.

Kaydel: DID THEY???

Rey: y e s

Kaydel: *shrieks* I TOLD YOU ZORII!!!!!!!

Phasma: wHaT

Zorii: Kaydel said you and Mitaka would kiss. I said you wouldn’t.

Kaydel: *still shrieking* YOU OWE ME A BOX OF WOOKIE COOKIES

Phasma: I hate you guys  🙃

Zorii: We know

Jannah: Come on details! What else happened?

Rey: Rose kicked my butt in a chicken fight

Rose: Literally

Rey: And that’s when she landed on top of Millicent

Jannah: Millicent?

Kaydel: Armitage’s cat.

Rey: Who dressed up as Crookshanks

Phasma: It was just complete chaos. We made it through like, the first two and a half movies before we stopped paying attention.

Rose: I think we’ve scared Mitaka off.

Rey: Though Phasma’s Dark!Ginny costume was amazing!

Phasma: And hearing Rose screech about the high ground was hilarious

Rose: And we all got into a debate about Dramione and my sanity

Zorii: ???

Rey: Arm thought I was a bad influence xDDDD

Jannah: Kaydel’s the bad influence

Kaydel: I’m not even going to deny that


	45. Which Book?

Arm has started a chat room

Arm invited Book Nerds

Ben named chat  ** Virtual Book Club **

Arm: Okay guys. We need to actually find a book to read together.

Rose: I’ve heard the Divergent series is good?

Ben: NO

Ben: WE ARE NOT READING THE DIVERGENT SERIES

Arm: ???

Ben: Too sad

Rose: I say we read it just to annoy Ben

Rey: I agree

Ben: I will quit this club. I am NOT reading Divergent.

Arm: What if we only read the first book?

Ben: NO. You can’t let it suck you in!

Rey: We can read the first book together and decide if we’ll finish the series on our own.

Rose: I like that idea.

Arm: Outvoted Solo :)

Ben: Fine

Rey: Guys where’s Phasma?

Arm: She was...busy

Rose: WHAT DID YOU DO THIS TIME???

Arm: Nothing!

Rey: Women always figure out the truth.

Rose: Always.

Ben: We set her up on a blind date

Arm: With Mitaka.

Rey: You two...

Arm: Hey, who hacked Finn and Poe’s chat???

Rose: That was for professional reasons

Rey: Yea they were always being awkward around each other and it was ruining our lives.

Ben: So you professionally hooked them up

Rose: ...yes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...if you haven’t read Divergent, there won’t be any major spoilers (and there shouldn’t be any minor spoilers either), you can still enjoy the story, since these guys spend more time arguing and being crazy than actually reading!


	46. Phasma’s Wrath

Phasma started a chat room

Phasma invited Book Nerds

Phasma: So. What book are we reading?

Rey: Divergent

Phasma: Thank you. Oh, and one more question.

Phasma: HUX WHAT THE KRIFF!?!?!?!?

Rose: Language...

Rey: Let her have her moment.

Arm: Ben’s idea

Ben: Hey, no, it was both of ours!

Phasma: YOU TWO SET ME UP ON A BLIND DATE WITH MITAKA!!!!

Arm: Yes we are aware of that.

Phasma: THE SECOND I GET BACK I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU TWO!!!!

Arm: Hey Rose, Rey, do you guys have a spare bunk at the Resistance base?

Rey: We did but not anymore

Rose: It vanished the second Phasma said she would murder you

Rey: Pretty crazy coincidence, huh?

Arm: If there’s one thing I know about Phasma, its that she means what she says.

Rey: Okay good point...we may be able to find a spare bunk?

Rose: How fast is the Falcon?

Ben: Fastest ship in the galaxy

Rey: Faster than any FO ship :)

Phasma: YOU CANNOT ESCAPE THE PHASMA

Ben: Well I don’t know what to say

Rose: We’ll be there in five minutes

Arm: I don’t know if we’ll still be alive then.


	47. Phasma’s Wrath Pt.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another bonus chapter!!!!!  
> So...just wow. Thank you everyone who’s read this, who’s commented, who’s left kudos. Don’t Give Star Wars Characters A Phone is now at 200 kudos...and just wow. Thank you all so so much. I really hope you’re enjoying all the antics, and may the Force be with you.

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Book Nerds

Rey: So how far into Divergent is everyone?

Arm: Pretty far since I’ve been stuck in a Resistance for the past two days.

Phasma: I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU!!!!

Rose: I’m like two chapters in because I’ve been so busyyyy

Rey: I’ve had plenty of reading time on the Falcon so far- waiting for a signal to land and pick up a team

Ben: Same as Arm

Phasma: I’m also two chapters in because I’m busy trying to run the FO without you two idiots.

Phasma: Not like that’s any different from normal.

Rose: Oof

Rey: xD Phasma’s calling you out guys

Phasma: NOW GET BACK HERE AND FIGHT COWARDS

Rose: Hmm...lightsaber vs blaster tho

Rey: At this point, I’d put my credits on Phasma anyway.

Phasma: Aww thanks Rey

Rose: It’s 2 vs 1. I’m going against Phasma

Arm: Thank you Rose

Ben: Though honestly, I think Phasma will kick both of our butts.

Phasma: THAT’S FOR-

Rey: Phasma, again with the language. Please stop. We keep having to set the chat so it blocks out vulgar language.

Phasma: COWARDS!!! I’M GONNA PUNCH YOU IN THE NOSE!!!!

Rose: ???

Phasma: YOU GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW OR I’M COMING TO FIND YOU!!!!

Ben: You don’t know where the rebel base is

Phasma: I’LL ASK KAYDEL

Rey: Wait wait wait! If we hand them over, will you leave the rebel base alone?

Arm: WHAT???

Rey: Last time we had to move bases we almost died out. So Phasma, if we hand them over, will you leave the rebel base alone?

Phasma: hmm...yes. I just want to kill them. I currently have no quarrel with the rest of Girlsquad.

Rey: Alright. We’ll turn ‘em in...


	48. The Plan

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Ben

Rey invited Rose

Rey invited Arm

Rey: Guys, I have a plan

Ben: I knew you were going to say that

Rose: Whatever it is, I’m in :)

Arm: This plan better not be turning us over to Phasma

Rey: Of course not.

Rose: You did make this Phasma-proof, right?

Rey: I don’t even think she knows how to hack private chats. But yes, I put up extra protection.

Ben: Let’s hear this plan.

Rey: I’ll pilot the Falcon to Phasma, and meet up with her. You guys’ll hide under the floor panels. I can lead her over to you, and you guys can...idk jump out at her or something

Rose: I’ve got an idea for that part...Zorii rigged some blasters to launch confetti and glitter for Jannah’s birthday party. We can douse her with glitter!

Arm: *chuckles evilly* I’m in!

Ben: I feel like that will only make her angrier.

Arm: Yes but two lightsabers and two blasters against one blaster.

Rose: Correction: two lightsabers, one blaster, and an electro-prod. Plus a bunch of glitter blasters

Ben: Glitter blasters. That just sounds like something dangerous, stupid, and extremely fun.

Rey: And knowing us, we’d shoot ourselves accidentally.

Arm: GLITTER FIGHT 2V2!!!! I CALL BEN’S TEAM!!!!!

Rose: Oh, it’s  on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you had to join one club/squad...which one would it be? Just wondering... 🤷♀️


	49. Waiting...

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Ben

Rose invited Arm

Rose invited Rey

Arm named chat **Waiting**

Ben: Is she here yet?

Rey: She’s boarding now.

Rose: Um one question...is she gonna see your phone?

Rey: Nope

Arm: Wait, which way to you point the glitter blaster?

Rose: At Phasma

Arm: I’m being serious

Rose: I’m not. Alright, I’ll help

Ben: ROSE DON’T POINT THAT THING IN MY FACE!!!

Rose: ahh sorry!

Rey: Okay guys she’s on board.

Ben: When do we jump out?

Arm: When Rey brings up porgs

Rey: Quiet! I can hear you guys moving around in there!

Rose: She doesn’t sound suspicious

Ben: 3, 2, 1...

Arm: NOW!


	50. Glitter Battle

Ben has started a chat room

Ben invited Book Nerds

Rose: Can I just say: the thing with the glitter blasters was awesome!!!

Arm: xDDD It was ALL OVER Phasma

Rey: And us

Ben: And the Falcon

Rose: Oh no Phasma’s giving us the silent treatment.

Arm: I still think we should have the glitter blaster fight.

Rey: Sure, why not?

Ben: Many reasons. For one, we’ll be  covered in glitter.

Rose: That’s exactly why it will be awesome and fun!

Arm: Outvoted, Solo

Ben: WHY???

Ben: NOT AGAIN!!!

Rose: xD don’t be such a party crasher and you won’t get outvoted every time

Rey: I call Rose’s team!

Rose: yesss we will kick their butts

Arm: As if!

Ben: I don’t know, they can be quite destructive when they want to be

Rose: hehehe we will crush you

Rey: This will be the second time you guys get your butts kicked by a member of Girlsquad.

Rose: Correction: second time this week

Arm: Ouch we do have a pretty terrible record

Ben: Alright hand over the glitter blasters. Then we’ll see who gets their butt kicked.


	51. Glitter Fight: Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which you all get to see some terrible battle strategies.

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Rose

Rose: Alright what’s the plan?

Rey: Maybe one of us takes the front as a distraction, while the other sneaks up from behind?

Arm: HAHAHAHAHA I CAN SEE WHAT YOU’RE PLANNING!!!!!!!

Rose: Shoot

Rey: Gimme a sec...

Rey removed Arm

Rey: Protection’s up.

Rose: New plan: I can hack their chat and secretly watch their plan. Then we come up with a way to stop them.

Rey:  👍

Rose: They’re gonna do what our OG plan was

Rey: tHiEvErY

Rose: How to we foil their plan...

Rey:We can advance back to back?

Rose: I can see that working...

Rose: Okay, count of three

Rey: 1...

Rose: 2...

Jannah: WhAt iS gOiNg On????


	52. Glitter Fight: Part Two

Arm has started a chat room

Arm invited Ben

Ben: Okay. Let’s work out a plan.

Arm: Or we just hack them and steal their plan xDDD

Ben: YES.

Arm: ...one sec...

Arm: Okay. One of them will sneak up from behind us while the other distracts us in the front.

Ben: I’ll take the front.

Arm: Oh good, I was gonna ask to do the backawererfniopqutao

Ben: Wha- HOLY

Arm: Okay okay new plan!!!!

Ben: Wait, someone just stole my glitter blaster...

Arm: Got it back!

Ben: No I’m over here! That’s Rose!

Arm: OWWW Rey just hit me in the face with glitter!!!

Ben: I don’t think we’re gonna win this

Arm: same

Arm: Do you think they’ll stop shooting us if we surrender?

Ben: I seriously doubt that.


	53. Cleanup

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Book Nerds

Rose: WE WON!!!!!!

Ben: we know.

Rey: How do you get the glitter off?

Arm: You’ve been walking around covered in glitter for an hour???

Rey: No, I’ve spent 45 minutes in a refresher, and I’m STILL covered in glitter. Poe is going to  kill me

Rose: Actually good question is anyone else still covered in glitter?

Ben: Yes

Arm: I washed it off, but Millicent’s covered in it

Rose: please send a pic

Rose: WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE POOR CAT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Arm: Look, I got out of the ‘fresher, she’d pulled the trigger or something and was literally  rolling  in glitter.

Rey: How did you get it off tho?????

Arm: I just used soap?

Rey: ThAtS wHaT iVe bEeN uSiNg FoR tHe LaSt 45 MiNuTeS!?!?!?!?!

Rose: Same

Rey: Can you tell us? Because Poe wants to join me in the Falcon when I go scout and he will MURDER us when he finds out we’re covered in glitter because we spent our free time hosting a glitter fight with FO members!!!!!

Rose: Not to mention the inter-army BOOK CLUB

Arm: hmm....

Ben: I think he’s just biding his time until Poe finds out

Rey: ARMITAGE HUX THIS IS A DANGEROUS POSITION YOU ARE PUTTING US IN!!!! THIS COULD GET ALL OF GIRLSQUAD KICKED OUT OF THE RESISTANCE, NOT TO MENTION YOU, BEN, AND PHASMA KILLED!!!!!!

Rose: Here we go again...

Ben: Why are you guys always yelling at Arm?

Rose: I honestly don’t know

Ben: ooh maybe we could invite Poe to our book club?

Rey: ARM I SWEAR IF YOU DON’T TELL ME I WILL MAKE SURE YOU FIND GLITTER IN PLACES GLITTER SHOULDN’T BE

Rose: Maybe...I don’t think he’s read Divergent...oh yea, where r u in the book?

Ben: Can’t tell you, I’m at a really big part.

Rose: I’m at the part where they climb the Ferris wheel.

Rey: I’M GOING TO STEAL YOUR CAT!!!!!!!!

Ben: Oh I loved that part.

Rose: Same it’s really good! But there’s not a whole lot of action that’s like, important to the story. They’re just training mostly.

Ben: It gets better, promise.

Rose: Got the book in one hand, phone in the other :)

Ben: Now that’s someone who’s living life correctly

Rey: HUX, POE IS LITERALLY OUTSIDE THE DOOR!!!!!! CAN YOU JUST TELL!?!?!?!??!?!?!?


	54. Poe Enters The Scene

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Book Nerds

Rey: Armitage Hux.

Arm: That is me.

Rey: You nearly got Rose and I kicked out of the Resistance.

Arm: How? We’re on opposite sides of the galaxy.

Rey: You refused to tell us how to wash off the glitter.

Ben: You know, I’m surprised no one’s started screaming yet...

Ben: Hey, did Poe want to join the book club?

Rose: Well he was a little busy screaming at us- but we told him we were playing against Jannah and Zorii, so we’re not in  _ as _ much trouble.

Rose: I can ask him about book club tho?

Ben: Sure

Arm: NO THAT IS A VERY BAD IDEA

Phasma: You’re just annoyed cause he’s gonna call you General Hugs. Invite him!

Arm: DON’T INVITE HIM!!!!

Rey: Come on Arm! This could be the first step to getting him to accept the fact that you guys are awesome and hilarious and we’re not traitors for being friends.

Arm: You do realize that when he finds out we had a glitter blaster fight he will murder all of us?

Rose: Little too late anyway. Just asked him if he wanted to join a book club. I said there’s boys and girls, and he and Finn are both welcome.

Ben: That’s safe. What did he say?

Rose: He asked what book we were reading- he hasn’t read Divergent either. He’s asking Finn now.

Rey: So now we wait...

Arm: For our destruction.

Ben: Are you ever not a pessimist?

Phasma: Did Mitaka ever decide if he was joining the club or not?

Rey: And why are you asking?  😉

Phasma: Oh shut up.

Arm: He said yes, he did want to join

Ben: We should probably add him to this

Rey: I already did, he’s probably not on his device right now.

Rose: Poe and Finn both want to join

Phasma: Oh no.

Arm: Well I’m not doing it.

Rey: You know what? Let Rose and I do the talking here.

Rose: Don’t drag me into this!!!

Ben: Yeah, you have fun explaining. I’m going to be watching this on.

Rey invited Stormpilot

Rey: Hi Finn, Poe. Welcome to the Virtual Book Club, where we read books, watch movies, sing the Titanic song, and generally just have fun. We’re currently reading Divergent- you guys’ve never read that, right?

Finn: ...

Poe: ...

Arm: I told you guys...

Poe: Rose. Rey.

Rose: yes?

Poe: Explain. Now.

Phasma: In the words of Kaydel, F in the chat


	55. Explanationing

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Rose

Poe invited Rey

Poe: Okay. Can one of you explain why you started a book club with FIRST ORDER MEMBERS????

Rose: Well, you know Phasma is our best friend and a member of Girlsquad, you also know about Arm and Ben. Arm and Ben invited Mitaka for a few reasons, mainly to annoy Phasma and finally get them to stop hiding the fact that they’re crushing on each other like middle schoolers. And then Ben also wanted to invite you and Finn.

Poe: ...

Rey: Rose I don’t think you should have dumped so much information on him at once.

Poe: HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW SO MANY FIRST ORDER MEMBERS???

Rey: Well, let’s see.

Rey: Rose bit one of them.

Rose: Rey’s got some weird force connection with another.

Rey: One gave the order for Rose to be executed on the  Supremacy .

Rose: And the other secretly has a crush on the executer lady

Rey: We’re all good friends!

Poe: ...I’m not really sure how to respond to that.

Poe: So why were we invited to a book club with murderers?

Poe: And can someone explain this: “Hi Finn, Poe. Welcome to the Virtual Book Club, where we read books, watch movies, sing the Titanic song, and generally just have fun. We’re currently reading Divergent- you guys’ve never read that, right?”

Rey: Well Phasma was lonely so we started a book club.

Rose: What about the intro do we need to explain?

Poe: ALL OF IT

Rose: Well it’s a book club, so we read books. We also watch movies based off of the books, or also if we’re bored.

Rey: Like Harry Potter night!

Rose: I don’t think that counts as watching movies. We spent more time arguing about Dramione, The Hunger Games, Katniss/Prim, Draco Redemption Story, etc etc.

Rey: Okay true.

Poe: Wait, what are you even talking about???

Rose: We sing the Titanic song because we all watched Titanic together and used up like, 20 boxes of tissues.

Rey: And we have fun because...well I don’t think we need to explain that. Our book club is currently reading Divergent, which also probably doesn’t need any explanation.

Poe: Harry Potter night?

Rey: That was fun! We all dressed up as characters from Harry Potter and watched the movies together.

Rose: Though we mostly ended up arguing about fan theories. Plus the whole chicken fight.

Rey: And Arm brought Millicent, who dressed up as Crookshanks!

Poe: He has a cat???

Rose: Yep!

Poe: Who watched Titanic and why?

Rey: Movie night- Rose and Arm joined last minute.

Poe: What is ‘Dramione’, ‘Katniss/Prim’, and ‘Draco Redemption Story’?

Rose: ...you don’t need to know that yet.

Rose: So are you joining book club?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At this point, I just feel bad for Poe...  
> I know he already knew they were friends and all, but I like to think he tries to pretend it was just a weird dream or something xD


	56. Back At Base

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Zorii: AGH IT’S BEEN SO LONG!!!!!!

Jannah: I KNOW!!!!!

Kaydel: I CAN’T BELIEVE WE’RE ALL FINALLY BACK AT BASE TOGETHER!!!!

Rose: What’s everyone been doing lately???? I mean when you’re not on missions and getting fired at :)

Rey: Reading Divergent and getting yelled at by Poe

Kaydel: Taking care of the porg and learning how to fix a droid

Jannah: What did you do to BB-8 this time???

Kaydel: What do you mean this time???? And it’s not BB-8, I found this broken droid in the junk pile and was bored.

Zorii: Just helping out in the kitchens- I’m learning more about cooking.

Jannah: bEiNg A sPaCe CoWgIrL

Rose: KAYDEL!!!!! STOP SHOWING JANNAH THOSE WESTERN MOVIES!!!!

Rey: We should celebrate the fact that we’re all back together!

Jannah: What about Phasma? We shouldn’t leave her out...

Rose: It’s one in the morning where she is right now. She’ll be sleeping.

Kaydel: Good. Cause I have an idea, and it’ll be hard for Phasma to join.

Zorii: Can we rob the kitchens again???

Rey: NO

Jannah: We’re not robbing the kitchen again.

Kaydel: I’ve got a better idea. Let’s play...

Rose: Ooh what’s the game?

Zorii: Kaydel you’ve been keeping us waiting for five minutes.

Kaydel: Fine.

Kaydel: Let’s play...Kiss, Marry, Kill.

Rey: Force save us.

Rose: I don’t know if that’s possible.


	57. Kiss, Marry, Kill

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Rose removed Phasma

Rose: So we don’t wake her up.

Zorii named chat room  Kiss, Marry, Kill

Kaydel: Who’s going first?

Jannah: Wait, how do you even play?

Rose: you’ve never played Kiss, Marry, Kill?

Jannah: never heard of it

Rose: We name three people, and you choose to kiss one, marry one, and kill one.

Jannah: 😳

Rey: Exactly.

Zorii: Wait- are we doing boys and girls, or just boys?

Kaydel: Both.

Kaydel: Alright. I’ll go first. Rose, this is for you. Kiss, marry, kill: Finn, Phasma, and...DJ.

Rose: WHAT????

Rose: Ohhhhh-kay. Kiss Phasma, marry Finn, kill DJ.

Rose: Alright, Jannah, I’m asking you. Kiss, marry, kill: Arm, Poe, and Zorii

Jannah: ....but I don’t want to marry any of them?

Zorii: It’s just a game. If you  _ had  _ to choose.

Jannah: okay, uhhh... I don’t want to kill anyone! Um. Um. Well...kiss Arm I guess? And marry Poe? And kill Zorii?

Zorii: Wow thanks.

Jannah: Well I can’t kill Poe since he’s the leader of the Resistance! And Arm’s the spy, so we’d lose our spy if he died.

Kaydel: Jannah, it’s just a game. Let’s just pretend we are normal girls, and there is no war on.

Jannah:  👍

Jannah: This is for Rey. Kiss, marry, kill: Mitaka, Kaydel, and...Hermione? From Harry Potter?

Rose: YASS let’s add book/movie characters too!!!!

Rey: Um...well...kiss Mitaka. Marry Kaydel. Kill Hermione.

Zorii: This is going to get out of control pretty quickly, isn’t it?

Rey: Zorii. Kiss, marry, kill: Poe, Jeanine (from Divergent), and Kaydel’s porg.

Zorii: Welp. I was right. Kiss...Kaydel’s porg, because it’s adorable. Uh...marry. Okay. Um. Marry Poe, but if any of you tell him I said that, you’re dead.

Kaydel: Oh too late. The second I read ‘Marry Poe’, I told him.

Zorii: KAYDEL!!!!!!!!

Jannah: Cause it’s not a Girlsquad meeting without someone killing someone else...

Zorii: Oh, and kill Jeanine.

Rey: Definitely  👍

Zorii: Okay, who’s next? Kaydel, you haven’t been chosen yet. Kiss, marry, kill...you know what, time for a history lesson. Kiss, marry, kill: Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and...idk Zay Versio.

Zorii: Wait, you all gotta answer this one.

Kaydel: Easy! Kiss Zay, marry Anakin, kill Obi-Wan.

Rose: Uhh... I guess we’re starting with kiss Zay. And marry Obi-Wan. And kill Anakin cause he’s kinda whiny.

Jannah: Hmm. Kiss Anakin. Marry Zay. Kill Obi-Wan. I feel like if I kissed Obi-Wan he’d go tell the Jedi Order and they’d come after me xD

Rey: Kiss...Obi-Wan? Marry Zay. Kill Anakin, he was whiny.

Rose: Okay, one last round. Everyone has to answer.

Rose: Kiss, marry, kill: Darth Vader.

Rey: Oh I’ve got a bad feeling about this round.

Zorii: Yea this one will definitely get out of hand.

Rose: Darth Tyranus.

Jannah: Oh she’s just naming villains now to annoy us.

Rose: And the famous stormtrooper TK-421.

Kaydel: Rose...what even happened to this game?

Rose: You gotta answer!

Jannah: Alright, let’s do this. Kiss...you know what, maybe I’ll go after Zorii.

Zorii: Fine. Kiss....Rose, I hate you. Okay. Kiss...I don’t know! Tyranus? Um. Marry...TK-421??? And kill Vader?

Jannah: Kiss...TK-421? Marry Vader? Kill Tyranus?

Rey: I’m not answering this one.

Kaydel: Same.

Rose: Alright girls, let’s call it a night. 

Zorii: What??? How’d they get out of it???

Kaydel: Poe’s coming over. We gotta scram.

Rey: Glad we’re all back at base together. Missed you guys :)

Jannah: It’s definitely been way too long- let’s get together for lunch tomorrow?

Rose: Definitely!

Zorii: And NO Kiss, Marry, Kill!


	58. Post-War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Probably the only (mostly) serious chapter you will read in this story 😂

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Jannah: Have you ever thought about what you’ll do after the war?

Rose: Sort of

Kaydel: Not really

Zorii: Not at all

Rey: Occasionally

Phasma: No, why?

Jannah: I’ve just been thinking about it lately. What I want to do and who I want to be.

Rey: What do you want to do?

Jannah: I...I was thinking about trying to help the stormtroopers from the First Order find their families again. Finn and I don’t know where we’re from, or who we were. There’s thousands of others out there who are the same.

Rose: That’s a really amazing idea Jannah.

Phasma: Agreed.

Kaydel: What does everyone else want to do?

Rose: I just want to live a peaceful life. Maybe teach others about the war, so we can learn from our mistakes.

Zorii: Oh, that’s a good idea. Is a certain someone involved in this future?

Rose: ????

Zorii: Armitage!

Rose: Oh. Uh...I don’t know. We never really talked about anything after the war...

Jannah: Can I come to the wedding?

Rose: Jannah! I don’t even think he’d want to, you know...get married.

Rey: Rose. I saw you guys at Jannah’s party, and when the book club gets together. He loves you.

Rose: Yea, but...I guess we never thought about it. Retiring, living our lives together, maybe starting a family.

Phasma: Now that we’re thinking about our futures...I might want to stick around and help figure out the new government. I want to make sure the backwater planets get a say in laws as well. Parnassos never had any representation, and half the galaxy doesn’t even know the planet exists.

Rey: Oh that would be amazing Phasma! You’re right, backwater planets are often forgotten.

Rose: Agreed. Some are even used as weapons testers- the First Order shelled my sister and my homeworld to test their weapons.

Jannah: And Kef Bir’s practically hidden from the rest of the galaxy- Finn, Poe, and Rey nearly didn’t find it!

Kaydel: Dulathia is like that as well.

Zorii: Hey speaking of everyone’s homeworld... I had an idea... Maybe I’ll join Phasma in the government.

Jannah: What are you thinking of doing?

Zorii: When the Final Order...you know, attacked Kijimi...a lot of people lost their homes. Because of the war, many people lost their homes and families...maybe I could set up a program that helps people relocate- and it would help Phasma too! We could help people resettle worlds like Parnassos, make them habitable?

Phasma: Yeah, we could work together!

Kaydel: Could I help? I really don’t know what I want to do...but I really think you guys could make a difference for...millions of people, maybe even more.

Rey: What do you want to do Kaydel?

Kaydel: I never thought about it. I’ve always fought for the Resistance, I never really had anything I want to do. What about you?

Rey: I was thinking about opening a training temple for force-sensitives. But not just to train to be Jedi or Sith- they’d learn about both aspects of the force.

Rose: Seems dangerous. Don’t Sith use their anger to fight?

Rey: The dark side is harnessed by using stronger emotions- and while hate is a strong emotion, there are other strong emotions. Vader turned to the dark side because of his love for his family.

Zorii: But still...not like we need any more Vaders running around.

Rey: Well...we technically do. It’s like...you can’t have stars without darkness. There has to be that balance to keep things from getting out of control.

Phasma: It makes sense. I mean, after Order 66, the dark siders had all the power, while the light siders had none. After the second Death Star blew up, the light siders had all the power and the dark siders had none. It’s just...complicated.

Jannah: Very.

Kaydel: You guys all know what you want to do after the war...

Rey: You’ll find something. Maybe you could join Phasma and Zorii and find a position in the government?

Kaydel: Meh. I never really had the patience for that stuff.

Rose: What about piloting?

Kaydel: Rose, I almost crashed the supply crate carrier yesterday.

Rose: Ah, good point. Well you’re the reason the Resistance evacuated D’Quar in record time- you’re a good leader. 

Kaydel: I don’t know. I mean, that was a life-or-death situation. I had to get everyone out of there. I was just making decisions that would get everyone out of there alive- and because I didn’t take time to make sure we had more artillery and fuel, we almost died out.

Zorii: Kaydel, because you made decisions to load the transports with more people than supplies, the Resistance is still alive. By refusing to put supplies first, you saved hundreds of lives!

Kaydel: I don’t know, you guys. I guess I’ll have to think about it.

Phasma: Well one thing’s for sure: whatever you do, you’ll be great at it.

Rey: Yep. No one works harder than our Kaydel :)


	59. BREAKING NEWS FROM KAYDEL

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: GUYS GUYS GUYS!!!!!!!

Rose: What what what???

Kaydel: YOU ARE  NEVER GOING TO GUESS WHAT I JUST FOUND OUT!!!!!

Phasma: Ooh more gossip. Yes please.

Rey: Wait. Who did you hear this from?

Kaydel: NO ONE!!!! I JUST SAW IT TWO MINUTES AGO!!!!!!!!

Zorii: Come on, just tell us!

Jannah: war is over.Wait, who is this about?

Kaydel: SO IT HAS TO DO WITH A CERTAIN TWO PEOPLE!!!!!

Rey: Oh force here we go again...

Rose: Is it Phasma and Mitaka? Are they finally engaged?

Phasma: Rose we just started dating like, two weeks ago.

Kaydel: COME ON GUYS, YOU GOTTA GUESS!!!!! IT’S A CERTAN TWO PEOPLE WHO STARTED THIS WHOLE CRAZY TEXTING THING!!!!!!

Rey: But you just said we’d never be able to guess it. So what’s the point of trying?

Kaydel: SHUT UP AND NO MORE JEDI MIND TRICKS

Zorii: Who started this whole thing...well I guess Rey and Rose taught us how to hack people?

Rose: Zorii, I’m on a different planet than you guys.

Zorii: Oh good point.

Jannah: Wait...didn’t Rose and Rey hack Finn and Poe?

Phasma: Yea, they set them up on a date.

Phasma: WAIT A MINUTE

Phasma: WAIT. A. MINUTE.

Phasma: Did they...are they...KAYDEL!?!?!?!?!?

Jannah: ???

Rey: I honestly don’t know why- oh. Oh. I understood. KAYDEL ARE THEY-

Kaydel: YESSSS!!!!! I JUST SAW POE, HE DOESN’T KNOW I SAW HIM!!!! HE’S GONNA PROPOSE TO FINN!!!!!! AHHHH!!!!!!!

Phasma: AHHHH WOW SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!

Kaydel: YESS!!!!!!!

Rose: This is insane. This is actually insane. Poe is going to propose to Finn???

Kaydel: Yep. I heard him practicing. (XD it was so cringy)

Jannah: Do you know when?

Kaydel: No, and don’t tell Poe that you know. He’ll kill me.

Zorii: Wow a double wedding. Phasma and Mitaka, and Poe and Finn.

Phasma: Are you ever going to let that go? We are dating. We are not planning on anything of the sort anytime soon.

Rey: And then tomorrow we wake up and Kaydel overheard Mitaka getting ready to propose xD

Kaydel: I don’t know...how far away are you from us?


	60. Phasma Being Lonely (And Rose’s Possible Death)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I’m really sorry, I know this chapter is coming out a day late, completely forgot to update the story yesterday and I apologize.

Phasma has started a chat room

Phasma invited Girlsquad

Phasma: I wish we could all get together again like we did for Jannah’s b-day.

Zorii: That was really fun...

Rey: Are there really no other girls in the FO?

Phasma: No others at my rank.

Rey: ???

Phasma: Superior/subordinate friendships aren’t exactly encouraged in the FO.

Rose: Girl, you’re friends with Kylo Ren and General Hux. The literal powerhouses of the FO. They’re not gonna be angry if you find some friends who aren’t your rank.

Phasma: Yeah, but like...Pryde

Rose: *hisses*

Jannah: ???

Zorii: She hates Pryde

Zorii: He shot Arm in the leg once. Among other things.

Kaydel: Okay, but who  doesn’t  hate Pryde???

Rey: hear hear! But honestly Phasma, you should go make some friends :) Girlsquad could always use more members.

Jannah: Yea, you always get stuck hearing about our adventures- you could have your own for a change!

Rose: We definitely need more FO members in Girlsquad.

Phasma: ...Alright. I’ll try.

Zorii: Do or do not. There is no try.

Phasma: Oh shut up Zorii.

Rey: But seriously, it would be really fun to meet other FO members- and Girlsquad would welcome them eagerly :)

Rose: Oh guys I just remember to ask. Has anyone seen Poe lately?

Jannah: What did you do to anger him this time?

Rose: I didn’t do anything! I just need to give him a copy of Divergent. It’s the book our book club’s reading.

Kaydel: Wait, he actually joined?!?!?

Rey: Well we did get a long lecture about not being friends with FO members- which was stupid -and then another one about not making glitter blasters- which was even more stupid cause he wasn’t even using words, he was mostly just glaring at us and starting sentences but not finishing them. Also, Zorii made the glitter blasters.

Rose: But he never said he wasn’t joining!

Phasma: ...RIP

Zorii: here lies Rose Tico, beloved member of Girlsquad. Died after handing Poe a book.

Rose: What is so wrong about giving him a book???

Jannah: Rose. Poe does not like Phasma or Kylo or Arm.

Rose: Yes. This is a learning experience for all of us.

Kaydel: F in the chat


	61. Stormpilot’s First Meeting

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Book Nerds

Mitaka: Hi guys!

Rey: Mitaka! You made it!

Mitaka: Yeah, but Gwen’s been keeping me updated on what goes on at meetings so far.

Rose: Gwen?

Phasma: ...that’s my name  ☺️

Rey: Really? I can’t believe we never asked you, I’m so sorry!

Phasma: It’s totally fine you guys, I mostly just go by Phasma.

Arm: Well which do you want us to call you?

Phasma: Gwen  😁

Phasma changed name to Gwen

Ben: Much better  🙂

Rose: Alright. That’s done with...so Mitaka, welcome to your first official meeting. I’d also like to introduce our two newest members...Poe Dameron and Finn Storm!

Poe: Rose, why am I on this chat?

Rose: This is our book club :)

Finn: ...

Gwen: Listen you two. This is only gonna be awkward if you make it awkward.

Finn: Alright...

Rey: So where is everyone in Divergent?

Ben: Really close to finishing. But I can’t say where cause it’s a huge spoiler.

Arm: Finished.

Rose: Eh...I haven’t had much time to read lately. I’m at the part right after they climb the Ferris wheel.

Poe: Beatrice just chose her faction.

Finn: Caleb just chose his faction.

Gwen: Agh so close to the end but I can’t say where cause it’s a spoiler.

Mitaka: Same place as Gwen.

Rey: Someone just...okay I guess this is a minor spoiler, but someone just jumped off a cliff.

Finn: WHAT???

Rose: Mitaka, when you say same place as Gwen do you mean you guys are reading it together?

Ben: Oh yeah, note for Finn and Poe, we’re constantly shipping something.

Gwen: Are you ever going to let that go? Yes, we’re reading it together, we call each other every night and take turns reading a page each, and we get through a chapter a night.

Arm: Aww that’s so sweet... Gwen/Mitaka=OTP

Poe: Are you acting like a...fangirl?

Ben: Well fanboy technically, but yes. He does this often. We all do.

Rey: Oh which reminds me- you guys wanna get together for another movie night?

Rose: Can we watch Peter Rabbit?

Rey: Uhh, sure?

Arm: Every time we watch it, she says that Thomas looks and acts exactly like me.

Rose: Especially the part where he starts kicking over all the displays  🤣

Arm: Shut up Rose

Rose: xDDD love you  😘

Rey: Alright, Peter Rabbit it is. And hey, Gwen’s not a third wheel anymore! :) Finn, Poe, you guys are invited too, wanna come?

Finn: Well...

Poe: This is insane. This is completely insane.

Ben: We’ll take that as a yes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About Phasma’s name change: I just got tired of writing Phasma 😂


	62. Movie Night (With A Secret Surprise)

Arm has started a chat room

Arm invited Book Nerds

Gwen: MOVIE NIGHT!!!!  🎬

Ben: Finn, Poe, Rose, where are you guys?

Rose: We’re coming! Finn and Poe were being all grumpy about coming.

Poe: Look, I don’t care if ‘Arm’ is the spy or ‘Ben’ is now a nice person or ‘Gwen’ is a member of Girlsquad. You guys are on different sides of the war, you should not have even met each other unless you were shooting blaster bolts at each other!

Rey: Well, to be fair...

Arm: We  _ were _ all trying to kill each other at first...

Ben: And then stuff happened...

Mitaka: And now we’re all friends!

Finn: I’m only here because Rose said there would be popcorn.

Gwen: YOU FOUND POPCORN!?!?!?!?

Rose: Darn it was supposed to be a surprise :)

Gwen: I’VE NEVER HAD POPCORN BEFORE, I’M SO EXCITED!!!!!!!

Rey: SAME!!!!!!!!

Arm: You actually brought popcorn!?!?! I haven’t had popcorn since I was like, 5...

Ben: 5 year old Arm that’s just adorable to picture.

Mitaka: P O P C O R N

Rose: Welp, the secret’s out...

Finn: I’ve actually never tried popcorn before, is it good?

Poe: YOU’VE NEVER TRIED POPCORN??? HOW???

Rey: Yea, you guys are definitely going to fit in here ;)

Arm: Honestly, I feel like we spend more of our time fangirling/fanboying (is that a word?) than actually reading.

Rose: Eh who cares.

Gwen: Okay but seriously, when are you guys getting here?

Rose: We’re right outside, open the door! I can’t balance the popcorn and the phone AND open the door.

Ben: Alright, I got it.

Rey: MOVIE MOVIE MOVIE MOVIE MOVIE!!!!

Mitaka: We’re all in the same room, why are we texting?

Arm: LET’S JUST START THE MOVIE!!!!!!


	63. Speeder Bikes

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Kaydel

Zorii: I’m bored. Let’s do something.

Kaydel: Raid the kitchen?

Zorii: Nah, we already did that.

Kaydel: Annoy Rose?

Zorii: She’s at movie night again.

Kaydel: uhh...oh! Let’s go hijack a speeder!

Zorii: YASSS

Kaydel: Okay but I can’t pilot.

Zorii: Don’t worry, I got this.

Kaydel: That makes me even more worried!

Zorii: Don’t be such a party crasher. Meet you by Poe’s X-wing in fifteen minutes- should be plenty of time for you to brush your hair  😋

Kaydel: Oh stop. Anyway, Poe’s on a mission.

Zorii: Fine. Kare’s X-wing.

Kaydel: She’s with Poe.

Zorii: The Falcon???

Kaydel: Rose, Rey, and Finn all took it to movie night. They’re watching Jurassic Park.

Zorii: ARE THERE ANY SHIPS LEFT IN THE RESISTANCE?!?!?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: Stormpilot?

Zorii: NOT THAT KIND OF SHIP!!!!!

Kaydel: how about we meet by the huge tree that I accidentally crashed a supply crate carrier into?

Zorii: Yes that works. In fifteen minutes.

Kaydel: Actually, I’m already there.

Zorii: Kaydel have I ever told you how much I hate you?

Zorii: Okay I’m- KAYDEL!!!!!!

Kaydel: Hehehehe

Zorii: DON’T JUMP OUT AT ME LIKE THAT!!!!!

Kaydel: okay, which speeder?

Zorii: Idc just pick a random one.

Kaydel: Ooh this one seems beat-up. if we crash it no one’ll notice.

Zorii: That one doesn’t look like it can fly.

Kaydel: Who cares. How do you start this thing?

Zorii: Chill you’re gonna blow the thing up. Let the professional handle this.

Kaydel: In case you’ve forgotten, Rose is watching Jurassic Park.

Zorii: I meant me!  😡

Kaydel: Fine fine whatever. Oh yea and i brought the porg.

Zorii: aww she’s so cuteeee!!!!!

Kaydel: I know!!!!

Zorii: Wait you brought her a helmet awww that’s adorable.

Kaydel: Alright. We’ve all got our safety gear. Les do this.

Zorii: *trains ;)


	64. Minor spoiler: they crashed

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Zorii

Poe invited Kaydel

Poe: Why is it that whenever something happens, it’s always you and the other girls who are to blame?

Kaydel: That is a very good question.

Poe: You stole a speeder and crashed it into a tree.

Zorii: Okay, the porg distracted me!

Poe: The tree then fell over and nearly crushed the remaining speeders.

Kaydel: To be fair, the tree was already pretty beat up.

Poe: From when you crashed a supply crate carrier into it.

Kaydel: ...yes. This is true.

Poe: I give up. I just give up.

Poe: Running a rebellion? Easy. Keeping track of a group of girls? Impossible.

Zorii: Well to be fair, you’re doing a good job of it. 

Zorii: We just don’t like to be controlled.

Poe: I don’t even know. Befriending First Order members? Hosting a glitter fight with FO leaders? Meeting up at a cantina for blue milk ice cream?

Kaydel: Oh I remember that. I still have the footage!

Zorii: YOU STILL HAVE THE FOOTAGE????

Kaydel: Yep!

Zorii: WE NEED TO SEND IT TO THE GIRLS WE WERE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!!!!!

Kaydel: I thought we agreed they’d kill us.

Zorii: WHO CARES!?!?!?!?

Poe: Of course. Of course you have  _ footage _ of the cantina date.

Zorii: *double date

Poe: Someone send help.


	65. ‘Secret’ Mission

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Nimi Chireen

Poe invited Rose Tico

Poe: You two’ve both been to Canto Bight, right?

Nimi Chireen: A long time ago, but yes.

Rose Tico: Yea.

Poe: Alright. I have an important mission for you two. It involves going to Canto Bight.

Zorii: You’re going to need a pilot. I’ll take the Falcon!

Rey: woah woah woah. No one is taking the Falcon anywhere. The hyperdrive’s broken.

Poe: It is? How soon can you fix it?

Rey: Maybe a day or two, if Kaydel can keep her porg out of the wiring.

Nimi Chireen: What’s the mission anyway?

Poe: We’ve located a force-sensitive by the name of Temiri Blagg. He lives on Canto Bight. I need you two to rescue and recruit him.

Rey: wait, WHAT?!?!? Poe, you found a force-sensitive? And didn’t tell ANYONE?

Poe: Well, it was classified information-

Rey: POE DAMERON. YOU KNOW FOR A FACT THAT I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND FORCE-SENSITIVES USING LUKE’S NOTES!!!!! CLASSIFIED MY-

Rose Tico: So glad I blocked vulgar language on this chat.

Zorii: Smart. Why?

Rose Tico: ‘Cause the second you two joined I knew someone was going to start fighting Poe.

Poe: Yes, but this was supposed to be a SECRET operation.

Rey: YEAH I FIGURED SINCE EVERYTHING YOU DO ENDS UP BEING SHIFTY AND/OR ILLEGAL

Nimi Chireen: Do they do this often?

Poe: Alright look, you can go on the mission! Besides, I just heard about this only a few minutes ago. He lives on Canto Bight, and he works in the fathier stables-

Rose Tico: OH SO NOW YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO PAY ATTENTION TO MY REPORT ON THE FACT THAT THERE ARE ENSLAVED CHILDREN WORKING IN THOSE STABLES!!!!!! I SUPPOSED NOW THAT YOU ACTUALLY  _ NEED _ ONE OF THEM YOU’LL ACTUALLY CARE!!!!!!

Zorii: To answer your question Nimi, only every day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Nimi Chireen is that pilot from TROS who tells Rey the Falcon’s back. That’s really the only part she had in the movie.


	66. Rescue Squad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EXECUTE CHAPTER 66!!!!!

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Rescue Squad

Rey: Why is everything ‘squad’ all the sudden? Girlsquad, Rescue Squad, Kitchen Squad...

Rose: Ahh, so nice to have my normal name back. Rose. Just Rose. Not ‘Rose Tico’. So fancy for absolutely no reason. Poe texts us using our first names, but then all the sudden he’s calling me ‘Rose Tico’. We’re on a first-name basis, and I’m the only Rose in the Resistance. Why add Tico? I mean there’s nothing wrong with my last name, I think it’s quite nice, but still. Just call me Rose.

Zorii: I really don’t think we needed to read all that. Hey, we should add Nimi to Girlsquad!

Nimi: Girlsquad?

Rey: It’s this group of girls we have. There’s Zorii, Kaydel Ko Connix, Rose, Jannah, Gwen Phasma....we’re just a group of girls who have all sorts of crazy and chaotic adventures.

Zorii: One time we raided the kitchen at 2 in the morning! And we set up a birthday party for Jannah! And we played Kiss, Marry, Kill! (That was a stupid idea. It got WAYYYY out of hand).

Nimi: Huh. Jannah’s party was fun. I met a really nice girl, she’s a stormtrooper, but she LOVES history. (We spent the whole party talking history. It was really fun).

Rey: Oh thank you so much for saying that  🖤🖤🖤🖤 Nimi I can’t thank you enough.

Nimi: ???

Rey: Okay so a lot of people despise everyone in the First Order, yea?

Nimi: Yeah. Uh...where is this going?

Rey: Well, we don’t think so. Gwen Phasma...is Captain Phasma. But she’s really nice and funny!

Nimi: Wait, you’re friends with Captain Phasma?

Rose: Yeah, kinda.

Nimi: Cool! No, I definitely don’t have a problem with people in the FO- I just don’t like their political approach.

Rose: Yeah, agree to disagree, right? Well, Poe and Finn fall into the ‘absolutely despise the FO’ category, and that’s why we’re usually fighting.

Nimi: Ahh. I would love to join Girlsquad if you guys are okay with it!

Zorii: Always excited to have a new member! Uhh one thing tho...

Nimi: Hmm?

Zorii: Okay so...I’m gonna do this real fast. Cause that works for bacta patches and stuff. ReyandRosearekindofdatingFOmembersRoseisdatingArmitageHuxandReyisdatingKyloRenandthey’rebothactuallyprettynicebutitdoestakeabitofgettingusedtopleasedon’tfreakout.

Rose: Zorii. I knew what you were going to say, and i still can’t make sense of that mess.

Rose: What Zorii tried to say was that Rey and I are dating FO members.

Nimi: Huh.

Rose: I am dating General Hux. Rey is dating Kylo Ren.

Nimi: Huuuuuuhhhhh...

Zorii: It takes some getting used to :)

Rey: Guys is anyone even coming because I’ve been sitting in the Falcon and waiting for you guys to get here so we can leave for Canto Bight.


	67. Rescue Squad (cont.)

Rey: Welcome to Canto Bight everyone.

Rose: Ugh I still hate this stupid city.

Nimi: Oh, the lights are so pretty though...

Zorii: How are we going to find Temiri?

Rey: Rose knows where the fathier stables are. (Rose you do know where they are, right?)

Rose: Yeah. I mean last time we sorta found them by accident...but the racetrack is pretty easy to spot.

Zorii: I for one know that I will get lost the second I step off this ship. I will stay here and pick you up if you run into trouble.

Rose: Which we undoubtedly will.

Nimi: Okay. Everyone has a device, weapon, and some sort of proof that we’re here to help instead of hurt?

Rey: Aye aye, captain :)

Rose: Yep.

Nimi: Same. Let’s do this.

Rey: Alright. Let’s split up here. One person goes one way, two people go the other way.

Nimi: I’ll take the left. You two get the right.

Rey: Okay. If you need backup, let us know.

Zorii: And if you need to get out quickly, tell me.

Nimi: Nothing so far.

Rose: I hate this. We let the fathiers run free, and they just captured more. Someone should stop this. Or at least give the fathiers better living conditions.

Nimi: Maybe if the Resistance wins we can help them.

Rey: If the Resistance wins...it’s really scary. What’ll happen when the war’s over. I mean, if the First Order wins, we’ll probably all be killed. If the Resistance wins, all the First Order leaders will be killed. But we’re friends with so many of them. It’s just...weird. Like, while the war’s on, we can all text and plan to meet up with our FO friends on hidden planets, or host a book club together. But when the war’s over...

Rose: Yeah. Like...imagine Gwen having to give the order to execute us. She wouldn’t want to do it. But she’d have to, cause she’s FO and we’re Resistance.

Nimi: Maybe we could all come to a peaceful agreement. Then we wouldn’t have any mass killings.

Zorii: Poe compromising with the FO? Not likely. You’ve seen what he’s like when he talks about them.

Rey: We’re working on it. He and Finn watched the movie with us the other day. They were...guarded. But they had a good time. I think. Well, they enjoyed the movie, just not the other viewers.

Zorii: They’ll get used to it eventually. I hope.

Nimi: Ugh boys are so stubborn sometimes.

Rey: xD I know right?

Zorii: What do you mean sometimes?

Nimi:  🤣 sorry Zorii

Rey: Uhh guys it’s been a while since Rose spoke up...

Nimi: Uh oh. Rose, where are you?!?!?!

Rose: I’m fine.

Rey: Oh thank the force, I thought you’d disappeared! Don’t run off on me like that!

Rose: Sorry!

Rose: We’ve got a problem though.

Zorii: What do you mean we’ve got a problem?

Rose: They’re huddled at the back of a fathier stall, they seem terrified.

Nimi: They?

Rose: There’s three kids.


	68. A (Not Very) Stealthy Escape

Rey: Guys, I don’t have the heart to separate them.

Rose: Neither do I.

Nimi: I’m coming!

Rose: No, it’s fine. We’ll meet you at the ship.

Rey: There’s three of them. Temiri Blagg, the boy we’re supposed to recruit. Arashell Sar, a girl. And Oniho Zaya, another boy.

Rose: What do we do?

Nimi: Poe said to bring back Temiri Blagg. He never said to bring back ONLY Temiri.

Zorii: Nimi, you’re gonna fit right in at Girlsquad :)

Rose: I’m gonna ask him what our mission is. If he says Temiri, we bring all three. If he says only Temiri...

Zorii: To be fair, when have we ever listened to what Poe said?

Rey: Another good point.

Rose: Okay. He said (and I quote) ‘Find Temiri Blagg and recruit him for the Resistance’.

Nimi: Yes!!!

Zorii: Oh good. I’m not in the mood to be yelled at by Poe twice in a week.

Rey: Twice? You’re on a roll, girl!

Nimi: Zorii can you let me in the ship?

Zorii: Oh, sorry!

Nimi:  😁👍

Rose: We’re coming, it’s just taking a while to convince the kids.

Nimi: Show them your necklace? It’s pretty widely known that your planet was used as target practice.

Rey: Actually, Temiri seems to know Rose. Arashell and Oniho don’t like the lightsaber. And they seem angry at Temiri for trusting Rose.

Rose: Umm I think they’re speaking in code?

Nimi: Must be a different language?

Rose: I dunno. I’ve never head this language before- it doesn’t even sound remotely familiar.

Nimi: Maybe they made it up- my friends and I made a secret language when we were kids.

Zorii: Ohhhhh that makes sense. None of us had friends when we were little  🤷♀️

Rey: Okay, Temiri trusts us both. Oniho keeps talking really fast and pointing at the lightsaber. We’re not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Arashell is listening to them argue and looking extremely over it.

Zorii: xDDD poor kid probably has to hear this every day.

Nimi: Um, we’ve got another problem.

Rose: Uh oh. What?

Nimi: Bargwill Tomder’s coming. He’s the guy who runs the stable.

Rey: Huh that actually got them to trust us.

Nimi: Meet back at the ship- I’ll cause a distraction!

Zorii: No wait, I can pick you up!

Rey: Zorii, if you damage the Falcon-

Zorii: Okay fine I’m staying where I am

Rose: ZORII OPEN THE DOOR!!!!!!!!

Zorii: Agh which button was it again?

Rey: ZORII!!!!!!

Nimi: ZORII!!!!

Rey: HIT THE BIG GREEN ONE!!!!!

Zorii: Oh okay...

Rose: NO THAT’S THE ALARM!!!!!!

Rey: THE OTHER GREEN ONE!!!!!!

Zorii: There’s a lot of green ones!

Rey: NIMI HIT THE BIG GREEN BUTTON!!!!!

Nimi:  👍

Rose: Thank you. Zorii, you are never piloting for us again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MANDALORIAN SEASON TWO STARTS OCTOBER 30!!!!!! (But DON’T try to find a trailer online yet or you will be rickrolled)


	69. Poe, I’m Geniunely Sorry You Have To Deal With This

Nimi has started a chat room

Nimi invited Poe

Nimi: We’re heading back to base.

Poe: You brought Temiri?

Nimi: ...yes.

Poe: Oh no.

Poe: I should have known those girls would somehow find a way to screw this up.

Poe: What did you do this time?

Nimi: Zorii says to tell you that we did exactly what you asked.

Poe: You do have Temiri? On the ship? With all of you?

Nimi: Rey says to say yes, but not anything else.

Nimi: Oh and Rose just said I shouldn’t have written that.

Poe: *takes a deep breath*

Poe: ZORII ROSE AND REY, WHAT DID YOU DO!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Nimi: ...

Nimi: ...uh

Nimi: We brought Temiri.

Poe: AND????

Nimi: Two other slave kids.

Poe: WHAT????

Poe: I TOLD YOU SPECIFICALLY TO RESCUE AND RECRUIT TEMIRI BLAGG!!!!!!!

Nimi: Yes, and we ended up recruiting three people instead of one, so you can take that back Flyboy.

Poe: ZORII GIVE NIMI HER PHONE BACK

Nimi: Oh no I’ve been discovered.

Nimi: *runs*

Poe: JUST GET BACK HERE SO I CAN ACTUALLY TALK TO ALL OF YOU

Nimi: Imma drop another tree on BB-8 if you don’t stop screaming at us over nothing.

Poe: REY GIVE NIMI HER PHONE

Nimi: Or maybe just drop the tree on Poe, that would solve things. Beebee’s innocent.

Poe: ROSE. PHONE TO NIMI.

Nimi: Why is Mr Poe so angry?

Poe: DID YOU GIVE THE PHONE TO TEMIRI????

Nimi: My name’s Arashell. Do you always write all capital letters?

Poe: CAN I JUST SPEAK WITH NIMI FOR ONE MINUTE?!?!?!?!?!?

Nimi: Okay, this is Nimi. We’re landing at base now.

Poe: Good. I’m coming to meet you guys.

Nimi: Uhh one sec, we’re trying to open up the hidden floor compartment to hide in.


	70. Welcome To The Resistance

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Canto Bight Trio

Rey: Hi Arashell, Temiri, Oniho! If you guys get this, please reply!

Arashell: Hi?

Temiri: What is this?

Rey: Poe asked me to see if your phones worked.

Rey: We use the texting option a lot for fun and to talk about missions.

Oniho: They work.

Rey: So...welcome to the Resistance?

Rey: Wait, one sec...

Rey invited Rose

Rose: Hi :)

Rose: I’m Rose. Well i guess you already know me Temiri :)

Temiri: ya

Rose: Do you still have the ring?

Temiri: Yep!

Arashell: Is that the flower-person?

Oniho: No duh Arashell  🙄

Arashell: Did you really help the fathiers run away?

Rose: Yeah, and we took off their harnesses so no one could ride them again.

Arashell: Woah! And you rode one?

Rose: Yep.

Arashell: Cool!

Oniho: Arashell LOVES animals

Rey: Our friend Jannah rides orbaks

Arashell: Orbaks?

Rey: I can send you a picture...

Arashell: JANNAH IS SO COOL!!!!!!

Temiri: *facepalms* really Arashell? Really?

Rose: Here, we can add Jannah...

Rose invited Jannah

Jannah: Oh hi. What’s this?

Jannah: Who’s Arashell, Temiri, and Oniho?

Jannah: Wait, lemme guess. More FO members?

Rey: No. They used to live on Canto Bight. They’re now living here.

Jannah: Oh. Sry  ☺️ Welcome to the Resistance you guys!

Arashell: Do you really ride orbaks?

Jannah: Yeah  😁

Arashell: AWESOME.

Temiri: Arashellll! You’re embarrassing all of us!

Jannah: lol it’s fine- maybe I could teach you how to ride them sometime, Arashell! So you guys are joining the Resistance?

Oniho:  🤷♂️

Rey: Well you’re free to join if you want. Or you can go back. Or you can move to a different planet. Your choice.

Arashell: Guys guys guys let’s stay here!!!!

Oniho: Uh-huh. And fight in a war.

Temiri: But these are the good guys! Like Luke Skywalker!

Rose: Rey’s met Luke

Rey: Rose stop. He basically ignored me the whole time.

Temiri: YOU MET LUKE SKYWALKER?

Rey: Well, very briefly

Temiri: I told you Oniho! She’s a Jedi! And they’re the good side!

Arashell: Come on. We can’t go back to Canto Bight.

Oniho: Okay fine fine.

Jannah: Welcome to the Resistance :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Rey was supposed to send a picture of an orbak to the whole group, but I couldn’t figure out how to add images. If anyone knows how to, or if there’s a tutorial somewhere, could you please explain how/explain where to find a tutorial?


	71. Girlsquad Expansion

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited Girlsquad

Rose: Okay guys, this is an important meeting. I need all of you to be on your best behavior.

Rose: Kaydel, Zorii, I’m talking to you.

Zorii: Who me?  🥺

Rose: We may have two new members by the end of this.

Kaydel: Aye aye, captain Rose! *salutes*

Rey invited Nimi

Rose invited Arashell

Nimi: Hi. Oh, is this that Girlsquad group you told me about?

Zorii: Yep!

Arashell: ...Hi?

Rey: Hi Arashell :)

Arashell: What’s this?

Kaydel: We’re just a group of girls who like to have fun and be crazy. And we get yelled at by Poe a lot.

Arashell: Does Poe always write in all capital letters?

Zorii: Some days it feels like he does.

Jannah: He only writes like that when he’s yelling at us. Which happens a lot.

Gwen: Mostly because of me.

Nimi: Are you Gwen Phasma?

Gwen: Yea. You’re that pilot girl who likes history?

Nimi: agh I’ve been discovered  😊

Gwen: Oh, which reminds me- there’s someone else I want to introduce y’all to.

Rey: Another new Girlsquad member?  😃

Gwen: Yep!

Gwen invited Madeline

Madeline: Heya! Is this Girlsquad?

Rose: Yeah

Madeline: Cool! I’m Madeline. Just call me Maddy :)

Jannah: Hi Maddy! Thinking about joining Girlsquad?

Madeline: Yeah, Captain Phasma told me about it. Gwen, sorry. Bad habit!

Kaydel: You with the FO?

Madeline Ya- I’m a stormtrooper!

Jannah: Hey, same!

Rey: Wow, looks like Girlsquad hit a growth spurt 😁

Nimi: Haha yeah- I’m definitely joining! This looks fun and chaotic.

Zorii: Just be ready to get yelled at by Poe a lot!

Arashell: Wait...I thought you said the First Order was the bad side?

Rey: Well...about that.

Rose: Yes but actually no.

Arashell: They’re good but bad?

Kaydel: That’s actually pretty accurate.

Jannah: Gwen and Maddy are with the First Order, which is the bad team, but they’re good people.

Arashell: But Poe said we shouldn’t be friends with them?

Nimi: I think he was trying to stop you from turning into us :) He thinks the First Order is evil, but he also thinks Gwen and Maddy are evil.

Madeline: Yea I’ve heard a lot about Poe

Madeline: Is it true that you guys are dating FO members or is Gwen just pulling my leg?

Rose: No that’s definitely true  😁

Arashell: Wait what?

Zorii: You didn’t tell!?!?!?!?

Rey: uhh no

Zorii: *chuckles evilly*

Rose: Oh force don’t corrupt her Zorii!

Kaydel: So once upon a time Rose bit some guy and now they’re dating.

Gwen: Okay that made no sense. Here’s what actually happened. Rose and General Hux used to hate each other, but they eventually realized that they liked each other, and even though they were on opposite sides of the war, they could still be friends. And then after that, they realized that they loved each other, and we’re all waiting to be invited to the wedding.

Kaydel: Also, once upon a time, Kylo Ren captured Rey and now they’re dating as well.

Gwen: That still made no sense. Here’s what actually happened.

Gwen: umm what did happen?

Rey: honestly it’s all very confusing.

Zorii: Also, one time we raided the kitchen at two in the morning and adopted a porg, who is now our child.

Jannah: *Zorii and Kaydel’s child

Jannah: Actually I ship

Rose: I KNOW RIGHT!!!


	72. Orbaks

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: Wow we grew.

Nimi: There are now 9 of us if I counted correctly.

Zorii: Let’s go do something stupid!!!!

Rey: Let’s cause some chaos *chuckles evilly*  😈

Rose: You know I kind of hope we’d get a day or two of peace.

Kaydel: When Girlsquad meets? Not a chance.

Zorii: Let’s play Kiss, Marry, Kill again!

Rey: NO!!!!

Gwen: Let’s go spam Poe.

Nimi: He already yelled at me twice this week.

Jannah: I’ve got an idea. Let’s meet up on some planet...and ride orbaks.

Arashell: Y E S

Rose: Yes!

Maddy: Uhh I can’t ride.

Kaydel: Yah same I will probably crash.

Zorii: You can ride with me Kaydel!  🖤

Rey: I don’t know if that’s safe.

Gwen: It’s not

Jannah: Okay I can teach you how to ride :)

Rose: We’d have to meet on Kef Bir ‘cause that’s where the orbaks live.

Nimi: Race you there!

Rey: Wait wait wait, we don’t all have our own ships.

Maddy: I can take a TIE fighter.

Gwen: Same.

Nimi: I’ve got an X-Wing

Zorii: I’ve got a Y-Wing.

Rey: Everyone else, meet by the Falcon in three minutes. Unless Kaydel has to brush her hair, then we will meet in fifteen minutes.

Kaydel: Actually I’m riding with Zorii.

Rose: *whispers* I ship

Jannah: *whispers* I do to

Zorii: *flips off Rose and Jannah*

Rey: Really you guys? Really?

Arashell: What does ‘flips off’ mean?

Rey: See and this is what I mean. Y’all are corrupting Arashell.

Maddy: I think anyone who joins Girlsquad is doomed to become corrupted.

Arashell: Where’s the Falcon anyway?

Gwen: just look for the group of noisy and chaotic girls.


	73. Poe gotta question

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Zorii

Zorii: Hey Flyboy. What did we do this time?

Poe: ...Surprisingly enough, nothing.

Zorii: Guess that means you haven’t looked for the Falcon lately.

Poe: Wait, what?

Zorii: Huh? Oh, nothing.

Poe: You know what, never mind.

Poe: I had a question.

Zorii: Ask away.

Poe: So you’re always hanging out with Rose and Rey, right?

Zorii: Ya, no duh

Poe: And they’re dating...well, you know.

Zorii: Yep.

Poe: So...Jannah’s always teasing about weddings and stuff. Do you know if...if mean anytime soon...

Zorii: Rose says no. Rey doesn’t talk about it.

Poe: Ahh.

Zorii: If this is about you asking for advice about proposing to Finn, then you can just ask.

Poe: Yeah it actually is- HEY WAIT A MINUTE HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT!?!?

Zorii: Kaydel knows all the gossip. ALL the gossip.

Poe: Okay I should’ve seen that one coming. So yes. Have you seen Finn lately? Has he ever talked about...you know?

Zorii: I haven’t seen Finn lately, but he and Jannah hang out a lot.

Poe invited Jannah

Jannah: ???

Zorii: Just read it

Jannah: ...

Jannah: Oh. Finn talks about you a lot. He’s only mentioned ‘you know’ once, but I think he’d say yes. So when r u asking?

Poe: Umm. Next week maybe?

Jannah:  👍 You got this Poe!!!

Jannah: But serious, are we invited to the wedding?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT’S CANON


	74. OH MY GOD IT’S HAPPENING

Kaydel has started a chat

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: GET DOWN TO THE MESS HALL NOW

Rey: Huh?

Rose: I’m already there. What’s going on?

Kaydel: STORMPILOT

Jannah: *shrieks*

Zorii: STORMPILOT!!!!!!!!!

Rose: NO YOU’RE KIDDING!!!!!

Kaydel: JUST GET DOWN HERE I’M SERIOUS!!!!!

Nimi: Storm pilot?

Gwen: OH MY GOD ITS HAPPENING?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: EVERYBODY STAY ****** CALM!!!!

Rey: NO MEME REFERENCES THIS IS VERY SERIOUS!!!!!!

Nimi: What is Storm pilot?

Rose: The romantic pairing of Finn and Poe

Maddy: Oh that makes sense.

Gwen: I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY FOR A LONG TIME

Gwen: SOMEBODY GET A VIDEO!!!!!

Rey: I’m videoing, I’ll send it to you!

Kaydel: WOW IT’S REALLY HAPPENING

Jannah: I’m so proud of them.  😭

Zorii: I know, right? It’s too adorable, I can’t  😭

Rose: SOMEBODY GET THE GUYS IN HERE

Rey invited Book Nerds

Arm: What is- WAIT STORMPILOT IS HAPPENING?!?!?!?

Gwen: YASSS!!!!!

Ben: wow I think this is the first time we all agree on a ship.

Rose: I thought we all agreed that Peeta/Gale was obviously superior.

Mitaka: GUYS GUYS GUYS DETAILS!!!!!

Jannah: I...I’m speechless.

Kaydel: Oh, it’s beautiful.

Nimi: What’s he saying, I can’t hear!!!!

Zorii: Knowing Poe, something cringy.

Rey: Finn’s loving it though.

Rose: They’re both crying.

Kaydel: I can’t it’s too adorable  😭

Jannah: Alright I’m going closer.

Jannah: *gasps*

Jannah: Guys.

Ben: WHAT?!?!?!

Gwen: WHAT’S HAPPENING!??!?!?

Arm: Did he...

Jannah: He said yes.

Gwen: *SCREAMS*

Rey: ZORII GET THE GLITTER BLASTERS OUT!!!!

Zorii: I BROUGHT THEM WITH ME!!!!!

Kaydel: Oh wow Zorii just showered them with glitter.

Arm: I feel bad that stuff takes hours to get off

Rose: There’s a plus! Poe’s too happy to yell at her!

Maddy: Wow.

Mitaka: Hey, are we invited to this wedding?


	75. Book Club Reunited

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus Chapter because...MANDALORIAN SEASON TWO TRAILER WAS RELEASED TODAY!!!!!! This is the way!

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Book Nerds

Gwen: Okay, it’s been so long since we had a meeting.

Rose: Stormpilot happened.

Gwen: So where’s everyone in the book?

Rose: Stormpilot. Happened.

Mitaka: Yes, we know.

Arm: The audio for the video literally shatters your ears. It’s just twenty minutes of screaming and squealing and laughing and repeatedly saying Stormpilot.

Ben: Did you actually start crying halfway through the video?

Rey: Yes  🤣

Rose: We were all crying xD

Gwen: As AWESOME as that was, where’s everyone in the book? Also, where are Finn and Poe?

Rey: I took them off cause they’re busy

Arm: Mhmm BUSY

Rose: *chokes on caf* ARM  🤣

Ben: I finished

Mitaka: I finished

Arm: Finished

Rey: Done

Rose: I have like one page lmho

Gwen: Okay I’m also done

Ben: So...when are we getting together to watch the movie?

Arm: Wait are Finn and Poe finished?

Rose: Yea they’re just BUSY

Rey: You guys better not do this when Arashell is on a chat with us

Mitaka: Is she gonna join book club?

Rey: No she’s like 10 or 11 or something we don’t need you corrupting her!

Gwen: I think it’s too late for that, she’s hanging out with Zorii and Kaydel while we meet.

Rose: Oh no.

Rose: Hey speaking of Zorii and Kaydel...I ship them so hard has anyone else noticed how they’ve been always watching each other when the other isn’t looking and hanging out a TON lately?

Rey: Yes

Gwen: Definitely.

Ben: Kaydel and Zorii...were those the two girls who were hugging in the video you sent?

Gwen: WAIT WHAT

Gwen: IMMA GO CHECK

Arm: OMIGOD THAT’S THEM!!! THEY’RE HUGGING!!!

Mitaka: This is slightly pathetic but also really fun

Mitaka: Aren’t they allowed to hug? They’re friends.

Arm: *pats Mitaka’s head* quiet child the adults are speaking

Rey: I think if they actually did get together then the entire Resistance would be doomed

Rose: xD I know right those two are the most mischievous pranksters in the galaxy

Ben: Well at least we’re safe in the FO  😝

Gwen: If you seriously believe that then you don’t know Kaydel and Zorii. Nowhere is safe when it comes to those two.


	76. New Ship But There’s No Name For It Yet So The Chapter Title Can’t Be The Name Of The Ship

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Book Nerds

Poe: SAVE ME

Gwen: What?

Ben: Rey, Rose, what did you do this time?

Rose: We’re actually innocent for once

Arm: Sure  🙄

Rey: No we actually haven’t been doing anything. Unless you count spying on Zorii and Kaydel.

Ben: Ahh yes one of the few ships we all agree on. Anything new?

Poe: THAT’S EXACTLY WHY SOMEONE NEEDS TO SAVE ME

Rose: ???

Mitaka: Are you okay?

Poe: NO!!!!! ZORII ASKED KAYDEL OUT ON A DATEEE

Rey: ... *screams*

Gwen: Oh force.

Arm: Someone get Jannah in here she ships it too

Mitaka invited Jannah

Jannah: What is going on here?

Rose: Zorii Bliss. Asked Kaydel Connix. On a kriffing DATE.

Jannah:  🤯

Ben: Exactly.

Ben: And now we’re all done for because they will probably get together and plot all of our demises

Gwen: Is that even the right way to use the word demise?

Rey: WHO CARES WE’RE ALL DOOMED

Rose: Though I do have to say, I that one coming.

Mitaka: We all did

Poe: I didn’t.

Arm: No one cares you’re not part of the awesome uh...shipping squad

Rey: *facepalms* really Hux?

Arm: Yes. Millicent is our mascot.

Rose: OOH I’M JOINING

Gwen: Same. No one can resist that cat.

Mitaka: If Gwen and Millicent are joining than this sounds like it will be the most adorable club in the galaxy

Ben: Aww Mitaka called Gwen adorable

Rey: And the cat

Ben: And Gwen

Rey: Copaani mirshmure'cye?

Gwen:  😳 Oof

Arm: ???

Gwen: She asked if he wanted a smack in the face, if I understood that correctly.

Ben: You did

Poe: 1. Hugs, no one cares about your cat. 2. Can we get back to important matters, like the fact that we’re all doomed?

Rose: Okay, 1, we all adore Arm’s kitty and if you insult her or Arm, we will all come after you. 2, yea...we’re all doomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’ve discovered that I lowkey ship Kaydel and Zorii, which you may have already known if you read the other Adventures Of Girlsquad fic. And then this happened.


	77. House Quiz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter focuses a lot on Harry Potter houses. For anyone who hasn’t read Harry Potter, the four Houses (they’re basically like teams) are:  
> Gryffindor- the house of courage  
> Ravenclaw- the house of knowledge  
> Hufflepuff- the house of kindness  
> Slytherin- the house of cunning/ambition  
> Basically, a magical Sorting Hat looks inside your mind and assigns you to a House. Because Sorting Hats don’t exist in real life (as far as I know), people create quizzes that determine your House.

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Book Nerds

Gwen: Which Harry Potter house is everyone in?

Rose: Idk

Ben: You mean like which House would we want to be in? Cause it’s Slytherin.

Gwen: No I mean like have you ever taken one of those quizzes to find out which House you’d be in

Rey: Those exist???

Gwen: Yep. Just look up Harry Potter House quiz or something like that.

Mitaka: WOW THEY DO EXIST!

Arm: Which House are you?

Gwen: :) I’m not telling until all of you take the quiz.

Rose: Already started.

Rey: Hmm...students have stolen Luna Lovegood’s books and clothes again. What do you do? Oh that’s easy.

Arm: Your friend is failing Care of Magical Creatures. What advice do you offer them? Well that depends. If Rose or Gwen or Mitaka is failing, then I help them study. But if Ben’s the one failing then I leave him to deal with it on his own.

Ben: Wow thanks Hugs

Ben: Umm what’s a Mudblood?

Mitaka: *gasps*

Arm: *gasps*

Gwen: *scandalized* DON’T SAY THAT WORD!!!!!

Ben: Oh force what did I do this time

Rey: *in Hermione voice* Mudblood’s a really foul name for someone who’s Muggle-born. Someone like me. It’s not a term one usually hears in civilized conversation.

Rose: Though I think we left civilized behind a LONG time ago

Ben: Agh sorry guys I didn’t know

Arm: Lmho its fine

Mitaka: Ummm some of these questions are extremely deep

Gwen: Yea that’s what all of mine were like

Poe: Just seeing this now- what’s going on?

Ben: We’re taking a quiz to find out which Harry Potter House we’re in.

Rose: Ooh I think I’m almost done!

Poe: Huh. Guess I’ll try too...

Rey: Okay I have one question left

Arm: Before we figure out who got what, what do you think everyone WILL get?

Rose: Hmm...Arm, Gryffindor. Ben, Gryffindor. Rey, Hufflepuff. Gwen...Slytherin. Poe, Gryffindor. Finn, Hufflepuff. Mitaka, Gryffindor.

Gwen: WOW THANKS TICO

Rey: Actually I’m gonna have to agree with her. Slytherin is known for ambition, and you worked hard to go from living on a backwater planet to one of the most well-known First Order members in the galaxy.

Gwen: Wow, thanks Tico  😭🖤

Ben: I think she’s trying to steal your gf Arm

Ben: Anyway...hmm. Rose, Hufflepuff. Arm, Slytherin. Rey, Hufflepuff. Gwen, Gryffindor. Mitaka, Ravenclaw. Poe...umm I’ve only met you like once in real life so I really don’t know. I guess Slytherin. Finn, Gryffindor.

Poe: Arm, Slytherin. Ben, Slytherin. Gwen, Slytherin. Mitaka, Slytherin. Rose, Hufflepuff. Rey, Hufflepuff. Finn, Gryffindor.

Arm: Mitaka, Ravenclaw. You’re a smart guy. I wouldn’t be surprised if you end up running the FO with us in a few months. Rose, Hufflepuff. That one’s easy. You make friends with everyone you meet. Ben, Gryffindor. But like one of the more chill Gryffindors, not the ones who run straight into danger...you know what never mind, I take that back, you’re one of those Gryffindors who runs straight into danger. Poe, Slytherin. You’re ambitious, and a great leader. Finn, Hufflepuff. Cause Rose told me he’s a literal cinnamon roll. Rey, Slytherin. Again with the whole ambition thing, and well anyone who makes a dark Hermione costume is ending up in Slytherin. Gwen, Gryffindor. She’s the bravest soldier in the FO. She’s also a great leader, and she’s taught thousands of stormtroopers how to fight.

Rey: Wow that was a whole paragraph. Okay...Mitaka, Ravenclaw. Rose, Hufflepuff. Ben, Ravenclaw. Arm...Gryffindor. Poe, Gryffindor. Gwen, Slytherin. Finn...Hufflepuff lmho he is a cinnamon roll.

Gwen: Oh yea, congrats Poe! We all saw the video of you and Finn!

Poe: Thanks  😁 Wait...there’s a VIDEO?

Arm: Yeah?

Poe: Of course they took a video...

Gwen: Uhh I really don’t know what I think about everyone’s Houses.

Mitaka: Same I’m gonna finish the quiz now.

Rose: What House would Millie be in???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Which House do you think everyone will get? :)


	78. And The Results Are In!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter, so I may post a second chapter today.

Gwen: Okay, what did everyone get?

Rose: No, you first!

Gwen: Fine. I got Slytherin.

Rose: YES I CALLED IT!!!!!

Gwen: Shut up Tico

Rose: I got Hufflepuff  😁

Rose: Never really understood why everyone seems to hate that House

Poe: YES!!!!!!! GRYFFINDOR!!!!!!

Mitaka: Oh cool, I’m a Ravenclaw!

Ben: Gryffindor. Does this mean I have to deal with Poe the whole year?

Arm: 7 years, actually.

Poe: Can I switch Houses?

Arm: sLyThErIn

Gwen: You’re a SnAkE

Arm: ssssSSSSSsssssSS

Ben: ???

Arm: *hissing intensifies*

Rey: SLYTHERIN!!!!!!!  🐍

Gwen: YES!!!!!!

Rose: :(

Rey: ROSE YOU’RE AN HONORARY SLYTHERIN NOW!!!!!!!

Rose: :D

Mitaka: Can we just assume that Finn’s in Hufflepuff then?

Poe: Yea.

Mitaka: Alright, but seriously, what about Millicent?

Arm: Hufflepuff

Gwen: The first time we all agree on something


	79. Squad Count

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter was really short, so I’m gonna post an extra one today :)

Nimi has started a chat room

Nimi invited Everyone

Nimi: Okay. Just to check in, how many squads do we currently have?

Gwen: Girlsquad!  😜

Kaydel: Kitchen Squad

Zorii: Rescue Squad

Arm: Shipping Squad- WE ARE A THING!!!!!

Ben: But we can never agree on any ships

Arm: SHUT UP SOLO

Arashell: Stable Squad  😁

Rey: ooh a new squad- who’s in it?

Oniho: Me, Arashell, and Temiri

Jannah: Animal Squad! Arashell and I started it, feel free to join!

Mitaka: Book Club, I guess we’re technically a squad.

Ben: Glitter Battle Squad?

Rose: Oh that was fun

Finn: Bromance Squad

Poe: YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE ABOUT THAT

Gwen: aww they made their own squad

Rey:  🎵 BROMANCE 🎵

Gwen: Oh no. Here we go again with the musical.

Arm:  🎵 NOTHING REALLY GAY ABOUT IT 🎵

Ben:  🎵 NOT THAT THERE’S ANYTHING WRONG WITH BEING GAY 🎵

Rose:  🎵 BROMANCE, SHOULDN’T BE ASHAMED OR HIDE IT 🎵

Mitaka:  🎵 I LOVE YOU IN THE MOST HETEROSEXUAL WAY 🎵

Poe:  🎵 ...I LOVE YOU BRO 🎵

Finn:  🥰 I love you too Poe

Kaydel: The fluff is strong with this one

Zorii: Yea but you’re more adorable  😘

Nimi: Okay I see where you’re coming from- can I join the shipping squad?

Arm: As long as you’re okay with cats

Rose: Wow is there anyone in this chat who is still single?

Arashell: Yes and I am never dating anyone. Ever.

Oniho: *whispers* Temiri just got all upset

Oniho: *still whispering* I think he’s got a crush on Arashell

Temiri: ONIHO!!!!!

Rey: Welcome to the Shipping Squad, Oniho.

Jannah: Hey, where’s Maddy?

Gwen: She’s getting sleep like a normal person. It’s one in the morning where we are.

Arm: I’ve given up trying to ignore the incessant buzzing every time you send a text. Also, Millie was hungry.

Ben: We should have another squad dedicated to Millie and the porg

Kaydel: We named her Jessika.

Zorii: Like Jess Pava, ‘cause she seemed to really enjoy the speeder bike ride.

Rose: YOU TOOK HER ON THE SPEEDER BIKE!?!?!?!

Nimi: And the irresponsible parents award goes to Kaydel and Zorii

Arashell: I’m definitely joining the Millicent and Jessika squad!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Which squad (or squads) would you join?


	80. Pranking The FO

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Girlsquad

Gwen: Guys we need some help.

Jannah: You and Mitaka?

Maddy: No, Gwen and I!

Kaydel: Depends. What services do you require?

Gwen: Well...we’re gonna prank the FO

Zorii: I’M IN!!!

Kaydel: SAME!!!

Rey: Oh force someone warn Arm and Ben

Gwen: No wait don’t! We’re pranking them too!

Rose: Ooh what do you have planned?

Maddy: Well that’s the problem. Neither of us are good at pranks and stuff, cause we’ve never done it before.

Gwen: So we decided to ask the masters, Zorii and Kaydel, and the three who always get dragged along semi-reluctantly, Rose, Rey, and Jannah.

Maddy: And Nimi and Arashell, if you two are awake!

Nimi: Oh I’ve never pranked anyone

Arashell: Well...there was one thing that Temiri and I used to do...  😊

Maddy: OOH DETAILS

Arashell: We’d put fathier poo in all the racers’ footholds!

Jannah: YASS THAT’S GENIUS!!!!!

Maddy: But where are we going to get fathier poo...

Gwen: Not fathier poo.

Maddy: ???

Gwen: Millicent’s litter box.

Rey: I thought I’d never say this, but force save the First Order.

Rose: One time Paige and I drew the Resistance symbol on a First Order ship with spray paint...I’m sure we could think of some things to write.

Kaydel: BOW TO THE PORGS

Gwen: Kaydel, I wouldn’t write that to save my life.

Jannah: Caricatures.

Zorii: Gesundheit

Jannah: No, I meant they should draw caricatures. They’re basically pictures of people, but really distorted and cartoony. Do a caricature of Arm or something!

Maddy: OOH AND WE COULD DO IT IN THE MAIN DOCKING BAY WHERE EVERYONE WILL SEE IT

Gwen: Now THAT is a plan worthy of Kaydel and Zorii

Rey: New squad- mischief squad!

Zorii: Careful- we might actually start that

Jannah: Hate to quote Vader, but NOOOOOOOOOOO

Gwen: We’re also replacing the janitors’ soap/water with bubble bath hehehe

Kaydel: OOH CAN WE BORROW THAT?

Rose: NO!

Nimi: someone save us all


	81. The Next Day...

Ben has started a chat room

Ben invited Arm

Arm invited Girlsquad

Nimi: You just have us all under Girlsquad?

Arm: I added you all as Girlsquad so if something happens I can yell at you all without having to add nine separate people.

Zorii: Oh no...they’re evolving.

Arm: *takes deep breath*

Kaydel: Oh, here we go. This is what Poe does before he-

Arm: WHO ATTACKED THE FIRST ORDER!?!?!?!?!??!

Kaydel: -yells at us.

Arm: SOMEONE PRANKED THE FIRST ORDER LAST NIGHT!!!!! AND WHEN I THINK OF PRANKS, I THINK OF ONE GROUP!!!!

Jannah: Zorii and Kaydel?

Rey: No one in the Resistance did anything ‘cause we were all hanging out last night.

Arashell: I was with Temiri

Gwen: *gasps*

Rose: *sqeals*

Rey: *facepalms* probably shouldn’t have said that Arashell.

Arashell: Why?

Rey: Cause Gwen and Rose just found a new ship  🙄

Ben: Don’t be afraid, I ship it too

Rey: Oh no, here we go again...

Zorii: Okay first of all, I also ship. Second...you know what forget second, what were you two even doing?

Arashell: talking

Kaydel: Oh sure, TALKING

Nimi: KAYDEL THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THIS CHAT

Kaydel: You’re right. Sorry Arm, sorry Nimi. I won’t use words that you shouldn’t be learning until you get older.

Arm: UM GUYS GET BACK ON TOPIC- WHO PRANKED THE FO!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Rose: Well you already know its not anyone in the Resistance idiot!

Ben: I sense a disturbance in your relationship. As if a divorce is on the horizon.

Rose: WE’RE NOT EVEN MARRIED!!!!!!

Jannah: *smirks*

Zorii: SPILL YOUR SECRETS HORSE LADY

Jannah: *smiles mysteriously*

Kaydel: pLeAsE jAnNaH?

Jannah:  😏

Arm: WHO PRANKED THE FO!?!?!?!??!!?

Rose: WHO DO YOU THINK, NERFHERDER!?!?!?!

Rey: You two sound like Han and Leia

Gwen: Or Draco and Hermione

Maddy: Or Elizabeth and Darcy

Mitaka: Except Rose is currently Darcy.

Rey:  🤣🤣🤣

Nimi: How did you even get on here?

Mitaka: I saw Arm tapping at his screen furiously and assumed that he could only be doing one of two things: texting you, or trying to beat the next level of that Candy Crush game. Turns out it was the first one.

Zorii: *shrieks* ARM YOU PLAY CANDY CRUSH!?!?!?!?!

Arm: MITAKAAAAA!!!

Maddy: We are NEVER going to stop teasing you about this.

Rey: Okay, time to reveal yourselves, pranksters. Because honestly, I think Arm is about to explode, and we’re all just done with this conversation.

Arashell: Yea I gotta go in a few mins

Kaydel: So you can meet up with a certain someone?  😏

Ben: Poor third wheel Oniho  😭

Jannah: Ight Imma head out

Rose: Kaydel stop showing Jannah the memes

Rey: And stop corrupting Arashell. And Jannah. And whoever else you’re currently corrupting.

Zorii: Oh no we’ve been discovered. TIME TO GO UNDERGROUND!!!! *hides under blanket*

Kaydel: Make room for me!

Zorii: *scoots over to provide room for Kaydel and Jessika*

Nimi: All right, i really don’t want to get all tangled up in this shipping business...but who does everyone think will get married first because Gingerrose was at the top of my list and now it looks like they’re gonna break up  😭

Gwen: A good question- for another time. And now...

Maddy: Is time to reveal ourselves.

Arm: YOU!?!?!?!!

Gwen: Yep! We pranked the First Order last night!

Arm: ........

Ben: Gwen. Maddy.

Maddy: Yes?

Ben: run.


	82. Shipping Wars

Nimi has started a chat room

Nimi invited Everyone

Jannah: Oh hi! Everyone’s here! This should be chaotic and fun!

Nimi: Wait, I wanna do a cool opening summary.

Jannah: ooh fun!

Rey: *plays theme music* 

Mitaka: *points spotlight at Nimi* 

Gwen: *wonders where Mitaka even got the spotlight*

Nimi: As an enraged Arm chases Gwen and Maddy throughout the galaxy, attempting to punish them for pranking the First Order, Rose and Armitage’s romance seems a little shaky. Last we saw them, they were compared to Elizabeth and Darcy, and Ben saw a possible divorce in the future. BUT a new love story seems to be forming between young Arashell and her force-sensitive friend Temiri. However, Arashell and her best friend Jannah both deny this. Speaking of Jannah, the orbak-riding former stormtrooper seems to be hiding a secret- and while Zorii and Kaydel have been trying to find out what exactly that secret is, to the best of our knowledge they’ve had no luck. In fact, last we saw the two chaos queens, they were going into hiding after Rey discovered they were working to corrupt Jannah, Arashell, and a bunch of other people in the Resistance. All in all, it was very chaotic. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy another episode of Chat Wars!

Rose: Did you literally write all of that in like, two seconds?

Nimi: No, I’ve been working on it all day. I just copied and pasted it  😁

Ben: Impressive. Most impressive.

Poe: Why am I here and why is Nimi writing a huge paragraph?

Nimi: And today’s special guest is a very confused Poe, who has been busy both leading the Resistance and preparing for his wedding.

Rey: Jannah, what is your secret anyway?

Jannah: I’ll tell you later.

Kaydel: ZORII AND I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET YOU TO TELL US FOR A WEEK AND YOU JUST TELL HER AS SOON AS SHE ASKS!?!?!?!?!?!

Jannah: Fine I’ll tell all three of you!  😳

Arm: Why are we even here and where are Gwen and Maddy because I still can’t find them

Maddy: HAHAHAHA YOU’LL NEVER FIND USSSS!!!!!!!!

Arm: They’re at the Resistance base, aren’t they?

Poe: Why are they at the Resistance base!?!?!?!?!

Zorii: Umm....

Arm: Because they pranked the FO and I’m trying to kill them and whenever someone in the FO needs to hide from someone else in the FO, they usually hide at the Resistance base.

Poe: ...I don’t like it. I don’t agree with it. But I accept it.

Arashell: Why are we here anyway?

Nimi: Ahh yes, the true reason for this meeting. So, last episode of Chat Wars, I asked everyone who they thought would get married first (not including Stormpilot because well obvious reasons). And while this whole shipping business seems slightly dangerous...well this should get interesting.

Ben: Good luck. You’re gonna need it.

Poe: What is Stormpilot?

Mitaka: U and Finn

Poe: o h

Maddy: Alright...I was gonna say Gingerflower or Gingerrose or whatever the name was. But they do look like they’re gonna break up now. So I’m gonna have to say...Mitaka and Gwen.

Nimi: Ya I’m gonna go with them as well

Arm; Rey and Ben

Rose: Arashell and Temiri

Rey: You do realize they’re like...I don’t know how old are you Arashell?

Arashell: I dunno

Rey: My point is, Arashell is still a child.

Rose: SO??? DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH MY OTP?????

Ben: I thought your OTP was Gale/Peeta

Rose: SHUT UP SOLO

Nimi: Does this happen a lot?

Arm: Actually they hardly ever fight. Rose seems to be in a violent mood lately.

Rey: Kaydel and Zorii

Kaydel: Zorii and I

Jannah: You can’t say yourself!

Kaydel: FINE, Arm and Rose!

Poe: But Nimi said they were fighting like ‘Elizabeth and Darcy’?

Kaydel: You’ve never read Pride and Prejudice, have you?

Poe: No.

Zorii: I have to go with...Gwen and Mitaka

Jannah: Arm and Rose

Ben: Hmm...Arashell and Temiri

Ben: And I’m really only saying that bc Arm and Rose look like they’re gonna break up

Poe: Umm who is Maddy?

Gwen: She’s my fren

Maddy: I’m a stormtrooper  🙂

Poe: Okay...um...I don’t really know what’s going on here...but I guess Kaydel and Zorii

Gwen: Rey and Ben

Arashell: Um...Arm and Rose?

Mitaka: Rey and Ben.

Nimi: Okay, what’s the most popular ship?

Arm: We got three votes.

Gwen: We got three

Arashell: 2

Ben: 3

Zorii: HAHA WE GOT oh we only got two

Rey: To be fair you just started dating like a week or two ago

Kaydel: WE HAVE AS MANY VOTES AS THE CHILDREN DO!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: THE CHILDREN WHO HAVEN’T EVEN BEEN ON A DATE?!?!?!?!

Nimi: This shipping business is dangerous!


	83. Jannah’s Secret

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Zorii

Jannah invited Rey

Jannah invited Kaydel

Kaydel: Are you finally gonna tell us your secret?

Jannah: Yes, but you have to promise not to tell ANYONE else. I’m not supposed to know, and neither are you guys.

Rey: Ooh a juicy secret!  😁

Jannah: Okay, so remember when Rose called Arm and idiot, and then we all said they were gonna get a divorce?

Zorii: Yeah of course. And then Rose said they weren’t even married.

Jannah: Well, about that...

Rey: WAIT ARE THEY- DID THEY- WHAT?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: Of course they’re not. Rose woulda at least told me, I knew about her and Arm before any of you.

Zorii: Not to mention the fact that you seem to know all the gossip.

Rey: Come on Jannah, tell us!!!

Jannah: Arm’s gonna propose to Rose

Zorii: *SHRIEKS* REALLY!!!!!!!

Rey: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Kaydel: EVERYBODY STAY CALM

Jannah: Why do you always use that meme when someone’s proposing to someone else?

Kaydel: I HAVE NO CLUE

Zorii: GUYS WE GOTTA HACK INTO THE SECURITY CAMERAS AGAIN!!!!!

Rey: Again?

Jannah: Oh, about that...

Kaydel: NO DON’T TELL HER

Rey: Kaydel turn off caps lock

Zorii: Okay, but we seriously need to hack the security cameras. Anyone know where they’re meeting up for their next date?

  
Kaydel: They haven’t planned it yet

Rey: I could recommend this one place we found...it’s quiet and the people there don’t ask questions...and there’s lots of security cameras...though I have no clue why you require security cameras...

Jannah: YESS AND WE COULD INVITE GWEN AND MADDY TO COME WATCH WITH US!!!!!! OUR FIRST LIVE GIRLSQUAD MEETING WITH ALL 9 OF US!!!!!

Zorii: Nah I think that’d be way too crowded.

Kaydel: Let’s start a chat and invite everyone and we could watch and report!!!!!

Zorii: As long as it doesn’t turn into someone saying ‘PDA’ for twenty minutes straight.

Rey: Am I missing something???

Jannah: So that one time you were on a double date we hacked the security cams and watched you guys eat ice cream.

Zorii: *facepalms*

Rey: I’m honestly not surprised.

Kaydel: Huh that’s not what I expected you to say.

Rey: Just don’t tell Rose cause she seems determined to yell at everyone lately.

Jannah: It’s because Arm hasn’t met up with her in weeks, almost two months by now. She said he’s acting like he doesn’t even want to be around her anymore.

Kaydel: ...

Jannah: She told me last week. We were a mess- there were tissues everywhere. She thinks he’s ignoring her, but he’s just trying to, ya know, get ready and all.

Zorii: Oh no, poor Rose! I just thought she was in a mood...

Jannah: But you can’t tell anyone, and she can’t find out about it.

Rey: Wait, when is he gonna do it?

Jannah: I don’t know, whenever he and Rose stop fighting I guess lol

Rey: Ugh that’s gonna take a while.

Kaydel: Can we tell Arm that we know?

Jannah: No, he’s gonna kill us!!

Kaydel: So?

Zorii: Kaydel he may actually kill us if we tell him tho


	84. Stormpilot Wedding

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Everyone

Rey: ARMITAGE HUX AND ROSE TICO, I SWEAR IF YOU TWO FIGHT TODAY, ARM I WILL STEAL MILLICENT, AND ROSE YOU WILL FIND CAT POO IN YOUR PILLOW

Maddy: Why her pillow tho

Rey: idk

Rose: ...fine.

Arm: You wouldn’t steal Millie!

Rey: Try me.

Jannah: Please do- I wanna see Millicent again!

Mitaka: Noooooo I wanna keep Millie at the FO :(

Zorii: GUYS THAT’S NOT WHY I STARTED THIS CHAT

Gwen: Well then why did you?

Zorii: BECAUSE WE HAVE AN EMERGENCY

Mitaka: Is someone dying?

Nimi: Did Kaydel crash another ship?

Ben: Kaydel if you crashed the Falcon I’m going to kill you myself.

Rey: You’ll have to get in line behind...me, Poe, possibly Finn...maybe Gwen...

Maddy: Why Gwen?

Gwen: Cause she almost killed me when we were riding orbaks.

Maddy: Fair.

Nimi: Um...where’s Poe and Finn anyway?

Poe: Getting ready.

Maddy: So is Finn...okay with us coming and all?

Poe: Okay is a strong word...but I have to invite u guys :)

Arm: Poe, can I bring Millicent to the wedding? I don’t want to leave her in my room for so long, especially if the only people who know she exists are going to be at the Resistance base.

Poe: Yea, of course- as long as she’ll behave.

Gwen: Poe, Millicent is better behaved than all of us.

Zorii: GUYS. EMERGENCY.

Kaydel: It’s not an emergency.

Zorii: YES. IT. IS.

Rey: IS EVERY COUPLE GOING TO FIGHT RIGHT NOW

Gwen: No

Mitaka: Nope.

Ben: I don’t know, are we currently fighting or not?

Maddy: But seriously, what’s the emergency?

Zorii: KAYDEL PAINTED MY NAILS

Nimi: ...why is that an emergency?

Jannah: I’m so glad I’m single.

Arashell: Agreed.

Kaydel: I painted four nails purple with one gold one.

Gwen: OMIGOD SEND A PICTURE

Maddy: Aww, it’s too cute!

Zorii: It looks stupid

Rey: It actually looks really cute. Like what you used to wear on Kijimi

Nimi: She’s wearing a purple dress with it, and there’s gold trim around the neckline.

Gwen: Awwww

Zorii: NO. NOT AWWW, EWWW.

Maddy: Definitely awww

Arashell: wait, we’re supposed to dress up?

Mitaka: Yes

Nimi: Yea

Arashell: oh

Jannah: You didn’t dress up, did you?

Arashell: ...no?

Kaydel: ALL GIRLSQUAD MEMBERS MEET IN MY ROOM IN FIVE MINUTES OR LESS. WE HAVE AN ACTUAL EMERGENCY

Kaydel: GWEN, MADDY, WE’LL SEND YOU PICTURES

Ben: Will someone explain why Kaydel’s freaking out?

Arashell: I’m confused.

Rey: KAYDEL WHY ARE YOU DRAGGING ARASHELL DOWN THE HALLWAY

Rey: JANNAH, ROSE, STOP CHEERING HER ON

Rey: Oh force why do I even try

Mitaka: Wow, I feel bad for Poe now.

Kaydel: Girls, we have a fashion emergency. Arashell needs something to wear- ZORII DON’T YOU DARE PICK OFF THAT NAIL POLISH

Zorii:  😳

Arm: Zorii your girlfriend is scary.

Zorii: MY girlfriend??? Rose has basically been threatening to murder half the Resistance with her eyes!!!

Jannah: I am sooooo glad I’m single.

Kaydel: Back to what I was saying- Arashell needs something to wear.

Nimi: Everything here’s too big for her.

Gwen: If you find a dress, maybe you can cut part of the bottom off or something?

Nimi: oh that makes more sense

Jannah: Gwen, are you gonna wear your armor?

Gwen: I might, just to see if Kaydel has a heart attack.

Rey: Gwen!  😂

Rose: Kaydel, where did you even find all these clothes?

Kaydel: I raided an abandoned costume store once.

Nimi: Ooh I found one!

Maddy: DESCRIBE IT!!!!!!

Nimi: It’s a paler mint green with silver embroidery at the neckline. Um...it’s pretty long, with puffy short sleeves, and for some reason Jannah thinks it’s a good idea to cut the bottom off WHILE ARASHELL’S ACTUALLY WEARING THE DRESS

Rey: JANNAH BE CAREFUL WITH THOSE SCISSORS-

Jannah: They’re not scissors.

Zorii: Um Jannah what do you have?

Jannah: A knife!

Zorii: NO!

Gwen: Omigod this will never end well

Arashell: Does it look good?

Kaydel: Hmm...you need to do your hair!

Rey: I can braid it- JANNAH PUT THE KNIFE DOWN YOU’RE GOING TO POKE SOMEONE’S EYE OUT

Jannah: Aww, you’re no fun.

Mitaka: I...why do I feel like Jannah would be the kid who plays that game where you put your hand on the table and try to stab a knife into the spaces between your fingers?

Gwen: Oh I’m good at that one!

Gwen: I used to play that when I was a kid!

Ben: GWEN ARE YOU SERIOUS???

Gwen: Yep!

Nimi: Gwen...I don’t even know what to say right now.

Gwen: Sometimes we’d also use these rocks that were coated with poisonous lichen. If you stabbed yourself, there was a chance that you died from the poison (unless you told an adult in time).

Zorii: ...please don’t encourage my child to play with knives, even I draw a line somewhere.

Kaydel: Yea, no self-harm, Jannah. Don’t listen to your Aunt Gwen when she talks about playing with knives.

Jannah: Ok Mom  🖤

Rose: I-

Maddy: Uh-

Poe: NO PLAYING KNIFE GAMES AT THE WEDDING

Gwen: Fine...

Zorii: What about spin the bottle?

Poe: I’d tell you no but that would make you even more determined to do it.

Kaydel: I mean you’re not wrong.

Jannah: Omigod Arashell you look so cuteeee!!!!

Arashell:  😊

Nimi: Wait!

Maddy: Why?

Zorii: She had to put a hair clip in Arashell’s hair. It’s a little white flower.

Maddy: Awwww

Rey: Ok we’re coming out to meet u guys

Gwen: Where should we land?

Poe: Can you see the tree Kaydel destroyed?

Ben: Yes. It looks worse than it sounded when you guys talked about it.

Kaydel: Yea....

Poe: Ok, land between the Falcon and the black-and-orange X-wing.

Maddy: Will do.

Poe: And remember- DON’T LET ANYONE SEE YOU OR WE’RE ALL DEAD

Arm: I mean to be honest, no one in the Resistance has ever seen Gwen without her armor and helmet, no one has seen Maddy without her stormtrooper armor, and no one knows who Mitaka is (IN A GOOD WAY, MITAKA). Also Ben always wears a helmet. And...I have the cat to distract suspicious peoples.

Poe: Shut up Hux


	85. Peaceful...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I didn’t do a chapter where they’re at the wedding, just because I thought it would be kind of rude to Finn and Poe if everyone wasn’t paying attention and texting during the wedding. Instead, the story picks up again a day or two after the wedding, while Finn and Poe are taking a few days off from the war...leaving Girlsquad unsupervised at the Resistance base ;) Enjoy, and may the Force be with you!

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Everyone

Gwen: So what’s happening to the Resistance while Finn and Poe are away?

Nimi: Idk, there’s not gonna be any missions or anything it should be pretty peace- KAYDEL WHERE ARE YOU GOING WITH THAT SPRAY PAINT?!?!?!?!?

Ben: Peaceful

Zorii: Kay, you dropped one

Kaydel: I know- wanna help???

Zorii: Sure, why not?

Rey: I’m just gonna watch all of this from the Falcon

Jannah: I don’t even want to know

Nimi: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: I mean it’s a little obvious

Rey: I love how everyone else is just watching and giving them space like ‘I should probably stop them, but this is also really entertaining’.

Mitaka: I seriously would join the Resistance just to see Kaydel and Zorii’s craziness.

Maddy: IKR

Rey: OMIGOD KAYDEL

Gwen: What did she do now?

Nimi: She accidentally spray-painted Jessika

Rey: SHE’S BRIGHT YELLOW

Arm: WHAT????

Mitaka: And this is why I’m joining the Resistance

Arashell: Where is everyone?

Jannah: Outside, by the Falcon

Jannah: It’s hilarious- everyone’s just watching and trying to keep a straight face xDDDD

Arm: I don’t even want to know what they’re doing with the spray paint

Nimi: Poe’s going to kill us....

Temiri: I thought Poe’s X-wing was black and orange, not green with purple and yellow dots?


	86. Choosing A New Book...

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Book Nerds

Rey: ARMITAGE HUX AND ROSE TICO, IF EITHER OF YOU FIGHT, I’M SENDING KAYDEL AND ZORII AFTER YOU

Arm: I’m on the other side of the galaxy

Poe: We’ve given them permission to borrow the Falcon if you fight

Arm: ...

Gwen: So anyway, we need to pick out a new book to read.

Rey: I vote for Pride And Prejudice  😏

Ben: I’m sure Arm and Rose would like that

Arm: EXCUSE ME WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY

Arm: ARE YOU CHALLENGING ME

Rey: I mean...kind of.

Ben: Oh, definitely.

Arm: THIS MEANS WAR

Rey: We’re already at war

Arm: WELL THIS IS PERSONAL. YOU TWO AGAINST ME. LET’S GO.

Rey: As you already said, we’re basically on opposite sides of the galaxy.

Arm: THEN WHY DON’T YOU SHIP YOURSELF TO THE FIRST ORDER AGAIN- CAN’T GO ANY WORSE THAN LAST TIME

Rey: ...

Rey: this means war

Gwen: Oh no. This will never end well.

Mitaka: Uh oh...

Rey: Poe, you wanna come?

Poe: Sure

Gwen: Um maybe we should make up some rules like ‘no killing’ and stuff.

Poe: Yes. Do that. Or we will have to call Kaydel and Zorii so they can hide Hux’s body.

Rey: I-

Rey: I’m not even going to ask you why you think Kaydel and Zorii will have a place to hide a body.

Arm: Why would they have to hide my body? I could take these two EASILY.

Mitaka: ...what even happened to this conversation?

Poe: Murder happened

Gwen: Well...WILL happen

Ben: I don’t think this is a good idea but I need an excuse to murder Hux so ok


	87. How does one even name this chapter?

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Book Nerds

Rey added Kaydel

Mitaka: Why Kaydel?

Rey: Idk she wanted to come.

Gwen: Okay, so I thought of some rules u guys have to follow.

Gwen: No actually injuring opponents, use the weapon of your choice (DON’T MAKE ME REGRET THIS ONE YOU GUYS), fight until one side surrenders, and the most important rule of all: STAY QUIET AND DO NOT BE DISCOVERED BY ANY FO MEMBERS (I mean other than Maddy, if we randomly run into her then it’s fine).

Ben: Yea that’s not gonna work at all

Mitaka: Ok is anyone actually cheering for Arm or have we all agreed this is hopeless?

Rey: Uh guys is it safe to land?

Gwen: I might cheer for Arm just because I feel bad for him xD

Arm: I WILL DESTROY THESE TWO EASILY

Ben: Funny because the last person to say that is now dead

Rey: For real this time...

Rey: Anyway, is it safe to land?

Poe: We’ve been waiting here for ten minutes.

Kaydel: I don’t even know what’s going on here.

Mitaka: So Arm thinks he can beat Rey and Ben.

Kaydel: This won’t end well

Poe: IS. IT. SAFE. TO. LAND.

Ben: Yes. I’m waiting for you guys, and then Mitaka’s making sure no one comes down the hallway.

Rey:  👍

Poe: EWWWWW

Gwen: ???

Poe: NO PDA

Kaydel: Awww #Reylo

Gwen: ???

Kaydel: You don’t wanna know

Gwen: Whenever she says that, she’s typically right...

Mitaka: Come on, this way!

Poe: Mitaka! I didn’t even see you there...

Mitaka: I mean I technically was hiding.

Kaydel: So what weapons are everyone using? This seems like an...interesting fight.

Kaydel: By interesting, I mean very unfair.

Arm: EXACTLY!!!! THEY HAVE NO CHANCE!!!!!!

Arm: TIME TO DIE, JEDI

Rey: Ok how long have u been practicing that line?

Arm: SHUT UP...UH...

Arm: What’s ur last name

Mitaka: Why do we always refer to someone by their last name whenever we tell them to shut up?

Arm: SHUT UP MITAKA

Arm: AND ANSWER MY QUESTION

Rey: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ANSWER UR QUESTION IF I DON’T KNOW THE ANSWER

Poe: I’m very confused right now

Arm: I AM TOO, JUST MAKE UP A LAST NAME

Ben: Solo. It’s Solo.

Arm: I DIDN’T ASK FOR YOUR LAST NAME I ASKED FOR REY’S

Ben: Yes and I told you what her last name is

Kaydel:  😱 Omigod I can’t

Gwen:  😭😭😭 the fluff is with those two

Mitaka: GUYS SHUT UP

Poe: ok seriously Mitaka-

Mitaka: NO I’M SERIOUS I HEAR SOMETHING

Mitaka: QUICK! HIDE IN THAT CONVENIENTLY PLACED SUPPLY CLOSET!

Kaydel: Ow!

Rey: Kaydel, stop sitting on me

Kaydel: I’m standing!

Ben: Yeah, on my feet

Poe: I’m...sitting

Mitaka: I think I’m stuck in a corner.

Gwen: What even happened?

Poe: I think Mitaka heard stormtroopers and now we’re all stuck in a closet

Mitaka: Ok, so I’m gonna try to find the light switch...

Kaydel: EW MITAKA

Mitaka: Sorry!

Ben: Wait, I think I found the light switch.

Poe: ...

Kaydel: ...

Rey: ...

Ben: ...

Mitaka: ...

Gwen: Guys what’s happening?

Rey: We’re all just staring at each other and wondering how we got into the positions we’re currently in.

Mitaka: Ok, I’m gonna try to move to the side, and Kaydel I need you to duck under my arm and get out of the closet.

Kaydel: Like this?

Mitaka: Yea. Now Poe, stand up, untangle yourself from the cord...

Poe: It’s stuck.

Mitaka: Oh force. Ok, Rey can you reach your lightsaber?

Rey: Maybe?

Mitaka: Great, can you cut Poe free? Or maybe just give him the lightsaber?

Poe: umm...how do you use this thing?

Poe: AHHH OMIGOD I’M GONNA DIEEEEE

Kaydel: Poe u just need to slice that cord in half.

Poe: Ok...got it!

Gwen: Why r u guys texting and not talking?

Mitaka: Cause STORMTROOPERS Gwen

Gwen: oh

Mitaka: Alright I think the rest of us can get out...

Rey: Not true.

Mitaka: Oh yea. Kaydel, help Rey get out of that bucket.

Kaydel: HOW DID YOU EVEN FIT IN THAT THING

Rey: i’m stuck

Kaydel: Ok but HOW

Rey: Idk I fell over and somehow ended up stuck in a bucket.

Mitaka: Alright, I think we can keep going now. It’s just around the corner...


	88. FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Gwen: Oh good you guys made it

Poe: WHAT IS WITH YOU PEOPLE AND PDA?!?!?!?!

Kaydel: To be fair, Gwen and Mitaka aren’t really big on PDA.

Kaydel: Honestly, you and Finn are worse than everyone in this room.

Arm: COME FIGHT ME YOU COWARDS

Rey: He’s still at it?

Gwen: Yes, I swear if he starts ranting about how he’s gonna defeat you two one more time, I will shoot him myself.

Mitaka: Oh yea, one more rule for you force-sensitives. You’re not allowed to use the force to steal Arm’s weapon.

Ben: Ok that’s fair.

Poe: This honestly looks like a Pokémon battle. Only it’s like...Magikarp versus two Mega Charizards.

Gwen: ...

Gwen: Poe is a Pokémon.

Kaydel: Poe likes anime???

Poe: ...yes

Kaydel: I’m learning some startling things about you guys. Arm plays candy crush, Poe’s a weeb....

Ben: Maddy’s a weeb too.

Gwen: WHAT???? REALLY?????

Gwen: How do you even know this?

Ben: I walked in on her watching anime the other day.

Mitaka: Welp, looks like everyone in the FO has a secret.

Kaydel: Wait...what’s Mitaka’s?

Poe: I mean technically he and Gwen are secretly dating.

Arm: ARE YOU GOING TO STAND THERE ALL DAY OR ARE WE GONNA FIGHT

Rey: ...guess we should fight now.

Rey: I kind of feel bad.

Ben: Should we go easy on Arm?

Rey: Probably. It’ll be a little more fair.

Kaydel: Not really.

Arm: STOP STANDING THERE AND FIGHT, COWARDS!!!!!

Ben: ...just remember, you started this.

Kaydel: YESSSSS GWEN BROUGHT MILLICENT!!!!

Gwen: I couldn’t leave her in her room when the only people who actually know she exists are all down here.

Gwen: Also, I think she’ll enjoy watching Hux get his butt kicked.

Kaydel: Can I hold her?  🥺

Gwen: Of course

Mitaka: Kaydel’s just cooing at Millicent.

Mitaka: Are either of you even watching?

Kaydel: What’s the point of watching when you already know who’s winning and who’s losing.

Poe: Arm, I’d quit now if I were you.

Poe: Two lightsabers pointed at your head = not so good

Arm: I WILL NEVER SURRENDER!!!!!!

  
Rey: Ow!

Rey: What the force, Hux?!?!

Ben: Are you okay?

Rey: I’m fine.

Gwen: ARMITAGE HUX IS DISQUALIFIED FOR BREAKING THE RULES AND INTENTIONALLY INJURING AN OPPONENT

Mitaka: First Girlsquad member to ever actually follow the rules  ⬆️

Gwen: I’m not even going to deny that.

Kaydel: Wait what happened I was busy with Millicent

Kaydel: Why is everyone screaming and cursing in like a dozen different languages?

Kaydel: Ooh, that’s a good one Poe. Where’d you hear that?

Poe: Kijimi

Kaydel: Ah yes, I forgot that our BELOVED leader was once a spice runner

Poe: So was your girlfriend

Kaydel DON’T YOU DARE DRAG MY GIRLFRIEND INTO THIS

Poe: And Jannah was a stormtrooper

Kaydel: NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU-

Gwen: Oh look, Kaydel finally read Harry Potter.

Kaydel: Ok but what happened can someone explain

Mitaka: Arm got salty and shot Rey.

Kaydel: Ohhhhh

Poe: OK NO MORE PDA YOU TWO

Ben: Shut up Dameron

Gwen: Imma find a bacta patch and then we can go watch Black Swan or something.

Kaydel: Why Black Swan?

Poe: Cause for some reason we have an actual list of movies we’re all planning on watching together. I think it’s in Mitaka’s room.

Mitaka: Yea. It was in Arm’s room but then Millicent tried to eat it, so we moved it to Gwen’s room but she somehow lost it and it turned up on top of the refresher, so now it’s mine.

Kaydel: Huh. Can I come watch?

Poe: Sure, you can have Arm’s seat.


	89. Factions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The gang discusses Divergent, and there are some mentions of the trilogy’s ending. No official spoilers, but if you want absolutely zero ideas of where the plot goes, I would skip the very end of this chapter.

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Book Nerds

Gwen invited Kaydel

Mitaka removed Arm

Kaydel: I’m scarred for life

Mitaka: Same

Poe: Yep

Rey: Let’s take every horror movie off of our ‘movies to watch’ list.

Poe: Oh definitely. I’m never watching anything above PG again.

Gwen: I just keep looking over my shoulder this is scary.

Ben: I definitely regret deciding to watch Black Swan

Poe: I also keep looking over my shoulder but maybe that’s just because we’re in an FO ship but THIS DOESN’T FEEL NATURAL OKAY

Mitaka: Ok let’s change the topic now I’m too freaked out.

Rey: The ending tho

Mitaka: what part of change the topic did you not understand

Rey: Ok fine which faction would y’all choose if you were in Divergent?

Mitaka: Much better

Kaydel: I haven’t read Divergent

Ben: So there’s five factions you can choose in Divergent

Gwen: Amity is the faction of kindness

Mitaka: Candor is the faction of truth

Rose: Abnegation is the faction of selflessness

Mitaka: Rose I seriously forgot you were here

Rose: Yea I refuse to chat while Arm’s here but you guys kicked him out for some reason so I’ll chat now

Ben: Your boyfriend shot my girlfriend

Kaydel: Guys before you start arguing, what are the other two factions?

Rey: Dauntless is the faction of bravery

Poe: And Erudite is the faction of knowledge

Mitaka: and evil

Gwen: Technically not all Erudite are evil.

Poe: Anyway, you choose a faction and live that way for the rest of your life, unless you get kicked out of your faction, then you would join the factionless.

Rose: I’d choose Amity. We should save what we love, not fight what we hate.

Poe: I’d choose Dauntless. Bravery all the way.

Gwen: ...Dauntless? I don’t wanna die, but at the same time, I don’t feel like I’d fit in anywhere else! I’m good at fighting, but...

Kaydel: Wait, DIE? I’m going with Erudite!

Rey: Candor. The truth is important, and no one deserves to be deceived by others.

Poe: Candors are kind of jerks though.

Gwen: dontstartfightingdontstartfightingdontstartfighting

Poe: I’m not gonna fight Rey if she just got shot it wouldn’t be a fair fight

Rey: *pulls out lightsaber* you wanna test that theory Flyboy?

Ben: Rey no

Ben: You’re going to reopen your blaster wound.

Rey: ...fine

Mitaka: Why is everyone now calling Poe ‘Flyboy’ when they’re trying to insult him? Who even started that?

Mitaka: And why has everyone been fighting lately?

Kaydel: NO ****ING FIGHTING

Rose: I’m guessing that was a meme reference?

Kaydel: Omg I have to send that to u now  


Gwen: That describes the past few weeks of our texting pretty accurately

Mitaka: I know I just said they’re evil, but I’m going to choose Erudite. Brains over brawn any day.

Ben: Dauntless. But also Candor. But also Erudite.

Rose: Divergent

Rose: What do you think everyone else is? I bet Nimi would be Erudite, she has SO MANY books in her room. It’s a kriffing library.

Kaydel: Zorii would be Dauntless.

Mitaka: I just want to say that I genuinely think Tris gets a happy ending to her story

Gwen: I-

Rey: Y E S

Rose: Where’s my pencil I gotta write this one down in the headcanon notebook

Rose: Which is now actually two notebooks.

Ben: You guys filled up an entire notebook with your theories?

Gwen: I helped.

Mitaka: Hand over the notebook Rose, I’ve already written down my theory and evidence

Poe: WHAT EVIDENCE DO YOU HAVE

Poe: HOW COULD TRIS HAVE EVEN-

Rey: POE DAMERON IF YOU SPOIL THE SERIES FOR KAYDEL I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN MYSELF

Mitaka: And anyway Poe my girlfriend escaped a trash compactor I’m not about to underrate the abilities of heroines.

Rose: Awww he called Gwen a heroine

Rey: 1. She is, and 2. They’ve been dating for months now.

Rose: I DON’T CARE OK

Kaydel: Oh no...Rose is back to being angry...


	90. Swimming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yet another crazy adventure set at 2am, because this is Girlsquad and for some reason they love to do things at 2 in the morning.

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel removed Gwen

Kaydel removed Maddy

Kaydel: Let’s go swimming!

Rose: Kaydel it’s two in the morning

Kaydel: I know! We should go swimming!

Zorii: I’m in!

Jannah: Same!

Nimi: Girls, it’s wayyyy too early, and where are we even supposed to swim?

Kaydel: I found a little pond/lake thingy

Rey: So we’re going to sneak out of the base, somehow find our way to your pond, and swim in the middle of the night?

Kaydel: Yep!

Zorii: Ooh I like this plan!

Nimi: THAT’S NOT EVEN A PLAN

Rey: We’re not going swimming.

Zorii: And why not?

Rey: Because Poe. And also- ZORII WHAT ARE YOU-

Rose: OMIGOD WHAT HAPPENED

Rey: LET ME GO YOU KRIFFING BANTHA BUTT!!!!!!!

Rose: WHAT IS SHE DOING

Jannah: She’s dragging Rey down the hallway by her ankle.

Nimi: So glad I’m hiding in the closet rn

Rey: Oh no.

Nimi: What?

Rey: Zorii just started smiling. And not a nice smile. More of a ‘I’m an axe murderer and I’m going to kill you in your sleep’ smile.

Nimi: *clutches stuffed Ewok doll* oh no

Arashell: WHO JUST SCREAMED

Rey: Now look what you’ve done, you woke up the child

Rose: Ok but I love how she wakes up at 2 in the morning because she heard someone scream and then immediately logs into her phone to text us bc she knows we have something to do with it

Arashell: I’M SERIOUS WHO JUST SCREAMED

Jannah: That was Nimi. Zorii just scared the poodoo out of her.

Arashell: WHY?

Kaydel: We’re going swimming

Rey: NO WE ARE NOT

Zorii: Ok I got Nimi

Nimi: please stop dragging me

Zorii: Jannah can you get Rey

Rey: I know how to walk

Zorii: Can’t risk you running away. Jannah?

Jannah: Got it.

Kaydel: Rose, do we need to drag you?

Rose: No, I’m coming!


	91. At The Lake

Arashell: Where are we going?

Kaydel: To this swimming hole I found.

Rey: Where did you even find two pairs of binders?

Zorii: Those are mine.

Rose: I-

Rose: Zorii-

Zorii: Yes?

Rose: WHY DO YOU HAVE BINDERS

Zorii: Rose, I used to be a criminal.

Nimi: You stole them from Poe, didn’t you?

Zorii: Of course!

Jannah: Are we almost there?

Kaydel: Yea, we’re here.

Jannah: Oh, cool!

Rey: Wow. Ok. That’s big. That’s really big.

Zorii: AND NOW WE TOSS THE HOSTAGES IN!!!!!!!

Nimi: NO!!!!!

Nimi: DON’T YOU DARE!!!!!!

Jannah: ...

Nimi: ZORII!!!!!!

Jannah: Umm...is your phone waterproof?

Nimi: I- yes, I put it in one of those waterproof cases right after Kaydel decided she wanted to swim.

Zorii: ON TO THE NEXT HOSTAGE!!!!!!!

Rey: ZORII I CAN’T SWIM

Rey: ZORII!!!!!!!

Rose: Um guys I actually think she’s drowning

Jannah: I’d go in but I can’t swim either.

Kaydel: YOU LIVED NEXT TO AN OCEAN AND YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO SWIM?!?!?!

Jannah: No?

Nimi: How’d you get the binders off?

Rey: Magic

Nimi: Ok well can u take mine off?

Rey: yea

Kaydel: Oh good you didn’t drown. Poe might’ve actually killed me then.

Rey: POE might kill you? You just shoved Nimi and I into a lake!!!!

Kaydel: Technically that was Zorii

Nimi: Zorii do you want the binders back?

Zorii: HOW DID YOU GET THOSE OFF????

Nimi: MaGiC

Zorii: IT TOOK ME HOURS TO GET THOSE OFF

Arashell: Why were you wearing them?

Zorii: ...so a long time ago Poe and i were spice runners and he handcuffed me while I was sleeping and it took me three hours to get them off. They’re specially made by the best droid mechanic on Kijimi and they’re pretty much inescapable.

Arashell: So how’d you escape?

Zorii: The secret ingredient is crime.

Rey: NO TEACHING ARASHELL THIEVERY

Nimi: OR ANYTHING ELSE CRIME-RELATED

Zorii: And then I slapped Poe in the face. If a boy does something annoying, slap him.

Rose: Or biting. That works too.

Rey: I-

Rey: i mean i don’t condone with this conversation, but stabbing works just as well

Nimi: See and this is why I’m single.


	92. Imma Feeeeeesh!!!

Arashell: Are we supposed to just jump in?

Kaydel: Yep

Arashell: But our clothes are gonna get wet.

Kaydel: Yep

Arashell: Okay!

Jannah: Wow. She just jumped right in.

Jannah: Welp, guess I better learn to swim real fast.

Zorii: And she jumped in too. Alrighty then.

Nimi: Um Zorii

Zorii: Yes?

Nimi: Are you just gonna jump in with your helmet on?

Zorii: I mean I was planning to.

Zorii: But now that everyone’s shooting me weird looks I guess not.

Kaydel: Ight I’m getting in

Kaydel: Let’s play Marco Polo!

Rey: Why are we still texting while in the water?

Kaydel: Because if we start talking out loud the night watch peeps will catch us.

Jannah: What’s Marco Polo?

Kaydel: It’s a game where one person has to close their eyes and say Marco and everyone else says Polo and the person who said Marco has to follow their voices and try to tag someone.

Nimi: Wouldn’t that fall under the category of loud?

Kaydel: THEN WHISPER NIMI

Arashell: Who’s Marco first?

Zorii: Let’s do not it! (Nose goes)

Rey: Aww come on can someone else go first?

Jannah: You’re it!

Rose: Jannah you look like a drowned rat.

Jannah: I can’t see a thing right now, my hair’s getting in my eyes.

Rey: Ok. Mar-

Rose: Well that failed.

Nimi: WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE DROWNS

Jannah: I can’t swim

Arashell: I can’t swim

Rey: Ok someone else should be Marco.

Rose: No, you should keep doing it- that was entertaining!

Rey: WHY did there have to be a drop?!?!

Nimi: WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE WILL DROWN

Kaydel: Because everyone else is just enjoying watching you pull Rey out of the water every five seconds.

Zorii: It looks like you’re giving her a piggyback ride.

Jannah: Oml you’re right.

Nimi: Rey don’t drown.

Rey: I’ll try

Zorii: DO OR DO NOT, THERE IS NO TRY

Arashell: Zorii stop saying that

Kaydel: AHHH

Kaydel: THIS MEANS WAR

Rose: What happened I was underwater?

Kaydel: NIMI JUST PULLED MY FEET OUT FROM UNDER ME

Rose: Ok but at this point you deserve it for waking us all up.

Rose: While we’re here, I challenge all of you to a swimming race.

Rose: Well everyone except for Jannah and Rey and Arashell.

Nimi: Sure why not

Zorii: LES DO TRAINS

Kaydel: Yea I’m in.

Jannah: 3, 2, 1...

Arashell: GO!

Jannah: And...

Jannah: Rose won!

Zorii: Girl, are you secretly a fish?

Rose: No I just swam a lot with Paige.

Kaydel: So you’re a fish, but not secretly.

Jannah: IMMA FEEEEEESH!!!!!

Nimi: She’s gonna drown

Kaydel: Yep

Nimi: Am I gonna have to rescue her?

Kaydel: Yep

Zorii: IMMA FEEEESH TOO!!!!!

Kaydel: WE’RE ALL FEEEEEESH!!!!!!

Rey: Fish would like permission to come ashore.

Kaydel: Oh stop complaining and get over here! Arashell, you too!

Nimi: Wait I can only save one drowning person at a time-


	93. Pirates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arm is back! :D  
> And apparently there will be a Christmas special on Disney+ this year...set after the events of TROS.

Ben has started a chat room

Ben invited Book Nerds

Poe: WAIT

Poe: BEFORE YOU SAY WHATEVER CRAZY THING YOU’RE ABOUT TO SAY THAT WILL START SOME CHAOTIC EVENT, I HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING

Poe: ROSE TICO AND REY SOLO WHY WERE YOU AND EVERY RESISTANCE GIRLSQUAD MEMBER SOAKED THIS MORNING?!?!??!!?

Rose: About that...

Rey: To be fair, it was Kaydel’s idea. We were dragged along!

Rose: Literally

Poe: EXPLAIN

Rose: We went swimming at two in the morning because Kaydel and Jannah and Zorii dragged us to this swimming place they found and they handcuffed Nimi and Rey and we tried to play Marco Polo and had a swimming race.

Gwen: Why do they have handcuffs?

Mitaka: What do you mean when you say you were literally dragged along?

Arm: What is it with you guys and doing stuff at 2 in the morning?!

Rey: You don’t want to know the answers to any of those questions.

Poe: I’m not even surprised anymore. Is that why someone was screaming?

Rose: ...that was Nimi.

Gwen: She was trying to escape Zorii and Kaydel and Jannah?

Rose: Exactly.

Mitaka: Anyway, why were we all called here today?

Ben: Who wants to watch the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy? We haven’t had a movie night in a long time.

Mitaka: But didn’t we just watch Black Sw-

Gwen: WE DO NOT MENTION THAT TIME

Rey: *looks over shoulder*

Rose: *shudders*

Poe: *hides under blanket*

Ben: *checks under bed*

Mitaka: Ok fine.

Rose: Why Pirates of the Caribbean?

Ben: Because Gwen was humming the theme song in the shower this morning and now I want to watch the whole series again.

Poe: ...why...why do you know what Gwen’s singing in the shower?

Ben: Because our rooms are right next to each other and the walls are thin. Or Gwen’s just really loud.

Ben: She was doing Let It Go the other day.

Arm: Oh yeah, I heard that!

Gwen: I...am going to kill you both.

Rey: Poe is a Pokémon and Gwen is a Disney princess.

Mitaka: Are we gonna watch the whole series at once or just the first one?

Ben: Idc whichever.

Ben: How much free time do you guys have?

Mitaka: Too much.

Arm: If I can bring Millicent, then I have about 18 hours. If not, I have five minutes.

Rose: I dunno, Poe?

Poe: Funny because our schedules are completely empty for exactly the amount of time it will take to watch all three movies.

Rey: I didn’t really have anything to begin with.

Rey: I think the war has come to a complete stop ever since we started this book club and Girlsquad.

Arm: Pretty much.

Rose: I mean you’re not wrong.

Poe: Rey get the Falcon ready.

Rey: Poe I literally live in it.

Gwen: Really?

Rey: I mean pretty much. I have a bunk inside the base and stuff.

Gwen: Huh. I just pictured all of you typing from your rooms.

Mitaka: Enough chitchat. Do you have all the movies?

Ben: Just the first two.

Gwen: I have the third one.

Ben: Great. Arm, get the cat, Gwen, get the movie, Poe and Rey and Rose, get over here.

Mitaka: What about me?

Gwen: ...get the Pirate’s Booty.

Rey: THE WHAT NOW????

Poe: Rey, it’s popcorn.


	94. Nutella

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited Girlsquad

Rose: Well at least it’s not 2am.

Jannah: I require...

Kaydel: A SHRUBBERY

Jannah: No.

Jannah: I require a detective

Gwen: Say what?

Maddy: Like that Shirtlocks Home guy?

Nimi: its sherlock holmes

Maddy: Yea whatever, him

Jannah: Yes.

  
Jannah: Because we have a problem.

Zorii: The First Order’s building another Starkiller?

Arashell: Someone died?

Rey: Gwen’s playing with knives again?

Jannah: ASDFGHJKL NO

Jannah: IT’S NOT THAT SERIOUS

Rose: Kaydel painted Zorii’s nails again?

Jannah: More serious than that.

Gwen: Just tell us!

Jannah: SOMEONE STOLE MY NUTELLA

Rey: *facepalms*

Rose: THIS MEANS WAR

Rose: I mean as long as we get some once we find it.

Jannah: Yea of course. You seriously thought I wasn’t going to share?

Gwen: What is Nutella?

Jannah: OMIGOD YOU’VE NEVER HAD IT!?!?!?

Rose: See and this is why you need to join the Resistance.

Rey: n-

Rey: nutella?

Jannah: It is chocolaty goodness.

Rey: yummm

Jannah: And I need to find out who stole it.

Zorii: *grabs blaster* I think I know where to look.

Kaydel: ???

Arashell: I’ll ask Tem and Oni

Maddy: Maybe it teleported to the FO somehow.

Rey: I’d argue but I’ve seen a lightsaber teleport so it’s actually possible.

Maddy: Wait, WHAT?!?!? I was joking!

Gwen: I mean I climbed out of a trash compactor, so I’m not really going to argue about what’s possible and what’s not.

Kaydel: Can we stop arguing about what’s possible and what’s not and just find the Nutella? I need sugar.

Nimi: No you don’t

Arashell: Temiri and Oniho don’t have it.

Zorii: I think I know who took it.

Jannah: WHO

Zorii: Poe Dameron.

Rose: I wish I could say I’m surprised but he WAS a spice runner so...

Kaydel: Strike team, assemble!

Rey: Wait what?

Kaydel: Everyone grab a weapon and meet outside my room in three minutes.

Rey: I’ll video call Gwen and Maddy.

Gwen: YESSS!

Maddy: *grabs popcorn* This should be good!

Nimi: I don’t have a weapon, I’m a pilot.

Zorii: Use the porg, Nimi.

Nimi: *grabs Jessika*

  
Rose: *grabs electro prod*

Rey: *reluctantly grabs lightsaber*

Zorii: *grabs various weapons from Kijimi*

Gwen: Uh oh.

Rose: Wait we’re still going.

Jannah: *grabs bow*

Arashell: *grabs training blaster*

Kaydel: *grabs hairbrush* Let’s do this.

Maddy: Why a hairbrush?

Kaydel: Poe doesn’t trust me enough to give me a weapon.

Maddy: I...I can see why.


	95. Investigation

Arashell: So we’re just going to run into Poe’s room and ask for the Nutella?

Kaydel: No, we’re going to conduct a fancy police thing called an investigation.

Rose: That’s not a fancy police thing.

Kaydel: I DON’T CARE

Rey: Why did we need the weapons then?

Kaydel: So we’re more intimidating.

Rose: You’re a 5 ft 1 blonde with a hairbrush.

Gwen: ...please don’t fight

Zorii:  😂 okay but she’s not wrong

Jannah: Can we do good cop/bad cop?

Nimi: What does that even mean?

Rey: WE ARE NOT INTERROGATING ANYBODY

Kaydel: We aren’t?

Zorii: Wait, what?!?! Why not?!

Nimi: Oh force

Nimi: This is getting out of hand! Now there are two of them!

Arashell: We’re not gonna kill anyone, right?

Jannah: Believe me, Arashell. Nutella is worth it.

Arashell:  😳

Kaydel: So who’s bad cop?

Rose: Who are we even interrogating?

Rey: NO ONE. WE ARE NOT INTERROGATING ANYONE. AND NO MURDER EITHER.

Gwen: Maddy pass the popcorn.

Maddy: NO it’s mine!

Gwen: Please?

Maddy: ...fine. Just a little.

Zorii: Here’s the plan.

Zorii: We find Poe. We question Poe. We get Jannah’s Nutella. We eat the Nutella.

Zorii: Is anyone here allergic to nuts?

Nimi: Evidently not if I can hang out with you.

Gwen: OHHHHHH

Rose: I think we’re all good.

Arashell: Wait where even is Poe?

Jannah: Probably his room. Or Command. Or the mess hall. Those are really the only places Poe ever goes, aside from our rooms so he can yell at us.

Kaydel: TO POE’S ROOM!

Maddy: Is she Naruto running?

Rey: *facepalms* yes

Gwen: So Maddy IS a weeb!

Maddy: Yep!  😁

Rey: We should follow her before she runs into something. Or someone.

Gwen: I want to join the Resistance just so I can see Kaydel Naruto running down the hall with a hairbrush and the rest of Girlsquad following her and it’s just a totally normal occurrence.

Rose: Yea, at this point nobody is even surprised any more.

Rey: Actually there’s a lot of people watching.

Maddy: xD Gwen we need to try this.

Gwen: With who? I can’t see anyone agreeing to it?

Maddy: True...hey guys are you free tomorrow?

Arashell: Ya

Nimi: We shouldn’t have too much to do tomorrow. Why?

Maddy: Can you guys come here and run through the halls with me and Gwen?

Gwen: I’m not doing it.

Maddy: Can you guys come here and run through the halls with me?

Kaydel: YESSSSSSSS WE SHALL RUN THROUGH THE HALLSSSSSSSS

Rey: no thank you

Rose: YES I will come!

Gwen: Why do I feel like you’re only going to do this because it’s gonna annoy Arm?

Rose: Because that’s the only reason I’m going to do it.

Gwen: *facepalms*

Kaydel: SHHH! We’re outside Poe’s room now!

Zorii: Can I kick in the door?

Nimi: No!

Zorii: Okay, Arashell and Jannah, watch closely. This could come in handy one day.

Rey: ZORII NO TEACHING ANYONE HOW DO KICK DOWN A DOOR

Zorii: Too late!

Arashell: Woah.

Arashell: Cool!

Nimi: Zorii...

Kaydel: HANDS WHERE WE CAN SEE ‘EM, DAMERON!

Gwen: Did she just type that and scream it at the same time?

Rey: Yep.

Rose: We’re so going to end up in the brig for this.

Zorii: Wouldn’t be my first time!

Arashell: Is that music?

Nimi: Who put on Mission Impossible soundtrack?

Jannah: Not me! *hides phone*

Nimi: I...*sighs* never mind.

Rey invited Poe

Poe: Would someone like to explain why Kaydel is pointing a hairbrush at me?

Gwen: ...not it.

Kaydel: Listen up, Dameron. We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way.

Poe: Did you just call me Dameron???

Kaydel: Now we’ve got a few questions for you, and the quicker you answer them, the quicker we’ll send you on your merry way.

Maddy: Does anyone else lowkey think Kaydel is secretly a policewoman?

Zorii: Five minutes ago, no. Now...definitely.

Kaydel: So. Are you going to cooperate and answer our questions, or are we going to have to do this the hard way?

Poe: Answer your questions?

Kaydel: NO ANSWERING MY QUESTIONS WITH MORE QUESTIONS

Poe: Answer your questions.


	96. Interrogation

Zorii: So if Kaydel’s bad cop, who’s good cop?

Rey: No. Interrogation.

Nimi: Exactly.

Poe: You do realize I am your general and I can throw you all in the brig?

Kaydel: You do realize that you are a thief and have stolen moi child’s precious snack?

Jannah: Gwen if he does throw us in the brig can you help us sneak out?

Gwen: Of course.

Kaydel: Guys we need a good cop. I nominate Nimi.

Nimi: I nominate Jannah!

Jannah: No, I’m the victim. I can’t be the cop too. I nominate Zorii.

Zorii: I’m a criminal. I EVADE the police, not join them. I nominate Rose!

Rose: Excuse me I got arrested last year. I’m not a policewoman. I nominate Arashell!

Arashell: What?

Arashell: I nomniate Gwen.

Gwen: It’s spelled nominate.

Arashell: Ok. I nominate Gwen.

Gwen: Yea but I gotta help you sneak out of jail. I can’t do that if I’m in jail. I nominate Maddy!

Maddy: If you nominate me I won’t give you any more popcorn.

Gwen: Did I say Maddy? I meant Rey!

Rey: Uh. I. um. No thank you?

Kaydel: You’re good cop now!

Rey: no

Kaydel: yes

Rey: You do it!

Kaydel: uno reverse

Kaydel: Plus, I’m bad cop.

Poe: Can I go sleep now?

Kaydel: NO! YOU HAVE TO ANSWER OUR QUESTIONS!

Nimi: Did- did she just brandish a hairbrush? At Poe?

Rose: xD Yep.

Kaydel: First question. What is Nutella?

Poe: What kind of a question is that???

Kaydel: ANSWER

Rose: I take back what I said earlier about her not being intimidating.

Poe: It’s chocolate hazelnut spread.

  
Kaydel: Correct. And because you answered correctly, I’ll let Rey do the talking cause she’s the nice cop.

Rey: What?

Zorii: Ooh, what does that paper say?

Rey: When did you even find time to write down all these random questions!?!?

Kaydel: Just ask the questions.

Rey: Uh...when was the last time you had Nutella?

Poe: What?

Kaydel: ANSWER IT, DAMERON

Poe: Ok I’ll answer but are the binders really necessary?

Zorii: Yep! Payback!

Gwen: Zorii have you seriously waited this long just to get revenge for Poe handcuffing you when you were teens?

Zorii: Yea, why?

Gwen: I like her.

Kaydel: NO STEALING MY GIRLFRIEND, PHASMA

Rose: Why is she suddenly referring to everyone by their last name?

Kaydel: BECAUSE I WANT TO, TICO

Rey: Ok this is getting out of hand.

Kaydel: JUST ASK THE QUESTIONS, SOLO

Arashell: What?

Jannah: Oml why where we not invited to the wedding.

Rey: What wedding?

Gwen: Hehe long story involving Pride and Prejudice, the words ‘shut up’, etc.

Nimi: Did you just say ‘etc.’?

Gwen: Yea.

Kaydel: CHIREEN, PHASMA,STOP GETTING DISTRACTED

Poe: Umm...I ate Nutella this morning?

Poe: Oh no

Poe: Why are Kaydel and Zorii doing that axe-murderer smile thing again?

Kaydel: Ladies and...more ladies, we have found our culprit.

Zorii: One last question, Poe. Where did you hide Jannah’s Nutella?

Maddy: Oh no I heard a lightsaber activate what’s going on

Poe: Please stop pointing your weapons at me.

Kaydel: ADMIT IT, DAMERON. YOU STOLE THE NUTELLA.

Poe: Yes. I was hungry. I love Nutella. Why does this require all of Girlsquad to interrogate me?

Jannah: ASDFGHJKL WHERE IS IT

Poe: It’s in my x-wing.

Kaydel: BLISS! CHIREEN! GO RETRIEVE THE NUTELLA!

Nimi: W-why me?

Kaydel: Cause you’re a pilot and Zorii’s a criminal. You two are going to be the best at breaking into Poe’s x-wing.

Nimi: oh ok.

Rose: What should we do?

Kaydel: TICO! SAR! SOLO! YOU THREE GUARD THE PRISONER!

Rey: Prisoner?

Arashell: Are we gonna get thrown in the brig for this?

Poe: Absolutely.

Rose: QUIET PRISONER.

Jannah: Why is everyone stuck in caps lock all of the sudden?

Rose: Idk, sorry.

Nimi: We found it!!!

Poe: Kriff.

Zorii: WE HAVE RETRIEVED THE CHOCOLATEY GOODNESS!!!!

Jannah: YAY!!!!!!!

Rey: You called us together

  
Rey: Had us hold the kriffing general hostage

Rey: And will probably get us thrown in the brig

Rey: FOR A JAR OF WHATEVER THAT IS!?!?!

Jannah: It’s Nutella. Try some.

Rey: Oh you’re right that was worth it.


	97. The Brig

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW, 99 chapters!!! Almost triple digits 😁🎉

Rey has started a chatroom

Rey invited Girlsquad

Rey: That wasn’t worth it.

Rose: Well we might be in jail, but at least we’re all in jail together!

Zorii: I say we sacrifice Rose.

Rey: Hey Gwen, remember earlier when you said you’d help us escape if Poe threw us in the brig?

Gwen: Yes?

Gwen: Oh force.

Gwen: No. You’re kidding.

Rey: Help us, Gwen Phasma. You’re my only hope.

Rey: And Maddy. Maddy also.

Nimi: I have to say, I expected the brig to be a lot...different. Darker I guess.

Kaydel: So you’d be happy if it was dark and creepy?

Nimi: I...yes? No?

Arashell: How long are we supposed to stay here anyway?

Rose: Until Gwen and Maddy break us out.

Gwen: Guys send a pic please, Arm doesn’t believe me.

Rose: NO DON’T SEND ARM A PICTURE

Gwen: I have to or he won’t let me take a TIE to come rescue you.

Rose: ...ugh, fine.

Zorii: Everybody say ‘prison’!

Kaydel: IMMA GIRAFFE

Nimi: Owwww...

Maddy: What happened?

Nimi: Kaydel jumped on me.

Kaydel: I just wanted a piggyback ride  😭

Gwen: HE THREW THE PORG IN JAIL!?!?!?!

Zorii: Yes lol

Gwen: Maddy get over here, you gotta see this.

Maddy: Why is everyone actually smiling for the camera?

Rose: Cause this is Girlsquad and we have fun even when we’re in jail.

Zorii: For some reason, Rose seems to actually be enjoying this. It’s slightly frightening.

Rose: Well at least he let us keep our phones.

Rey: Ok but who invented force-blocking handcuffs!?!?!?!?

Zorii: The same droidsmith who made the inescapable handcuffs.

Nimi: What inescapable handcuffs?

Zorii: The ones that you and Rey escaped.

Nimi: heheheheheh

Gwen: Force? Blocking? Handcuffs?

Gwen: May I borrow them?

Rey: Oh force-

Zorii: xDD YES

Nimi: I wonder if the leaders of the Empire and Rebel Alliance ever had to deal with this  😂

Nimi: Anyway, Gwen and Maddy, ETA?

Maddy: Just a few more minutes.

Arashell: Isn’t Poe just going to throw us back in the brig?

Rey: No because the second we get out we’re getting our weapons.

Jannah: And my Nutella.

Rey: Sure. That too.

Kaydel: But Poe took my hairbrush.

Gwen: Use a frying pan instead.

Kaydel: asdfghjkl what?

Gwen: It worked in Tangled!

Kaydel: I’m not going to question that right now.

Maddy: Where do we land?

Rose: By the Falcon

Gwen: Where even is the brig?

Jannah: If you go into the main building of our base, there will be signs showing you where the brig is.

Nimi: Wait, what if they get caught? I mean everyone knows who Captain Phasma is-

Gwen: Yea but they don’t know Gwen.

Nimi: Oh you’re right. I don’t know why I thought you and Maddy would just come sneaking in here with your stormtrooper armor on.

Arashell: How are we gonna get out?

Kaydel: We walk. On our legs.

Arashell: But won’t Poe see us?

Arashell: What about the binders?

Rey: I can get them off. I believe Zorii can as well?

Zorii: Yea but I’d need a bobby pin or something like that-

Zorii: Oh.

Rey: Sorry, did I hit you in the face?

Zorii: No I caught it.

Gwen: We’re almost there.

Kaydel: DON’T BE SUSPICIOUS, DON’T BE SUSPICIOUS

Rey: Kaydel stop singing I need to focus so I can get your binders off.

Kaydel: awww you’re no fun

Gwen: We’re here!

Gwen: Oh wait. We need the keys to open the door.


	98. TO THE VENTS!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so it looks like AO3 was glitching or something because I thought this had 99 chapters but this is the 98th?

Maddy: Ok well...Zorii, I need a crash course!

Zorii: What?

Maddy: Can you teach me how to kick down a door?

Zorii: You just kick it really hard and try not to break your foot.

Maddy: That was simpler than I thought it would be. Anyway-

Nimi: Did she actually just kick the door down?

Zorii: Yea.

Nimi: You could have done that the whole entire time.

Zorii: Yea.

Nimi: W-why?

Zorii: I wanted Gwen and Maddy to have an excuse to come here so we can have a sleepover.

Nimi: Welp, I can’t argue with that logic.

Rose: Darn I was having fun.

Gwen: In jail?

Rose: Yea, so?

Kaydel: GIRLSQUAD! ASSEMBLE!

Jannah: wut

Rey: Oh no, there she goes again.

Maddy: Kaydel Naruto running and the rest of Girlsquad following her is a lot more fun in person!

Arashell: Where are we going?

Kaydel: TO RETRIEVE OUR WEAPONSSSSSS

Rey: Aw force. This isn’t going to end well.

Kaydel: Relax, I’m not gonna murder anyone, I just want my hairbrush back.

Rey: Oh ok. I can respect that.

Rose: Where would Poe even keep our weapons....

Zorii: I think I know.

Rose: Where?

Zorii: Girls...

Zorii: It’s time to break into Poe’s room.

Jannah: Again.

Jannah: TO THE VENTS!!!

Maddy: Why?

Jannah: Because.

Gwen: YAS

Gwen: TO THE VENTS!!!!

Rey: Did anyone else not even notice the fact that there was a vent right there the entire time?

Rose: Yep.

Kaydel: Why are Gwen and Jannah actually climbing through the vents right now

Zorii: I mean it does make sense...the vents would lead all over the base, including Poe’s room...

Maddy: Aaaaannndddd....she just followed them.

Rey: *sighs* when did my life turn into this

Maddy: And now she did as well. Wow.

Gwen: Who’s not in the vents right now?

Arashell: Me, Maddy, Rose, Kaydel, Jessika, Nimi-

Arashell: Actually Rose and Kaydel are now in the vents.

Arashell: I am too.

Maddy: You know what I think we’re all going to get stuck but whatever.

Nimi: AM I SERIOUSLY THE ONLY RATIONAL PERSON IN THIS GROUP!?!?!

Nimi: ...but i should probably follow you guys so you don’t get into trouble


	99. Venting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DOUBLE CHAPTER UPDATE BECAUSE MANDALORIAN IS BACK!!!  
> Also because I was bored. And wanted to get to 100 chapters 😂 Enjoy the chaos.

Jannah: Gwen stop running into my butt!

Gwen: Stop stopping randomly!

Kaydel: NO ******* FIGHTING

Zorii: Please stop reusing the exact same meme

Rey: Zorii why can’t you just text at crawl at the same time?

Zorii: Because I’m too lazy

Nimi: Why do I have to be at the back...

Maddy: Because you didn’t want to get into trouble by sneaking through the vents.

Maddy: Which is super boring.

Rose: I don’t even know who’s in front of me but they’re being very slow.

Arashell: Jannah’s first, then Gwen, Zorii, Rey, Kaydel, Rose, me, and Maddy.

Kaydel: And then Jessika is constantly changing her position. Currently she’s on my head, trying to make a nest in my hair.

Gwen: Yea well a few minutes ago she was on my butt so stop complaining.

Jannah: Guys I found it!

Jannah: EWWW EWWW EWW

Jannah: WHY ME!??!?!?!

Rey: Oh force. What now?

Jannah: More PDA.

Rey: Ugh. Hypocrite.

Jannah: I am not!

Rey: I’m talking about Poe.

Kaydel: To be fair, it’s not in public.

Rey: Shut up Connix.

Jannah: Guys what do we do?

Zorii: We wait.

Maddy: Did she seriously just pull out a bag of supplies?

Zorii: I have fruit snacks and chicky nuggies for anyone who requires sustenance.

Maddy: What the force!?!?!

Kaydel: Don’t question it.

Arashell: Can I have some chicky nuggies?

Zorii: Sure.

Jannah: Pass the fruit snacks, please!

Jannah: Also, does anyone want to switch spots, this is disgusting.

Rey: *sighs* I’ll switch if Zorii gives me some chicky nuggies.

Zorii: I have Dino nuggies and fish nuggies

Rey: fish nuggies please

Nimi: Can I have some fish nuggies?

Zorii: Yea

Rey: Actually... does anyone want to have my chicky nuggies? I’ve suddenly lost my appetite...

Arashell: Ya

Jannah: I told you!

Rose: Ladies, find someone who looks at you like Jannah looks at chicky nuggies.

Nimi: I doubt someone like that exists.

Gwen: ...

Gwen: ...

Kaydel: What are you doing?

Gwen: Every fifteen minutes imma text ‘...’

Gwen: We’ve been here for 30 minutes.

Rey: Oh guys look they just left!

Zorii: Good. I was almost out of fruit snacks.

Maddy: Why has no one questioned the fact that Zorii has fruit snacks and chicken nuggets with her?

Nimi: Because we’re hungry. And they’re chicky nuggies, not chicken nuggets.

Kaydel: YASSSSSSS I HAVE MY HAIRBRUSH AGAIN!!!!!!!

Rey: Guys I can’t find my lightsaber.

Nimi: Jessika has it.

Rey: Oh force-

Zorii: Kriff! Poe stole back the binders I stole from him!

Gwen: I-

Gwen: I’m not going to question that, though I would like to.


	100. Help me, Nimi Chireen. You’re my only hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, NOW this as at 100 chapters! A huge social distancing thank you to everyone who’s reading this for your kudos and comments, and really just for even giving this story a try. I hope y’all are enjoying the antics and insanity, may the force be with you all 🖤

Maddy has started a chat room

Maddy invited Nimi

Maddy: Hi

Nimi: Hi?

Maddy: Can you help me with something?

Nimi: ...depends.

Nimi: What is it?

Maddy: So everyone’s getting together to watch a movie tonight?

Nimi: Ooh, what movie?

Maddy: Booksmart

Nimi: ...I don’t think Ive ever heard of it.

Nimi: One sec...

Nimi: Ohhhhh 

Maddy: So I didn’t really want to watch the movie.

Maddy: And now I have to babysit?

Nimi: Aren’t Arashell, Temiri, and Oniho old enough to take care of themselves?

Maddy: I’m not babysitting them.

Nimi: Then who-?

Maddy: The droids.

Nimi: BeeBee? (BB-8?)

Maddy: Yea. AND BB-9E!!!!!

Nimi: Oh this will be a disaster.

Maddy: Help me Nimi Chireen, you’re my only hope.

Maddy: Well, you and Jannah. I don’t think she’s gonna watch it either.

Nimi: I’ll help. It can’t be that bad, can it?

Maddy: ...picture Rose and Arm lately, but as droids.

Nimi: ...oh this is a terrible idea

Maddy: Exactly.

Maddy: Also, we have to keep quiet, we can’t be discovered or anything, cause, ya know we’re kind of supposed to be enemies.

Nimi: Oh yea sometimes I honestly forget.

Maddy: Worse case scenario, we call Jannah in and have her help us.

Nimi: I’m in.

Maddy: YES NIMI YOU ARE A LIFESAVER


	101. Adventures in Babysitting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Babysitting. Droidsitting. Whatever we’re calling this now.

Maddy has started a chat room

Maddy invited Nimi

Nimi invited BeeBee

Maddy invited Niney

Nimi: So.

Maddy: So.

Niney: <I don’t understand. Who is ‘Nimi’ and ‘BeeBee’?>

BeeBee: <Who’s Maddy? And Niney?>

Maddy: So, as you all know, your respective owners(?) are watching a movie tonight.

Niney: <This is true.>

BeeBee: <So?>

Nimi: Excuse me I don’t have an owner

Maddy: Oml not u Nimi  😂

Maddy: I meant the droids

Nimi: lol I know

Niney: <So ‘BeeBee’ is a droid as well?>

Maddy: Yes Niney, BeeBee’s a droid.

Maddy: Anyway, so yea, your partners are watching a movie, so they’re busy tonight. And now we’re all here. In Gwen’s room.

Maddy: With the cat (FORCE SHE’S SO CUTEEEE)

Nimi: The perks of being asked to babysit.

BeeBee: <Whose room? I’m with Nimi Chireen on a ship.>

Nimi: Yea, when we get there we’ll go to Gwen’s room.

BeeBee: <Nimi Chireen, our ship is flying dangerously close to a part of space that is rumored to be occupied by the First Order->

Nimi: Exactly, BeeBee.

Maddy: Don’t forget, land in bay number-

Nimi: 1977, I know.

Maddy: Okay Niney, I’m just gonna go pick up Nimi and BeeBee real quick. Don’t leave the room, and make sure the cat doesn’t poop everywhere or something.

Niney: <Yes ma’am.>

BeeBee: <Wait a minute, Maddy and Niney are FIRST ORDER MEMBERS!?!?!?>

Nimi: Shhh! We don’t wanna get caught!

BeeBee: <Poe would be extremely displeased by your actions, Nimi Chireen! And I will make sure to tell him the second we get back to->

Nimi: BeeBee, Poe ASKED us to babysit you and Niney.

Niney: <BeeBee and Nimi are rebels!?! This is treason! I am going to inform the Supreme Leader immediately->

Maddy: Yea except he’s watching Booksmart with the others.

Niney: <I do not understand. Who are these ‘others’?>

Maddy: Well right now...Rose Tico, Armitage Hux, Gwen Phasma, Kaydel Ko Connix, Ben Solo, Zorii Bliss, Rey Solo, Dopheld Mitaka, Poe Dameron, Finn Storm...uh...am I missing anyone?

Nimi: I don’t think so.

BeeBee: <Half those people aren’t even registered in my data!>

Nimi: Yeah, well, half of them are First Order.

BeeBee: <I have no records of a Finn Storm, Rey Solo, Gwen Phasma, or Ben Solo>

Niney: <I only have records of Armitage Hux, Dopheld Mitaka, and Poe Dameron>

Maddy: About that...I mean Gwen’s just a nickname. You probably know her as Captain Phasma. Ben Solo is Kylo Ren. Rey Solo is Rey. Finn Storm is Finn.

Nimi: How about we get back to Gwen’s room first?

Niney: <You mean Captain Phasma’s?>

Maddy: Yes Niney, Captain Phasma’s room.

BeeBee: <CAPTAIN PHASMA!?!??!>


	102. Adventures In Babysitting pt2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for anyone who has to deal with the madness of the election...and whatever comes afterward...hopefully this makes y’all smile 🖤  
> Also, small side note that I forgot to include last chapter, any text in <> is translated from Droid (or whatever the droid language is called) to Basic.

Nimi: Omigod I kriffing LOVE Millicent.

Maddy: Perks of babysitting, right?

Nimi: I want a cat now.

Nimi: You think Poe would be ok with me getting a cat?

BeeBee: 

Niney: 

BeeBee: 

Niney: 

Maddy: Wow

Maddy: Should we tell him that Arm’s the spy?

Nimi: No, I’m enjoying this too much.

Nimi: Maybe we should tell Niney that Arm failed miserably when he tried to get in a fight tho

Maddy: Ahh yes. I saw the recordings.

Nimi: WAIT WHAT THERE’S RECORDINGS?!?!?!? WHAT IF SOMEONE SEES THEM!?!?!

Maddy: Chill they’re in Mitaka’s room.

Nimi: Why does everyone hide their stuff in Mitaka’s room?

Maddy: I dunno, he’s the only organized person here.

Nimi: Can I watch the reocrding?

Maddy: GUYS WE’RE HAVING A MOVIE NIGHT NOW TOO

Niney: __

_Niney:_

_Maddy: I can’t-_

_Nimi: Niney, all the people who are watching Booksmart are having a movie night._

_Niney: ___

__Nimi: Um your bosses are dating Resistance scum_ _

__Maddy: You probably should’ve waited until you said that. Now they’re both gonna blow up again._ _

__Nimi: Oh yea, BeeBee your bosses are dating FO members did I forget to mention that?_ _

__Maddy: Nimi are you trying to get them to blow up or something?_ _

__BeeBee:_ _

__Maddy: Oop Poe’s been cursing-_ _

__Nimi: No I’m serious. Want names?_ _

__Maddy: Nimi-_ _

__Maddy: Aren’t you usually the responsible one!?!?!_ _

__Nimi: Yea well I’m taking a break from being responsible right now._ _

__Niney:_ _

__Maddy: Oh force Mitaka’s gonna kill me-_ _

__Maddy: You’re gonna blow up the droids!_ _

__Nimi: Always tell the truth 🙂_ _

__Niney: ____

___Nimi: Let’s see..._ _ _

___Maddy: Omigod don’t tell them!!!!!_ _ _

___Nimi: I might..._ _ _

___Maddy: I’m so dead_ _ _

___Maddy: Nimi, do you WANT Mitaka to kill me?_ _ _

___Nimi: *sighs* Fine, I won’t tell them._ _ _

___Nimi: Anyway, y’all wanna watch a fun movie?_ _ _

___BeeBee:_ _ _

___Nimi: Idk what does Poe watch?_ _ _

___BeeBee: <************************>_ _ _

___Maddy: Wow_ _ _

___Maddy: Good thing I blocked vulgar language on this chat._ _ _

___Nimi: I-_ _ _

___Nimi: I wanna join the FO now._ _ _

___Nimi: I’m scared of Poe’s taste in movies._ _ _


	103. Adventures In Babysitting pt3 (ft. Jannah, Temiri, Oniho, and Arashell)

Maddy: Are you sure this is a good idea?

Nimi: Of course not!

Maddy: Oh good.

Nimi invited Arashell

Nimi invited Temiri

Nimi invited Oniho

Nimi: Hey guys you wanna watch the footage of Arm failing

Arashell: Like a compilation? That would be 12 hours long.

Maddy: Oof-

Maddy: Can’t really argue with that one.

Nimi: We’re watching the security camera footage of the battle.

Arashell: Oh cool! Definitely!

Oniho: But we’re at the base and you’re on an FO ship.

Maddy: Hmm...I’ll go steal Gwen’s phone and we can video call you.

Arashell: Oh okay.

Temiri: Wait why are they on a FO ship?

Maddy: We’re babysitting while everyone watches Booksmart.

Temiri: ???

Maddy: That movie that you guys aren’t allowed to watch.

Temiri: Ohhhh Booksmart! I remember now.

Nimi: So instead we’re watching Arm fail at fighting.

Arashell: Y e s

Maddy: Ok hi guys. U have to type instead of talk bc we’re technically not allowed to be here.

Oniho: Wait, what???

Nimi: Just go with it.

Nimi: OMIGOD you actually got the footage from the hangar too!?!?! 

Arashell: Oh so that’s why Poe was complaining about PDA.

Oniho: What’s PDA?

Nimi: Wait don’t say it-

Arashell: Public displays of affection.

Arashell: Though it’s not really public.

Maddy: I-

Maddy: I mean she has a point.

Temiri: Ewww no, Poe’s right.

Nimi: I really don’t want to quote one of Kaydel’s memes, but NO ******* FIGHTING

Maddy: Hmm...I’d put my credits on Temiri, but only because he has a lightsaber.

Nimi: Wait...is there footage from the closet?

Maddy: Yea about that...

Arashell: OMIGOD YOU HAVE FOOTAGE OF EVERYONE IN THE CLOSET

Oniho: How did everyone even fit in there?

BeeBee: <That doesn’t seem humanly possible>

Niney: <Well evidently it’s humanly possible, because they’re doing it!>

Nimi: I’m not sure which is more wholesome, the footage, or the fact that Poe and Mitaka’s droids are arguing as much as Poe and Mitaka used to.

Arashell: *munches popcorn*

Temiri: *eyes popcorn*

Arashell: *hugs popcorn* NO

Temiri: *puppy dog eyes*

Arashell: *hisses* NO

Oniho: Can I have some?

Arashell: fine

Temiri: WHAT!?!?!?

Oniho: *sticks out tongue at Temiri*

Nimi: DON’T FIGHT

Maddy: I feel like everyone’s been fighting lately.

Maddy: Except for us. And Gwen. And Mitaka. And Jannah.

Oniho: Where is everyone going anyway? In the video?

Nimi: So Arm got really moody for some reason and now they’re gonna battle.

Arashell: Awww, Gwen brought Millicent!!!

Maddy: Oh yea we brought Millicent as well.

Maddy: Nimi I need to borrow the cat for a minute to show Arashell.

Nimi: NOOOOO DON’T TAKE THE CAT PLZ

Nimi: NO GIVE HER BACK MADDY

Maddy: I just wanted to show Arashell!

Maddy: Oh look it’s the good part where they start fighting.

Nimi invited Jannah

Jannah: What?

Nimi: Wanna watch Arm fail?

Jannah: Sure.

Nimi: Ok I’ll add you to the video call.

Nimi: Maddy you can unpause the movie now.

Temiri: Why does Arm think this is a good idea?

Jannah: I don’t know, but it’s entertaining.

Oniho: Kaydel’s not even paying attention lol

Jannah: Yea but there’s no point cause you know who’s gonna win.

Nimi:  🤣🤣🤣 I know someone just got shot, but the way Gwen starts SCREECHING at Arm is absolutely hilarious

Temiri: Why is she screaming about Arm breaking the rules when one of the rules is ‘be quiet’?

Jannah: I-

Jannah: Well you’re not wrong.

Maddy: Wait Jannah aren’t you supposed to be watching the movie?

Jannah: Yes but right now I’m hiding in a closet with Jessika.

Nimi: Wait Maddy the droids haven’t said anything for a while, and before we started the movie they were arguing like crazy.

Maddy: Oh force BEEBEE, NINEY, WHERE ARE YOU

Niney: <I am still here, but I refuse to talk to a Resistance droid>

BeeBee: <Well I’m not talking to you either!>

Niney: <Good! I don’t need you spouting off your idiotic ideas of rebellion>

BeeBee: <Excuse me, IDIOTIC? The only thing here that’s idiotic is you!>

Maddy: BEEBEE, NINEY, GO BACK TO BEING QUIET AGAIN


	104. Jannah’s Mission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for a slightly late chapter- didn’t have enough time to post it, I’m sorry y’all.

Maddy: ugh it’s only been half an hour and I’m ready to shoot myself

Nimi: Jannah can you ask Gwen where her earplugs are?

Jannah: She has earplugs?

Nimi: Yea for when she wants to ignore Arm and Ben fighting lol

Jannah: Oh

Jannah: I will leave the safety of the closet and brave the chaos of the movie night to ask Gwen where she hides her earplugs. Wish me luck.

Nimi: Is it really that bad?

Jannah: Nimi, have you ever been to a movie night with us?

Nimi: No?

Jannah: Then don’t talk about things you don’t understand. The second I step out of the closet, my life will be in danger.

Nimi: But isn’t the point of all of this to become friends regardless of what side you’re on in the war?

Jannah: Nimi, what did I just tell you?

Nimi: Don’t talk about things I don’t understand?

Jannah: Exactly.

BeeBee: <You shouldn’t even be friends to begin with!>

Jannah: Aww, you sound just like Poe used to before he stopped being an idiot.

Nimi: To be fair, he never really stopped being an idiot. He just stopped being an idiot about the FO/Resistance divide.

Niney: <As much as a despise the thought of agreeing with filthy rebels- especially one who is a traitorous stormtrooper -Poe Dameron of the Resistance IS an idiot>

Maddy: ENOUGH ARGUING

Maddy: Jannah! Status report!

Jannah: Yes captain! I have left the closet. Am currently hiding behind the couch where Arm and Rose are arguing. Again.

Jannah: Ducked to avoid popcorn that someone flicked. I can’t see Gwen yet.

Jannah: Aww, hi Jessika!

Jannah: She followed me.

Jannah: And now she flew off towards Zorii and Poe, who also seem to be arguing. Again.

Jannah: EWWWW PDA ALERT

Maddy: Why does everyone have to make such a big deal about it?

BeeBee: <Probably Poe and Finn again...>

Jannah: Actually no it’s Rey and Ben

Nimi: Figures.

Niney: <Who?>

Nimi: *sighs* FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME, NINEY, KYLO REN

Niney: <So the Supreme Leader and The Last Jedi are kissing?>

Jannah: YES AND I WOULD LIKE SOME BLEACH RIGHT NOW

Maddy: W-why?

Jannah: SO I DON’T HAVE TO WATCH

Maddy: Jannah just look away.

Niney: <But->

Niney: <Does not compute>

Maddy: Lol we forgot to tell Niney who’s dating who.

Nimi: I VOLUNTEER

Jannah: I CAN’T LOOK AWAY MADDY, GWEN’S WATCHING THE MOVIE RIGHT NEXT TO THEM

Jannah: WHERE DO YOU FIRST ORDER PEOPLE KEEP THE BLEACH

Nimi: Jannah you used to be a stormtrooper. Shouldn’t you know where stuff is?

Jannah: IT’S BEEN A WHILE OKAY?

Maddy: please turn off caps lock

Jannah: Fine. I’ve snuck past pretty much everyone...ooh popcorn!

Maddy: Jannah...

Jannah: I’m sorry, it’s my weakness!!

Jannah: Okay, I got Gwen’s attention.

Jannah: What was your question?

Maddy: *facepalm*

Nimi: Where does Gwen keep her earplugs?

Jannah: She says she brought them to movie night

Nimi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


	105. Post-Movie Night/Babysitting Disaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another late chapter! I’m so sorry everyone, I’ve been so focused on NaNoWriMo lately that I’ve been neglecting my AO3 works. Apologies ahead of time for any more late chapters.  
> Also, if anyone wants more chatroom chaos, check out part 3 of The Adventures Of Girlsquad series, The Imposter Inside. It’s basically a fic about everyone playing Among Us together, plus the usual fighting and craziness ;D

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Everyone

Maddy: So how was the movie night?

Jannah: It was great!

Rey: No Jannah, it was not great.

Nimi: What happened?

Rey: Well Poe and Zorii were fighting.

Maddy: I’m not even surprised.

Nimi: What was it about this time?

Arm: They were arguing about whether or not Kaydel looked like one of the characters.

Kaydel: IMMA GOLDEN STARFISH

Rey: Kaydel, no

Kaydel: SHUT UP YOU’RE NOT MY MOM

Nimi: Who won?

Gwen: Kaydel. She tossed Jessika at them and hid in the bathroom so they couldn’t compare her to the character.

Nimi: Is THAT why Poe was bleeding?

Poe: ...yes

Poe: I thought we agreed not to talk about this.

Maddy: Why-?

Ben: Jessika didn’t like it when Kaydel tossed her at them.

Rose: Oh, and THEN Gwen tried to start playing her knife game

Arm: I’m actually pretty good at it.

Mitaka: WHAT THE FORCE?!?!?!?!

Gwen: He was! Arm was really fast.

Zorii: You’d better not teach my child to play with knives!

Gwen: Says the gal who tried to drown someone!

Zorii: Correction- I pushed them in. I had no way of knowing either girl would drown.

Rey: You technically knew that I can’t swim.

Nimi: And if we were handcuffed, then it would be extremely hard NOT to drown.

Zorii: SILENCE PEASANTS

Kaydel: ok but Jannah don’t play with knives like Gwen

Mitaka: Why do Kaydel and Zorii treat Jannah like she’s their five-year-old daughter?

Arm: I mean she basically is.

Jannah: Excuse me, I’m SIX

Mitaka: I-

Ben: Anyway, how did droid-sitting go?

Maddy: ...the less said about it the better

Rose: Wow. Was it really that bad?

Maddy: YES

Jannah: Actually yes it was

Jannah: How well can droids keep secrets?

Rey: It depends on the droid- Threepio can’t keep a secret, but Artoo excels at secrets (not always a good thing)

Mitaka: But what about BeeBee?

Poe: If he wants to, yes.

Rose: Should we be worried about BB-9E?

Mitaka: Niney should keep our secrets.

Kaydel: ShOuLd

Nimi: Anyway, we’re not babysitting any more.


	106. Puffer Pigs

Zorii has started a chat room

Zorii invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: Rey, Rose, where r u guys?

Rey removed Rose

Rey: Double date

Jannah: Ooh juicy. Where?

Rey: This ‘Puffer Pig Bowling’ place

Arashell: WHAT? That’s animal abuse!  😡

Rey: No it’s not, the balls are just painted to look like puffer pigs

Kaydel: Headlines for tomorrow’s news: Force-sensitive saves bowling alley from angry child.

Nimi: Shouldn’t you be playing as well?

Rey: Rose and Arm are the only people who can actually play this game. I murdered too many fake puffer pigs during the first three turns.

Rey: But they’ve decided to make it more interesting- winner gets to keep Millicent at their base for the next two weeks.

Zorii: Oh my porgs, tell Rose if she loses we’re disowning her.

Rey: xD will do btw I’m totally not using the force to alter the course of Rose’s ball

Gwen: ARM IF YOU LOSE MADDY AND I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU

Maddy: Awww no fair why do you guys get an advantage.

Rey: Yea well Ben is doing the same thing to Arm’s ball. It’s ridiculous. And of course Arm and Rose are pretending not to notice at all.

Nimi: It’s amazing how much we all want Millicent.

Nimi: Does Poe know about the possible visit from Hux’s cat?

Kaydel: I doubt it xD

Rey: Of course he doesn’t when have we ever done anything with Poe’s permission?

Jannah: He loves Millicent, it won’t be a problem.

Arashell: What about Jessika?

Kaydel: ...good question, but Arashell we’re adopting you now.

Gwen: Oh no that will never end well

Maddy: I think Zorii and Kaydel have literally become the space moms

Maddy: They have adopted every child here

Nimi: Except for Poe

Zorii: Poe’s grown up.

Zorii: Not much.

Zorii: But improvement is improvement.


	107. Poe Needs Some Help

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Girlsquad

Poe: I really hate to say this...but I need your help.

Gwen: ...what the force?

Kaydel: Poe, I don’t think I heard you correctly the first time. Could you repeat that a little louder please?

Poe: Kaydel, don’t.

Kaydel: I’m sorry, what was that? I really can’t hear what you’re saying.

Poe: I need your help.

Kaydel: Jannah, did Poe just say what I think he said?

Jannah: Depends on what you think he said.

Kaydel: Can you say that ONE more time?

Poe: I hate you.

Poe: I REQUIRE THE ASSISTANCE OF GIRLSQUAD

Kaydel: Ohhhh so THAT’S what you were saying!

Rey: Alright Kaydel, we get it. What do you want?

Poe: Why do I feel like she’s pointing a lightsaber at me even though we’re not even on the same planet?

Rey: Poe.

Poe: Fine. I need your help to rickroll Hux.

Zorii: ...YES

Jannah: I’m in!

Rey: Sure, why not?

Rose: Y A S

Kaydel: You know what that is? Impressive.

Nimi: Um...okay?

  
Gwen: *evil laughter* yessssss

Maddy: This will be fun.

Arashell: Rick? Roll?

Kaydel: Oh you’ll see...


	108. Rickroll

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Girlsquad

Poe: Ok so how do we do this?

Kaydel: We need a huge speaker.

Poe: I don’t have one of those.

Arashell: WHAT IS A RICK ROLL

Kaydel: It’s when you trick someone into listening to Never Gonna Give You Up.

Arashell: WHY

Kaydel: Because

Arashell: Oh okay

Jannah: ROSE AND I WERE BUILDING A SPEAKER!!!!

Rey: Why???

Rose: Because we were bored and so the obvious remedy to boredom is building a huge speaker.

Jannah: That, or breaking the law.

Rose: Except I didn’t want to break the law so we went with the first option.

Gwen: The first Girlsquad member to ever make a mature choice and NOT break the law for once.

Jannah: Excuse me you committed...let’s see...patricide, matricide, fratricide, just plain murder in general...

Nimi: Fratricide???

Jannah: I had to look that one up, but yes.

Gwen: Excuse me you were a stormtrooper.

Rey: You’ve made a big mistake, Gwen.

Gwen: What?

Rey: Watch this....

Zorii: EXCUSE ME PHASMA AT LEAST JANNAH JOINED THE RESISTANCE NOW WHILE YOU’RE STILL WORKING FOR THE KRIFFING FIRST ORDER-

Gwen: lol that’s because the people in charge of the FO are idiots and I basically have to run the whole thing.

Rey: Hey!  😕

Gwen: Ok but you were there for the duel, you saw what I have to deal with.

Rey: Fair point.

Poe: GUYS focus

Kaydel: Ok so we need a huge speaker, a way to smuggle it into the FO, a very long cord to plug in said speaker-

Rose: Actually its wireless.

Kaydel: Ok so basically just the speaker, the song, and a way to smuggle it into the FO. We have all three.

Arashell: Wait we have a way to smuggle the speaker???

Kaydel: Rey get the Falcon ready.

Rey: oh force

Rey: It’s already ready tho.

Gwen: Zorii can you bring your force-blocking handcuffs with you?

Zorii: Of course heheheheh

Rey: oh FORCE

Gwen:  😏


	109. 🎵NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP🎵

Arm has started a chat room

Arm invited Everyone

Arm: Would anyone like to explain why Never Gonna Give You Up started playing when I walked into my room?

Poe: No

Kaydel: Not really

Gwen: Nope

Maddy: asdfghjkl what did I miss

Ben: You missed Hux screaming curses.

  
Ben: Also, who knew force-blocking handcuffs were a thing?

Gwen: ...

Zorii: ...

Maddy: Yea Zorii has a pair that she stole from Poe, except he stole them from her so she was just stealing them back, even though she only has them because she stole them from someone else.

Jannah: That made no sense.

Zorii: I didn’t steal them from someone else, someone made them for me!

Zorii: This happened years ago.

Kaydel: Zorii that’s sus  😂

Nimi: I had nothing to do with this. I was dragged along.

Arm: That’s actually believable though because you seem to get dragged along with everything.

Nimi: Exactly!

Kaydel: That’s because you’re no fun.

Arashell: I don’t own force-blocking handcuffs. I didn’t even know they existed until a few days ago when we all got thrown in the brig.

Ben: Wait what???

Rey: It’s a long story. Jannah wanted her Nutella back, Poe stole it, we all got thrown in jail.

Rose: It was fun!

Rey: Gwen and Maddy had to break us out.

Ben: You’re kidding.

Arm: I have a picture if you need proof.

Rey: Armitage Hux, don’t you dare-

Arm: I sent it

Rey: Poe I need permission to use the Falcon for a few days.

Arm:  😳

Gwen: Yay! Bring the rest of Girlsquad too! We can have a sleepover with the cat!

Arm: Yea that was my other question- WHERE IS MY CAT!?!?!?!

Gwen: So...

Gwen: She’s totally not in my room rn.

Kaydel: Otherwise she was gonna set off the motion detector and the song would play.

Arm: So you had Phasma kidnap my cat?!?!?

Kaydel: ...basically.

Ben: Is no one going to talk about the force-blocking handcuffs!?!?

Zorii: Sure.

  
Zorii: So they worked?

Ben: Obviously.

Zorii: Good. Told you they’d work, Gwen.

Gwen: Fine.

Zorii: So you have my wookie cookies?

Gwen: *sighs* yes

Ben: What?

Gwen: I bet Zorii the binders wouldn’t work.

Zorii: HAHAHAHA THE WOOKIE COOKIES ARE MINE NOW

Rey: Ok but no more force-blocking handcuffs Zorii.

Zorii: Yea ok

Zorii: As long as Phasma pays up.

Mitaka: Gwen can I come over to see the cat? And you?

  
Gwen: Sure.

Gwen: Everyone except Hux is invited to my room to play with the cat.

Poe: Including us?

Gwen: Yea of course.

Rose: xDDD MILLICENT HAS TURNED POE TO THE CAT SIDE

Poe: It took you this long to realize?

Jannah: lol Rey get the Falcon ready. Again.

Arashell: YES! FO trip!

Arm: EXCUSE ME NO COMING TO THE FIRST ORDER UNLESS YOU APOLOGIZE FOR RICKROLLING ME

Ben: You do realize that you’re talking to Girlsquad, and they are absolutely going to ignore any attempts to prevent them from visiting?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The new LEGO Christmas special comes out today! If you watch it, enjoy! (Don’t forget to watch for Kaydel Naruto running in the background 😂😂😂)


	110. Let’s Settle This

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel named chat  Let’s Settle This

Kaydel invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: Ladies, I have gathered you here today because the time has come...

Arashell: What time?

Kaydel: For us to decide once and for all, the answer to a question that has stumped this galaxy for ages...

Nimi: Is Kaydel actually being serious for once?

Kaydel: There will be arguments. There will be fights. Let’s settle this like women.

Rose: I’m lowkey scared, anyone else?

Kaydel: Best Disney song of all time. Go.

Rey: Reflection from Mulan  😊

Maddy: I haven’t seen many Disney movies, but Gwen made me watch Coco and I loved the Remember Me song.

Rose: Hmm...I’m gonna have to go with...Colors of the Wind, from Pocahontas. Either that or Speechless!

Zorii: BE PREPARED IS THE BEST DISNEY SONG OF ALL TIME

Zorii: FIGHT ME

Jannah: hmmm...I’m gonna have to say Touch The Sky, mostly because Merida rides a horse and uses a bow so like-

Jannah: She’s my long-lost twin sister.

Nimi: I’m gonna have to say Friends On The Other Side. It creeps me out, but I love it.

Kaydel: Ok but

Kaydel: THE SIAMESE CAT SONG IS SUPERIOR

Kaydel: Actually I do like that one song from Moana, How Far I’ll Go.

Rose: Notice how Gwen hasn’t spoken yet because she’s thinking of a really obscure Disney movie and a really obscure song.

Arashell: I like Once Upon A Dream. That, or Under The Sea. Or Into The Unknown. Actually, I like all of them.

Jannah: Guys we need to get some other opinions in here.

Jannah invited Poe

Rose invited Book Nerds

Poe: What’s this?

Kaydel: Favorite Disney song. Go.

Poe: Hmm...

Mitaka: There’s too many of them!

Mitaka: Go The Distance. From Hercules.

  
Arm: Be Prepared.

Zorii: YESSSS!!!!!! I KNOW, RIGHT?

Arm: This is the first and last time I agree with Zorii.

Zorii: Same here.

Poe: One Jump Ahead, from Aladdin.

Rose: Yeah I see the similarities  😏

Poe: ???

Rose: You’re both outlaws.

Poe: Excuse me, you hang out with Zorii.

Zorii: Excuse me, I heard that, and I have binders.

Ben: Friends on the Other Side.

Nimi:  ⬆️ That’s an educated Disney fan right there

Kaydel: Guys the actual Disney Princess has not spoken yet.

Kaydel: Gwen what’s the best Disney song of all time?

Gwen: I like the second version of For The First Time In Forever where Anna and Elsa are arguing, because it’s fun to sing in the shower and it’s the galaxy’s most accurate representation of my brain at 2am.


	111. Game Night!

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Everyone

Kaydel: Let’s play a game!

Rey: NO KISS MARRY KILL

Nimi: NO SPIN THE BOTTLE

Rose: NO GLITTER WARS

Kaydel: Relax, it’s just a card game.

Zorii: Oh okay.

Nimi: Then what is it?

Kaydel: It’s a game called...

Gwen: Ok Kaydel you’ve left us hanging for at least fifteen minutes.

Rey: Also, this needs to be an APPROPRIATE game. There are children here!

Arm: You need to accept that Kaydel and Zorii have corrupted the minds of everyone here.

Jannah: If you draw the number 3 fast enough it looks like a butt.

Arm: My point exactly.

Kaydel: It’s called...WHO’S MOST LIKELY TO?

Ben: In all caps?

Kaydel: no I just accidentally hit caps lock

Mitaka: KAYDEL I HAVE PLAYED THIS GAME BEFORE

Mitaka: THIS DEFINITELY FALLS UNDER REY’S CORRUPTION CATEGORY

Kaydel: Fine Imma censor the cards.

Kaydel: Also we’re not playing by the rules. Imma read a card to y’all and whoever says ‘gonk’ first gets to answer. Just say it, even if you have no clue what made you say it.

Arashell: That makes sense.

Jannah: Except Kaydel’s running the game so none of this will make sense.

Zorii: Excuse me how dare you disrespect my girlfriend

Jannah: Sorry mom

Mitaka: I-

Gwen: Don’t question it.

Kaydel: ASDFGHJKL SHUT UP I’M READING THE FIRST QUESTION

Kaydel: Who’s most likely to...buy Dino Nuggets?

Zorii: GONK

Zorii: POE DAMERON

Poe: I-

Poe: I can explain.

Nimi: *evil laughtering* ahhh yes this should be a fun game.

Kaydel: Who’s most likely to...ask questions throughout the ENTIRE movie?

Poe: Gonk!

Poe: Finn can’t follow a plot line to save his life lol

Arashell: EXPOSED

Finn: Why do I even get added to these stupid chats.

Rose: STUPID? EXCUSE ME? *grabs electro prod* YOU WANNA GET STUNNED AGAIN!?!?!?!

Zorii: NO ******* FIGHTING

Maddy: It’s official. Everyone is fighting now.

Mitaka: I’m not!

Arashell: Same!

Temiri: Not me.

Oniho: Me neither.

Arashell: Um yes you are you and Tem were fighting earlier today

Rey: NO

Rey: Just stop before it turns into another duel.

Kaydel: Aaaaand moving on! Who...always wants to light stuff on fire?

Gwen: Gonk.

Gwen: Zorii.

Zorii: I won’t deny that.

Zorii: Yesterday I found out there’s enough oil in the mess hall’s mystery meat to make it extremely flammable.

Temiri: Ewww I am never eating mystery meat again.

Kaydel: Who...quotes movies no one has seen?

Jannah: Gonk!

Jannah: The entire kriffing Book Club.

Nimi: Language!

Gwen: Ooh, I know that one! That was Steve Rogers, wasn’t it?

Nimi: ???

Kaydel: Who...cried when Mufasa died?

Ben: Gonk.

Arm: NONONONO

Ben: Armitage Hux.

Mitaka: WHAT

Arm: I...did.

Gwen: You literally murdered your father!?!

Ben: Says you.

Rey: Says you.

Zorii: Says you.

Maddy: Says...nevermind, I don’t think you murdered any family members.

Zorii: I didn’t.

Poe: Oh good. There’s at least ONE person here who hasn’t murdered a relative.

Kaydel: eheheheheh this is a good one.

Kaydel: Who’s most likely to...find a reason to take their shirt off?

Arashell: ...what?

Temiri: Not me!

Oniho: EW

Rose: I know who has the answer.

Rey: no

Rose: Say it.

Rey: no.

Rose: Say the word. G-o-n-k

Rey: No.

Rose: Rey I’m going to steal your phone.

Rey: ROSEDONTYOUDARE-

Rey: GONK GONK GONK

Arm: I’m confused. Was that Rey or Rose?

Nimi: That was Rose. They’re currently fighting over the phone. It’s quite entertaining.

Nimi: Rey’s winning.

Nimi: Now Rose is.

Nimi: Now Kaydel tossed Jessika at them.

Kaydel: Rey, you said gonk. We need you to answer.

Rey: nononono please give it to someone else, Rose said it!

Kaydel: Rules are rules.

Rey: ... 😭 please Kaydel why do you have to choose now to follow the rules?

Kaydel: I’ll repeat the question: who’s most likely to find a reason to take their shirt off?

Rey: kaydel please no

Zorii: I’m very confused. Why is she so upset?

Jannah: JUST ANSWER I want to see why Rose is laughing her head off like a maniac and Rey is blushing redder than Mustafar

Rey: ...ben

Rose: AHAHAHHAHAHA

Jannah: oh

Zorii: What???

Rey: We’re not discussing this.

Kaydel: As much as I’d like to continue this discussion, who’s most likely to...get totally lost but have a great time anyway?

Maddy: Gonk

Maddy: Gwen.

Gwen: I don’t even know where I am right now.

Gwen: I’m sitting in some forgotten corner of a Dreadnought.

Gwen: Hey Arm, can you get Millicent to like, track me down using her sense of smell?

Poe: That’s DOGS, Gwen.

Gwen: Well I knew it was one of ‘em.

Gwen: Fifty percent chance.

Arm: I’m kind of hoping you’ll stay lost. 

Ben: At least I won’t have to hear your shower concerts anymore.

Arm: But did you hear her the other day? 

Ben: Wasn’t she singing that Cups song?

Arm: Yea, and doing the cup part with the soap!

Gwen: The second I manage to get un-lost, Imma kill both of you.

Kaydel: Ooh here’s a hard one! Who’s most likely to...have never broken the law?

Temiri: Gonk.

Kaydel: Wow that was faster than I expected.

Temiri: None of us.

Mitaka: Well you’re not wrong.

Nimi: Okay guys, I think that’s it for tonight. Gwen’s gotta get un-lost, someone’s gotta put out the mystery meat Zorii set on fire, Poe’s gotta get himself some more Dino Nuggies, Ben’s gotta find a shirt, Jannah’s gotta stop cursing, everyone needs to stop murdering their families, and SERIOUSLY GUYS WE NEED TO STOP BREAKING THE LAW

Kaydel: But then life’s no fun!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT NOTE: The idea to say ‘gonk’ to answer questions was not my idea. It came from the Star Wars podcast Women of the Whills, the Clone Wars Family Feud episode, I believe. All credit for that idea goes to THEM. If that is technically illegal, please tell me in the comments and I can change it right away.


	112. Kaydel and Zorii’s Idea

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Everyone

Zorii: We just had a stupid idea.

Rose: *yawns* what else is new?

Kaydel: It’s a pretty fun one though!

Ben: If it’s glitter blasters again, I’m out.

Kaydel: Not glitter blasters, promise! Though we might be able to use them...

Rose: Anything involving glitter blasters I will do.

Nimi: But what’s the idea?

Zorii: *takes deep breath*

Kaydel: WE DECLARE WAR ON ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!!!

Gwen: ...

Finn: ...

Rey: What?

Arm: Why?

Arashell: Aren’t we already at war?

Jannah: This seems dangerous.

Zorii: WELL NO ONE’S ACTUALLY GOING TO DIE

Jannah: Oh, then sure.

Mitaka: How will this work?

Kaydel: Well most of us could fight and then some people can video the whole thing...

Gwen: OMIGOD LIKE THE HUNGER GAMES

Maddy: Leave it to Gwen to turn this into a book thing.

Arashell: What’s the hungry games?

Kaydel: Can I tell her?

Poe: No, you’re gonna make it weird. Might wanna leave this one to the book nerds

Ben: The Hunger Games is a book series.

Arm: YOU HAVE TO READ IT!!!!!

Arm: GUYS LET’S GET TOGETHER FOR ANOTHER MOVIE NIGHT W/ COSTUMES ARASHELL CAN BE PRIM

Rose: And here we go again...

Rey: Basically, the Hunger Games is set in this destroyed world, where there’s 12 Districts and they’re ruled by the Capitol. Except the Capitol isn’t a good ruler. Like the First Order.

Mitaka: Hey!

Rey: Fine, the Capitol isn’t a good ruler, like the Empire. Happy?

Mitaka: Yep.

Ben: Not really-

Rey: So every year, the Capitol makes the districts pick two kids’ names from a hat, one boy and one girl from each district. And they all go to the Capitol for a few days for the tribute parade and training and interviews...and then they all get thrown into an arena with a bunch of weapons and food and traps. Everyone has to fight to the death, and the last person alive wins. It’s all very messed up.

Arashell: WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO KILL EACH OTHER??????

Finn: umm...we’re probably not going to actually kill each other. Right?

Zorii: But that would make it so much more fun!

Gwen: *whispers* if we do have this movie night, I think Zorii should be Snow.

Kaydel: Zorii, no murder. We’ll just fight until someone surrenders or something, idk. Or until someone gets knocked out. Idk.

Rey: That’s slightly unfair.

Maddy: ???

Rose:  🤣 she’s right

Poe: Someone explain what’s going on.

Ben: The second one’s unfair cause I’d win  😂

Arm: Oh wow xDDD good point

Kaydel: You book nerds have weird jokes.

Mitaka: Says the meme lady.


	113. The ‘Reaping’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A war during a war...🤨🤔

Rey has started a chatroom

Rey invited Everyone

Rey: So if Zorii and Kaydel really have started a war, and if there’s going to be people videoing...who’s doing what?

Temiri: What war?

Kaydel: Oops sry, I didn’t have ur contact so u weren’t in the last discussion! We’re going to do a Hunger Games and stuff. It’s gonna be stupid and FUN!

Rose: Okay, I wrote down everyone’s names. Does anyone DEFINITELY NOT want to be in the ‘reaping pool’? That means you’re videoing/watching to make sure no one’s breaking the rules and doing illegal stuff. Also designing the battlefield I guess. Choosing a place to go and creating boundaries and obstacles and stuff.

Poe: I kind of want to help design the battlefield.

Gwen: I’ll help with the not breaking rules part.

Maddy: Same.

Rose: Alright. Anyone else NOT want to be in the ‘reaping pool’?

Kaydel: I think we’re all good.

Rose: Okay...I’m sending you guys a video too so you know it’s not rigged.

Zorii: This is supposed to be a war not a Hunger Games.

Jannah: Yea but we have to find jobs for everyone and stuff and choosing out of a hat is pretty easy way of doing it.

Zorii: True.

Ben: Guys, everyone take a video of themselves watching the reaping and their reactions and we can use them for the video.

Nimi: Ooh yess!!!!! I hope I get to video...

  
Arm: Hmm...I really don’t know what I want haha!

Rose: *clears throat*

Jannah: *points spotlight on Rose*

Gwen: *wonders where everyone keeps getting spotlights from*

Rose: Alright everyone. As you all know, Zorii and Kaydel have declared a war. Now it’s time to find out who will be fighting in it... and yes, I’m both typing this and reading it out loud for my camera.

Maddy: *laughs nervously*

Arashell: *crosses fingers*

Zorii: I DON’T WANNA DIEEEEE

Rose: And our first fighter, please welcome...Miss Kaydel Ko Connix of Dulathia!

Kaydel: *moans* Look after Jessika for me, okay Zorii?

Zorii: *hugs Kaydel* Of course. I love you.

Kaydel: I know  ❤️

Rose: What a touching goodbye! Let’s hope these two girls are reunited after the war...but first we’ll have to meet our other fighters! Our next fighter...Ben Solo of Chandrila!

Ben: Oh. Force.

Ben: Well, guess I’m in this thing. *shrugs*

Rose: The words of a soldier ready to fight! Let’s see who his opponents will be! Next is...Arashell Sar of Canto Bight!

Arashell: Uh-oh.

Rose: Well Arashell seems a little outmatched age-wise, but I trust she’s got some surprises in store for us! Now...will Temiri Blagg, also of Canto Bight, please join her on our virtual stage?

Temiri: Uhh...sure? I mean technically I have to, right?

Rose: Right. Um. Anyway...our next tribute is...Rey of Jakku!

Rey:  😕

Rose: Excellent, uh...choice of emoji? (help me out here you guys) Well, time for another fighter...Zorii Bliss of Kijimi!

Zorii: ... 😭

Zorii: Jannah, can you take care of Jessika for us?

Jannah: Of course. I’m cheering for you two  💔😘

Rose: Another touching goodbye...I’m getting a little teary-eyed myself! Welp, next up...wow, you three have terrible luck, you know that? Jannah of Kef Bir!

  
Jannah: I would ask someone to take care of Jessika, but then they’d get chosen.

Rose: Probably true. Well anyway, Imma pull another name...and it’s Dopheld Mitaka!

Gwen: *dabs away tears*

Mitaka: *hugs Gwen*

Mitaka: I love you  😘

Gwen: I know  😘

Ben: Anyone else feel like that line is getting really overused?

Rose: Well yes, but I have to act professional and choose names and stuff.

Rose: Anyway, this will definitely be interesting...as most Kaydel and Zorii ideas often are!


	114. Behind The Scenes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters may be slightly more serious just to set up the war, before it turns into chaos and crack again.

Mitaka has started a chatroom

Mitaka invited Everyone

Mitaka: Okay, we need to figure out what everyone else will do. Cause we have the soldiers(?), but that’s all.

Maddy: I’ll make sure no one’s breaking the rules! (*coughs* Zorii *coughs* and Kaydel *coughs*

Poe: Can I help design the battlefield?

Zorii: Sure.

Gwen: I’ll help Maddy with the rules.

Arm: Yes, definitely!

Nimi: Hmm...I was thinking about being a videographer, if that’s okay?

Kaydel: Of course Nimi!

Rose: Ooh, can I help with design?

Finn: Agreed, that does sound fun.

Arm: I might do the video if no one else wants to.

Oniho: Can I fight? My name wasn’t in the hat whenever Rose picked names.

Zorii: Sure!

Jannah: Ooh guys can we form teams or something? Like different armies?

Zorii: YASS THE GIRLS OF CHAOS WILL RISE!!!!!!

Kaydel: ALSO JANNAH THANK YOU FOR TAKING CARE OF JESSIKA!!!!!!

Zorii: EVEN IF IT ONLY LASTED LIKE TWO SECONDS!!!!!

JANNAH: NO PROBLEM YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!!!!!

Oniho: Temiri can we be partners?

Temiri: Ya!!!!!

Arashell: But... 😕

Gwen: I can help you practice for when the war starts, Arashell  🙂

Arashell:  ☺️ thanks Gwen

Gwen: Anytime :)

Arm: And may the odds be EVER in your favor!


	115. Chaos Strategy

Zorii has started a chatroom

Zorii invited Jannah

Zorii invited Kaydel

Zorii: I think we can all agree that the three of us are gonna be an army?

Kaydel: Yeah, definitely.

Jannah: Wait, me too? Really?

Kaydel: Are you kidding me? Of course you’re invited! I mean, you can still say no.

Jannah: No way! I’d love to be part of ur army  😁

Zorii: So...do you guys want to idk talk strategy or something how do you even do this?

Kaydel: I guess we talk strategy?

Zorii: Well I just read the first Hunger Games, cause well Rose and Poe are both HG fans so they’re probably going to model the battlefield after a Hunger Games arena. So apparently you don’t want to run into the Bloodbath (which happens right after the Games start and everyone fights for the supplies) because there’s a high chance you’ll die.

Kaydel: Makes sense. So IF they design the battlefield after an HG arena...what if we just run in, grab the first thing we see, run out, hide until everyone is finished picking out supplies, and then take what’s left?

Jannah: That’s logical. We’re technically at a disadvantage because none of us are part of the book nerds group who knows a ton about the Hunger Games, so we should probably all read at least the first book.

Zorii: Good idea. Umm...does anyone know how hardcore this whole thing is gonna be? Like, will it be a few weeks of us all trying to murder each other? Or a day? Or an hour?

Jannah: I have no clue. I don’t think it’ll last that long, but Rose set aside four or five days on her calendar.

Kaydel: Umm so we’re talking about our fake war...what about the real one? Basically: what will the rest of the First Order and Resistance be doing while we host our war?

Zorii: WE SHOULD INVITE THEM TO WATCH!!!!!!!

Jannah: YESSS!!!!

Kaydel: DEFINITELY!!! Except they may wonder what’s going on, why we’re all friends, etc...

Zorii: I’ve got an idea about that. We get one of the video peeps, who will be videoing it, to broadcast it live to the Resistance and Fo.

Jannah: OOH PERFECT!!!!!! Which video person tho?

Kaydel: Nimi Chireen.

Jannah: NIMI? You serious?

Kaydel: Well Arm will refuse. Plus, Nimi loves fun. Also, she’s the only Girlsquad member who’s videoing. Girlsquad is very good at getting in trouble and making stupid plans.

Zorii: That’s fair. Let’s go blackmail Nimi!

Jannah: Or we could just ask her...?

Zorii: Well that’s what we’ll do but blackmail just sounds better than ‘let’s go ask Nimi’.

Jannah: Oh. Makes more sense now.


	116. Dyad Strategy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a really short chapter, I’m sorryyyy, but I was busy working on my 25Days challenge (trying to write a Christmas-themed fic each day based off of a one-word prompt)

Rey has started a chatroom

Rey invited Ben

Rey: Should I assume that we’re partners?

Ben: Yeah, that’s the plan.

Rey: First, I would like to suggest a possible addition to our alliance.

Ben: Who? Mitaka? Or Jannah?

Rey: Neither, but u can invite Mitaka if u want. I think Jannah’s working w/ Kaydel and Zorii. 

Ben: I think Mitaka’s just gonna work on his own anyway. So who?

Rey: So on the chat, Oniho immediately asked to be Temiri’s ally, and they were like Dream Team or something. And Arashell was rly left out. So far, they haven’t asked her about being part of their army either, even though both boys have been hanging out w/ her, tho not as much as usual. They’re both busy planning and stuff. She keeps dropping hints but they’re either ignoring them or they seriously haven’t noticed. Let’s at least ask Arashell if she’ll join? 

Ben: Ooh, yes, let’s definitely ask Arashell. I was gonna say something about Temiri and Oniho on the chat, but Gwen managed to cheer her up so I just forgot about it. Added bonus: strength in numbers.

Rey: I can ask Gwen right now, she and Arashell are sorta working together...

Rey: She said she and Arashell would love to join.

Ben invited Arashell

Ben invited Gwen

Gwen: So you’re forming an alliance?

Ben: If you two want.

Arashell:  😃

Rey: We’ll take that as a yes :)

Gwen: If u guys are gonna team up, I have to help draft rules 4 u all to follow. Arashell, u ok w/ that?

Arashell:  👍

Gwen: Ight u guys have fun. See ya suckers!

Gwen has left the chat


	117. Kids Strategy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried. I’m not very happy with how this chapter turned out, but I tried.  
> Also, because Mitaka’s basically working by himself right now, he doesn’t get a chat, but I think he may join Oniho and Temiri later?

Oniho has started a chatroom

Oniho invited Temiri

Temiri: So we’re going to be a team for the war?

Oniho: Ya!

Temiri: What do you want to do?

Oniho: Idk...we could hide and sneak up on everyone cause everyone else is older.

Temiri: Oh ya. Arashell’s the only one our age.

Temiri: What if we hide in a tree? Where are we fighting?

Oniho: I don’t know. Only the designers and videoers do, cause they’re planning the whole thing.

Temiri: I heard Poe say something about tooka cats...

Oniho: Where do they live...?

Temiri: Arashell probably knows where they live.

Oniho: But she won’t talk to me

Temiri: Ya same.

Temiri: She’s always talking to Gwen.

Oniho: Well Gwen said she would train her.

Temiri: I know, I know  🙄

Oniho: Do you think we should try to attack everyone?

Temiri: No. Everyone is bigger and faster.

Oniho: Okay. What if we get cornered?

Temiri: Probably just run. Can’t really fight anyone fairly, just Arashell.

Oniho: True. Anything else?

Temiri: Idk I don’t really know what this even is. Is it a big battlefield, small battlefield?

Oniho: I told you I don’t know, only the designers and video people do!  🙄

Temiri: Okay. Should we ask Arashell about the tooka cats?

Oniho: ...You can ask her about it.

Oniho: I don’t want to face an angry Arashell. I like living.


	118. Domination Army

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *minor spoilers for Mandalorian Season Two’s The Tragedy*   
> If you look closely at the background. You will find blue butterflies. 🖤🦋

Gwen has started a chatroom

Gwen invited DOMINATING ARMY

Rey: Wow.

Rey: Why am I not surprised by the name?

Ben: Probably because you Girlsquad members are insane and think of crazy names for everything.

Arashell: *Domination Army Squad

Gwen:  😁 Everything does seem to be a squad

Rey: WE HAVE ENOUGH SQUADS

Ben: oof

Gwen: Okie day, Imma go work on the rules some more. See ya!

Rey: ...Why did you even create this chatroom then? Anyway, I think we should all learn how to text without looking at our screens, so we can text while running or something.

Arashell: Yea. And we could find a place to meet up once we’re on the ‘battlefield’. And build a base!

Ben: Guys, I think Arm actually means business and will have a fairly large battlefield (I mean it’ll probably just be a roped-off area) but umm he was talking about tookas and also finding shovels. So just...idk don’t step in piles of leaves or something cause they might be hiding pits? Full of tookas?  😂

Arashell: We could technically just pull each other out. A pit of tookas just sounds adorable though! (And slightly dangerous, but still cute)

Rey: Smart. Will we be able to text when ur in the arena?

Ben: We’re allowed to, already asked Arm.

Arashell: Umm...Temi just asked about tooka cats???????

Arashell: What do I say?

Ben: Whatever you want, I guess.

Rey: Temi?

Arashell: The 3 of us have nicknames for each other

Arashell: don’t tell Rose

Rey: haha, of course not  😁

Ben: Too late.

Arashell:  😡

Ben: I’m kidding!

Rey: We do not kid around when it comes to Rose and her shipping.


	119. Hypothetical Fires

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This doesn’t really have anything to do with the war, I was just going through the random memes I’d saved and had the idea to write this 😂

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Girlsquad

Kaydel: What did we do this time?

Poe: Nothing, I just have a question.

Kaydel: Oh good.

Poe: The base is on fire. What do you grab?

Jannah: THE BASE IS ON FIRE!?!?!?!

Poe: NO it’s just hypothetical.

Zorii: Thank the force, I left all my weapons there.

Poe: wait where are you

Zorii: uhhh....so about that.

Poe: You know what, nevermind. Just answer my question: the base is on fire. What do you grab?

Kaydel: My hairbrush!

Jannah: I don’t know...

Jannah: Oh! My Nutella!

Rose: Millicent. Or Jessika, if Millie isn’t at the base.

Zorii: My binders. Or Kaydel.

Gwen: LET IT BURNNNNNNNN

Gwen: I’m FO anyway so I don’t have anything of value there aside from Girlsquad.

Nimi: My history books.

Arashell: Temiri and Oniho!

Rey: Guys.

Rey: I’d grab the fire extinguisher.

Zorii: I-

Zorii: Oh yea


	120. Hacking Girlsquad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter also doesn’t have anything to do with the war, it’s just everyone taking a break from planning to have some fun ;D

Arm has started a chatroom

Arm invited Ben

Arm invited Mitaka

Arm: Do you guys ever wonder what happens at Girlsquad meetings?

Ben: Oh no, why do I get the feeling you’ve got another stupid idea?

Mitaka: What are u saying Arm?

Arm: Let’s hack a Girlsquad meeting.

Mitaka: Stupid, dangerous, could get us all killed by Gwen. Let’s do it! Except idk how u hack into a chatroom.

Arm: Oh yea they’re the only ones who’ve figured out how to really do that.

Ben: No, I can do it. I just refuse to. Do you seriously want to have to go into hiding because Girlsquad is after us?

Mitaka: Just don’t get caught.

Arm: Yeah, we just keep quiet and observe, and don’t get caught!

Ben: ...fine but this is a terrible idea.

** So Then They All Hack Into The Meeting... **

Gwen: -and then he goes ‘stop flirting with my gf, Hux.’

Rose:  🤣

Gwen: Arm’s expression was HILARIOUS

Nimi: xDD I can totally picture that lmho

Gwen: It was like, a mix of Kaydel and Zorii’s porg, and that one meme Kaydel sent us yesterday

Rey: ouch  😂

Maddy: You guys NEED to come visit us in the FO.

Jannah: That would be so cool!

Zorii: Only if Jessika is invited.

Maddy: Are you kidding me? You better bring the porg!

Rose: Can we watch a movie?

Gwen: YASS we could have a sleepover!

Rey: What do you even do at a sleepover?

Kaydel: You stay up really late talking and doing each other’s nails and stuff. Tallie and I would have sleepovers sometimes.

Nimi: Ooh I can bring nail polish!

Arashell: Yay! I’ve never painted my nails before!

Kaydel: And we can prank the guys!

Zorii: Two words. Glitter. Blasters.

Rose: I SAY WE STEAL THE KITTY!

Gwen: What if the kitty eats the porg?

Jannah: Kaydel and Zorii will protect their child

Maddy: THEN LET’S STEAL THE KITTY!!!!

Arm: IF YOU STEAL MILLICENT I WILL SEND THE ENTIRE FIRST ORDER AFTER YOU!!!!!!

Mitaka: Keep quiet and observe, he says...

Nimi: What the heck????? What are you doing here????

Arashell: Did you add them to the Girlsquad list accidentally?

Zorii: No, they aren’t on the list.

Mitaka: WE HACKED IT!!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Rey: But you guys don’t know how to hack a chatr- oh. oh.  😡

Kaydel: Are we missing something?

Rey: Stupid Force Bond.

Arm: Seriously?

Ben: ...

Mitaka:  🤣 wow

Gwen: Rose you’re gonna have to start putting up the walls whenever we have a meeting.

Mitaka: VIRTUAL WALLS DO NOT STOP US!!!!!

Jannah: Rose’s code walls are impenetrable.

Ben: We shall see. We shall see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you’re looking for more cracky chats involving the gals of Star Wars, I wrote another chat room story called The Rise of Chaos...and it’s exactly what the title says.


	121. The Silent Treatment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reylo was the number 1 Tumblr ship of 2020!!! 🥳🎉🖤

Ben has started a chat room

Ben invited Domination Army

Rey: I’m not talking to you.

Ben: It was Hux’s idea!

Ben: It was just a joke!

Ben: Rey? Are you still there?

Arashell: She told me to tell you she already said she wouldn’t talk to you.

Ben: Kriff.

Ben: Rey?

Rose: She’s being stubborn. Again.

Ben: Rose? What are you even doing here?

Rose: I figured that someone needed to keep this conversation going.

Ben: I hate it when you’re right.

Rose: You must be angry often.

Arashell:  😂

Ben: Oh come on, three against one? Not fair!

Rose: Fine, I’ll leave, but y’all better make up before the war. I put good money on you three.

Arashell: You’re betting?!

Rose: Yea, I’m betting you’ll win, Nimi thinks it’ll be Zorii and Kaydel and Jannah.

Arashell: What’s at stake?

Rose: 20 credits and the Frozen soundtrack.

Arashell: Where’d you get the Frozen soundtrack?

Rose: Gwen has two.

Arashell: Of course she does.

Rose: *did. Whoever wins the bet gets the music. And obviously the money.

Ben: Rey? You still not talking?

Arashell: she said to tell you that she’s not talking to you

Ben: Force.

Ben: Rey, don’t make me resort to desperate measures.

Rose: Arashell did she say anything?

Arashell: No but now she’s blushing.

Arashell: Now she’s hiding under a blanket.

Ben: Arashell, are you guys at base?

Arashell: I’m not supposed to say.

Rose: They’re off-base right now. On a mission. In the Falcon. I’m pretty sure they’re on Batuu?

Arashell: Rose, Rey asked me to let you know that she’s gonna murder you later.

Rose: *shrugs* I’ve gotten three similar death threats already this week.

Ben: Three?

Rose: Yea, one from Arm cause I stole his cat, one from Nimi cause I was helping Kaydel and Zorii try to spray paint Poe’s x-wing, and then one from Poe after he saw the x-wing.

Ben: oh wow

Rose: Anyway, I got the coordinates to where they are. I can send them to u

Ben: Please do.

Arashell: I’m confused

Arashell: What are ‘desperate measures’?

Rose: ...you don’t need to know that until you’re older.

Rose: Just...leave the room immediately.

Rose: Go hide in the floor or something.

Arashell: Oh force is someone gonna die?!?!

Rose: no. you just don’t need to know what desperate measures are yet.

Arashell: Okay... 

Ben: Rose being responsible for once.

Rose: It’s basic self-preservation. Nimi would kill me if I didn’t say anything.

Nimi: She’s not wrong.

Nimi: Anyway, at least that’s one less couple fighting for now.


	122. Blackmailing Nimi

Jannah has started a chatroom

Jannah invited CHAOS ARMY

Zorii: Ready to go blackmail Nimi?

Jannah: In the wise words of Kaydel, les do trains!

Kaydel: Really guys why won’t anyone let that go?

Kaydel invited Nimi

Nimi: What have I walked into this ti- WHY AM I BEING BLACKMAILED?!?!?!?!

Jannah: Ur not, it just sounds cooler.

Nimi: mhmmmm...

Zorii: No seriously, we’re not blackmailing you.

Nimi: What do you want?

Kaydel: So...we had this idea...

Nimi: Does it involve explosives?

Zorii: No.

Nimi: Poisonous animals?

Jannah: No.

Nimi: Poe getting very angry at us?

Kaydel: Probably, yes.

Nimi: Someone in Girlsquad killing someone else, who is probably also in Girlsquad?

Jannah: Probably.

Nimi: I’m in!

Zorii: Great! So you know how the whole war thingy is going to be recorded?

Nimi: Yeah. I’m recording it, remember?

Kaydel: Well of course we remembered, that’s why we’re blackmailing you.

Jannah: Can you broadcast the video live to the Resistance and FO?

Nimi: Hmm...what if I do you one better and broadcast it live to the entire GALAXY?

Zorii: YASSSSSS!!!!

Jannah: YOU’D REALLY DO THAT??

Nimi: Of COURSE!!!! Just to see the look on Arm’s face when he figures out...would be PRICELESS

Zorii: Okay, but you can’t tell ANYONE

Nimi: Cross my heart

Jannah: This will be EPIC

Kaydel: Wait! Don’t forget...

Nimi: ???

Kaydel: 🎵 DON’T BE SUSPICIOUS, DON’T BE SUSPICIOUS 🎵

Nimi:  😅 They won’t notice a thing

Zorii: Five minutes later Nimi be like  🤥

Jannah:  😂 let’s hope not...

Kaydel: I feel like Poe’s gonna figure it out. Cause Poe’s Poe, and, well, he has this thing for always knowing when we’re doing something we shouldn’t be.

Zorii: Except for when we’re on a completely different planet without him even noticing.

Jannah: Oh I’m sure he’s noticed, he’s just glad for the break.


	123. Secret Weapon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank everyone who’s reading this. Don’t Give Star Wars Characters A Phone now has 300 kudos, and I’m so happy that so many people are enjoying this. So thank you to everyone for your comments and kudos 🖤

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Domination Alliance

Ben: Alright team. Let’s figure some things out. On our team, we have two force-sensitive fighters, one from the Resistance, and one from the First Order. A former slave from Canto Bight. And then there’s the secret weapon.

Arashell: Secret weapon? What’s the secret weapon?

Rey: You mean WHO’S the secret weapon. It’s you!

Arashell: me?

Ben: You’re the secret weapon.

Arashell: I’m confused.

Rey: Well aside from Oniho and Temiri, you’re the youngest soldier. Right?

Arashell: ya

Ben: So people are most likely going to look at you and think ‘it’s a little girl. She won’t be any competition.’ Which is obviously a lie, but that’s what they’ll think.

Rey: EXCEPT, you ARE competition. But because everyone’s gonna underestimate you, that gives you a HUGE advantage. Make sense?

Arashell: Yea!

Ben: Secret weapon.

Arashell:  🥰

Rey: I think our army’s gonna DOMINATE.

Arashell: well it kind of is our name

Rey: oh yea

Ben: True. Anyone have any other strategy ideas?

Rey: Run. Hide. Set up a base. Defeat everyone else.

Ben: Oh ok.

Rey: Stop judging my strategy.

Arashell: What strategy?

Rey: This is getting out of hand- now there are two of them!


	124. Chaos Army Causing Chaos

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the late chapter! The next chapter will be on time.

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Chaos Army

Kaydel: So...wow. The war is in a few days.

Kaydel: That’s cool.

Kaydel: And I’m bored so I started a chat room.

Zorii: Noice.

Jannah: Wanna do something dumb?

Zorii: Sure.

Jannah: We could bother Poe and Finn...sneak around base...hide in the Falcon...

  
Zorii: Nah. We’ve done all of those at least twice in the past week and a half.

Kaydel: We could...go visit Gwen...hang out in one of our rooms...steal the Falcon...

Jannah: GUYS

Zorii: what

Zorii: Please tell me it’s not just a spider again.

Jannah: LET’S PRANK GIRLSQUAD

Kaydel: oh wow we haven’t done that in at least a month

Kaydel: I’d say we’re overdue for some chaos.

Zorii: I mean...it is our name.

Jannah: We’d be disrespecting our reputations by NOT doing it.

Zorii: Meet in my room in 2 minutes.

Jannah: Why two?

Zorii: Because Kaydel’s already here

Kaydel: 💚  
  


Zorii: 💜

Jannah: oh ok im already outside anyway lol


	125. (Star Wars) Movie Night!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra chapter will be posted on the 20th (in my time zone, which I can never remember the name of, sorry) because...wow, it’s already been a whole year since TROS!

Gwen has started a chat room

Gwen invited Everyone

Gwen: GUYS LETS WATCH A MOVIE

Kaydel: Isn’t that more of a book club thing to do?I

Gwen: Yea but this movie has all of us in it!

Rey: Really? Who made a movie about us?

Gwen: I dunno some dude I guess. But it’s by Disney so it  _ has _ to be good!

Nimi: ooh a Disney movie

Arm: What’s it called?

Gwen: The Rise of Skywalker.

Rose: No. No way. No more Skywalker drama. I have had enough of that to last a lifetime! And I’m not even a Skywalker!

Gwen: Please Rose? Look, in it! And Zorii! And Kaydel! And Rey! And...well not me but Ben and Arm are. And Poe and Finn.

Kaydel: yay, a whole two hours of Stormpilot fluff watching Stormpilot fluff 🙄

Ben: Where do you guys wanna meet up?

Jannah: GUYS COME TO THE RESISTANCE BASE SO GWEN CAN STAY OVER

Poe: normally I would refuse to let this happen but I need a break from war. Both our war and the actual one, even though nobody’s really fighting anymore.

Poe: So come on over and we can meet up in…

Rose: My room.

Poe: Wait that doesn’t seem safe

Gwen: DISGUISE TIME

Ben: Gwen no

Gwen: Gwen yes

Arm: Can I bring the cat?

Nimi: YESSSS

Poe: Nimi seems to have forgotten that I’m in charge of the Resistance.

Jannah: You may be in charge of the Resistance, but you’re not in charge of us.

Mitaka: I pity anyone who tries to be in charge of them.

Arm: I’m bringing the cat either way, you do know that, right?

Gwen: I’m bringing the movie!

Ben: I can steal a ship.

Poe: Why do you need to steal a ship?

Ben: I mean it’s not stealing but it’s illegally leaving the FO so it’s close to stealing.

Poe: But...you four are basically in charge of the FO.

Gwen: Yes but stealing is FUN Poe

Arm: n-no its not

Gwen: Shut up Hugs.

Rey: Should we bring anything?

Rose: Blankets. Lots of blankets. And pillows. And yourselves. That last one’s kind of important.

Zorii: Kind of.

Nimi: I love how we all know where both the Resistance and First Order bases/ships are. And no one questions it.

Arm: We hardly even fight anymore anyway lol.

Rey: Ok Rose is this enough blankets?

Rose: huh how many- WHERE DID YOU EVEN FIND THAT MANY

Jannah: We used the ones from our beds and also there were a bunch we found in the Falcon.

Ben: Why do you keep blankets in the Falcon?

Arashell: Because Rey, Temi, Oni, and me all sleep in there.

Ben: Is that why you always have those weird lines on your cheek in the mornings?

Rey: ...yes. I keep falling asleep with my cheek on the floor. Which happens to be a grate.

Kaydel: xDDDDD I want to see that

Rey: no

Rose: Ok no fights let’s just get this pile of blankets inside.

Jannah: Okay!

Ben: We’re landing now.

Gwen: Should we just hide behind the Falcon?

Nimi: Sure

Poe: Ok guys I’m here and I brought Finn and popcorn

Rose: OOH POPCORN

Gwen: YASSS POPCORNNNNN

Arm: Yay, popcorn again!

Poe: Really? No one’s excited that Finn’s here?

Jannah: Oh, Finn’s here?

Finn: y-yes

Zorii: I just stopped listening after I heard popcorn.

Rey: Wait do you guys know the way to Rose’s room?

Ben: No

Mitaka: Nope

Gwen: I feel like I should remember but I get lost very easily.

Arm: ...i know how to get to Rose’s room

Kaydel: *snickers*

Temiri: What?

Nimi: NOBODY SAY ANYTHING

Arashell: is this like the drastic measure thing

Nimi: YES IT IS

Arashell: but nobody’s fighting

Nimi: IT’S JUST SOMETHING YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW YET

Oniho: *is scared*

Temiri: *is scareder*

Arashell: *is disappointed in friend’s grammar skills*

Zorii: *sniffles* girl after my own heart

Jannah: Zorii you have terrible grammar

Zorii: No I don’t! Kaydel’s the one who said ‘Les do trains’!

Kaydel: That was an autocorrect accident!

Zorii: Oh sure, blame autocorrect!

Mitaka: And here we go with another couple fighting…

Rey: Don’t worry, they make up pretty quickly. By the time we start this movie they’ll be best friends again.

Mitaka: If only we could be so lucky when it comes to Rose and Arm…


	126. The Rise Of Skywalker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...wow. I still can’t believe it’s been a whole entire year since The Rise of Skywalker completed the Skywalker saga. So...I’m going to say an enormous thank you to all the people who helped to make this movie and all of its characters and planets and creatures, even if they won’t read this. Thank you to the people who keep AO3 running, and provide a space to share fanworks. A giant thank you to everyone who’s left kudos and comments, I truly hope you’re enjoying this story. And just...enjoy. May the Force be with you.  
> Also, I apologize ahead of time for some light C3-PO bashing, to any Threepio fans.

Gwen: IS EVERYBODY READY?

Temiri: ya

Rose: Yea :)

Mitaka: Yep

Kaydel: I will be as soon as whoever’s laying on my arm gets off of me,

Arm: oh sorry

Rey: Someone’s using my feet as a pillow now but it’s actually quite comfortable so I’m not complaining.

Arashell: Oops it’s me

Rey: Wait don’t move now my feet are cold 😭

Arashell: Can I share the blanket with you and Ben?

Ben: Sure, just don’t steal all of it :)

Gwen: Wait who stole the remote?!?!

Zorii: For once it wasn’t me.

Mitaka: Gwen it is literally right next to you.

Gwen: Oh! I knew that!

Poe: Gwen Phasma, please give someone else the remote so we can start this movie.

Rose: Lol we haven’t even started and Poe’s addicted.

Poe: What? I mean, like Gwen said, it’s a whole movie about us! You and Arm are gonna be in it!

Rose: Oh that’s gonna be so weird. Seeing people portray us, I mean.

Poe: Oh you’re right. That’s a little weird.

Poe: While we’re waiting for Gwen to decipher the remote, what’s this movie about anyway?

Rose: It says on the box that it’s about that time with the Final Order.

Zorii: oh

Arm: oh

Jannah: is this really a good idea

Mitaka: Guys don’t worry.

Mitaka: Because if this movie’s about all of us, then Millicent will be in it.

Kaydel: Mitaka being the only smart person in this room.

Gwen: Ok, it’s starting! Everyone shut up!

Ben: We weren’t even talking anyway, just texting.

Gwen: Shut up or I’m throwing the remote at you.

Zorii: guys i do have one short request

Poe: ?

Zorii: can we skip the part where Kijimi blows up

Gwen: Yea we can definitely skip it

Zorii: 👍

Arm: WAIT A MINUTE, EMPEROR PALPATINE?!?!?

Rose: Wait u didnt know he came back

Arm: NO I WAS NOT AWARE OF THIS

Gwen: More likely he wasn’t listening

Rose: 😂 probably true

Arashell: Wait, you used to be ENEMIES?

Rey: ...yea

Ben: Sort of, yes.

Arashell: That’s so weird

Ben: It really is, looking back on it. A lot can happen in a year, I guess.

Poe: Omigod this was before Finn and I started dating

Poe: And got married

Poe: Wow whoever is portraying us is doing so very accurately.

Finn: He still complains when he loses at dejarik so unfortunately some things do not change after a year.

Rose: Oh, hey, it’s the spy!

Arm: wut where am i

Rose: No the other one 😂

Rose: I wonder what happened to him…

Ben: uhh…

Arm: So…

Gwen: About that…

Oniho: Poe, where did you learn to fly like that?

Zorii: The secret ingredient is crime.

Nimi: ZORII NO

Zorii: Fine. (Oniho, I’ll show you how to do it later, if you want)

Oniho: Ya! :D

Jannah; you realize we can all see that right?

Gwen: Can someone pass the cat?

Nimi: NO

Poe: You know BB-8 still hasn’t forgiven you for dropping that tree on him, right?

Rey: we’re not gonna talk about that, Dameron

Ben: POE WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE FALCON

Poe: i mean at least it still works

Ben: IT’S ON FIRE

Poe: this is a dramatic retelling-

Finn: No, it was on fire. That’s not just added for drama.

Rose: where am i

Rose: gwen you said i was in this movie

Jannah: Me too but technically at this point I hadn’t even met you yet.

Zorii: 😂”somehow” Palpatine has returned, that’s just hilarious

Arm: Oh look, there you are Rose.

Kaydel: 😭 WHERE IS I

Zorii: I too has great grammar Kaydel

Kaydel: SHUT UP

Rose: oh

Rose: so that’s what happened to the other spy

Rose: I can’t unsee that.

Arm: Ok but that was actually for dramatic purposes, we did not put the head on the table. We eat on the table. You do not put a bloody decapitated head on the table you use for eating.

Temiri: Why are you eating on the table in a meeting room?

Arm: Because sometimes meetings run a little long ok? Even generals need to eat.

Termini: …

Finn: Ok but really, the festival only happens once every FORTY-TWO YEARS.

Rey: We do have pretty terrible luck.

Poe: Why did we even need to bring Threepio with us anyway?

Finn: I truly have no clue 😂 probably so he’d stop bothering everyone in the Resistance with random facts, not to be rude.

Arashell: ooh another force bond

Arashell: It’s so weird how they do it in the movie.

Rose: Coincidence that Ben and Rey are connected immediately after she says she has no family name? I think not!

Rey: Coincidence that Rose has only had like 30 seconds of onscreen time so far because no one wants to watch her and Arm make out for two hours? I think not.

Rose: I-

Rose: we actually got stuff done as well tho

Kaydel: LIKE WHAT?

Arm: I mean we exchanged valuable intel.

Jannah: sure… 😏

Rose: OH LOOK IT’S ME I’M FINALLY IN THIS MOVIE

Kaydel: OH LOOK A SNEK

Zorii: SNEK

Kaydel: NO STEP ON SNEK

Zorii: NOPE ROPES

Poe: Does anyone understand what they’re saying?

Gwen: It’s probably a meme.

Kaydel: SHE HEAL THE SNEK

Zorii: ITSA JUDGEMENTAL SHOELACE

Gwen: Please stop

Temiri: what’s a snek?

Zorii: A SNEK IS A LOOONG ROPE THAT EATS SMOL FLOOFS

Temiri: a snake?

Kaydel: SNEK

Poe: Hey which reminds me, what did you never tell Rey?

Finn: Are we still doing this?

Poe: yes, yes we are

Finn: I was gonna tell her I was force-sensitive. Happy?

Poe: yes

Arashell: wait but Chewie’s still alive?

Rey: Yea, we just didn’t know it.

Zorii: YAY IT’S ME

Zorii: Whoever this lady is, I would like to congratulate her for accurately protraying how much I hated Poe last year.

Rose: Wow why can’t Threepio be this helpful daily

Finn: It was a once in a lifetime occurrence

Rose: And I missed it 😭

Kaydel: ex-EXCUSE ME

Kaydel: ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH MY GIRLFRIEND

Poe: this was a whole year ago

Rey: Ok first of all we did not fight with lightsabers on Kijimi

Ben: It was more of a friendly chat

Rey: I mean we did eventually start fighting but like

Ben: This is an inaccurate representation of what happened

Gwen: Well it’s all dramatized.

Temiri: WAIT YOU’RE A PALPATINE

Rey: oh yea did we forget to tell u that

Temiri: YES YOU DID

Arashell: Seriously Tem? It’s not like it changes anything.

Oniho: I mean it kind of does…

Arashell: 😡

Oniho: but just a little not really i mean its not even that much-

Arm: WAIT THIS MOVIE IS VERY INCORRECT

Arm: PRYDE SHOT ME BUT I LIVED OK

Rose: We know, Arm.

Nimi: How DID you survive that?

Arm: It’s a really long story

Jannah: HEY LOOK IT’S ME

Jannah: AND FERRULE OMIGOD I MISS HIM SO MUCH

Arm: Who?

Jannah: FERRULE WAS MY ORBAK 😭💛

Gwen: OMIGOD IT’S MOANA

Gwen: REY IS MOANA

Nimi: GWEN SHUT UP WE’RE TRYING TO WATCH A MOVIE

Finn: Yea this part sucks, I almost drowned.

Jannah: Same. His fault!

Arashell: Is she fighting...herself?

Rey: yes it was weird

Oniho: Who’s that guy?

Zorii: i don’t recall ever meeting him

Poe: That’s Han Solo. Or at least his force ghost. Memory. I’m actually a little confused there so… *shrugs*

Oniho: Wait like the pilot?

Temiri: No, the smuggler!

Arashell: He used to own the Falcon, right?

Poe: Yes, yes, and yes.

Oniho: I thought he was still alive!

Ben: About that… it’s another long story.

Oniho: But I like long stories!

Rose: Um...How about we wait until after this story’s over first?

Oniho: fine…

Zorii: Gwen this is the part we need to skip.

Gwen: On it 👍

Ben: How does that old x-wing still work???

Rey: I truly don’t know but it does and it’s outside, we can show u guys after the movie.

Arm: And it flies?

Nimi: I fly it about once a week just to make sure it’s still in good condition.

Rose: uhoh

Jannah: And here’s where things got slightly out of control…

Temiri: ?

Jannah: you’ll see…

Arashell: oh

Oniho: oh force

Rose: Why did we think watching this was a good idea?

Kaydel: oh look I’m finally in the mov- oh look i got shot. This was a terrible idea.

Poe: I mean it gets better.

Kaydel: Yes but that does not mean it’s not painful to watch.

Rose: Let’s just focus on the fact that Jannah somehow managed to get a herd of orbaks into a troop transport and then rode them across a star destroyer, because that was pretty cool.

Jannah: Aw thanks Rose 💛

Rey: Ok but this part actually felt pretty good.

Arashell: what di- DID YOU JUST TELEPORT A LIGHTSABER

Ben: Yes. It was actually pretty cool, looking back on it.

Nimi: GUYS LOOK I THINK THAT WAS ME

Nimi: oh wait no bc they died and I’m still alive

Nimi: 😭 I thought I was gonna die guys

Poe: Same :(

Rose: yea it was pretty chaotic on the ground too.

Finn: Lando to the rescue!

Jannah: Just in time :)

Zorii: AYYY I’M BACK SUCKERS

Kaydel: oop u just got YEETED

Ben: yea that was kind of painful

Poe: wait what are those voices?

Rey: No clue actually. It was a bit creepy. I just heard Luke. And I think Rose?

Rose: Wait why me

Rey: I DON’T KNOW I wasn’t really paying attention to who was saying what

Gwen: Did you literally...just quote Iron Man but slightly adjusted to fit the circumstances?

Rey: Iron Man?

Gwen: I’ll educate u later

Kaydel: YAY JANNAH

Jannah: Kaydel this is the part where I almost die

Kaydel: oh sorry

Kaydel: DON’T LET GO JANNAH

Jannah: Don't worry I didn’t

Finn: Really? No one cares if I fall off?

Poe: I mean I do-

Kaydel: Sorry but my sister comes first

Mitaka: Wait so are they sisters, or is Kaydel Jannah’s mom?

Zorii: It varies from moment to moment.

Arashell: w-wait

Arashell: That’s just dramatic exaggeration stuff right?

Rey: ...no. That really happened.

Arashell: You died?

Temiri: Why did half of the people here die, but they’re still here right now?

Rose: I mean I lived this whole time so-

Kaydel: Same lol but my shoulder still hurts at times which sucks tho it’s better than being dead

Arm: Wait, YOU died too? 

Gwen: LET’S START A DEAD PERSON CLUB

Ben: Actually that’s just for drama purposes I didn’t die.

Gwen: I DON’T CARE I’M STILL STARTING A DEAD PERSON CLUB WHO WANTS TO JOIN

Arm: Me!

Poe: Can I join? I’m sure Zorii’s visualized my death countless times already.

Zorii: Kriff how did u know

Zorii: I stopped about a year ago I swear

Finn: EXCUSE ME POE DID YOU JUST FLIRT WITH ZORII

Poe: ...it was a long time ago

Rose: And she said NOPE

Zorii: I had better things to do right then 😂

Jannah: I just want to say that Lando never did help me find out where I was from so that backfired-

Jannah: But I also found a new family so I guess it worked out in the end 😁🥰

Rose: That’s one thing the movie definitely got right. The fact that we’re all one big crazy dysfunctional and occasionally violent family.

Finn: Yeah.

Gwen: Definitely.

Temiri: Ya.

Poe: Wait when did you go to Tatooine?

Rey: I didn’t, that’s just for drama I guess.

Kaydel: Huh. Interesting movie.

Arm: Fairly incorrect, but also fairly correct. And prettty good.

Gwen: I told you it would be good! It’s a Disney movie!

Nimi: Wait you’re telling me we only watched this because Gwen is a Disney fangirl?

Arm: Well that and because we wanted to have another movie night before the war.

Rose: And because I wanted to see Millicent again.


	127. Chaos Army’s Attack

Nimi has started a chat room

Nimi invited Girlsquad

Nimi: OK WHO DID THIS

Nimi: WHY ARE ALL MY HISTORY BOOKS STUCK TO THE CEILING?

Rose: Guys I’m dead

Rose: Like, actually dead.

Rose: Someone dyed Millicent’s fur green.

Rose: It won’t wash out. Hux is going to murder me.

Rey: I…

Rey: I just want to say that someone basically turned the Falcon into a spiderweb, and that we’re trying to escape but there’s string EVERYWHERE and we’re stuck.

Arashell: Send help please.

Gwen: I mean nothing happened to me but I’m over at the FO.

Gwen: But I would come rescue you if I could, so hopefully that counts for something.

Arashell: Thank you.

Rose: Ok Poe just asked me to add him to this for some reason-

Rose added Poe

Poe: WHOEVER PAINTED MY NAILS WHILE I WAS ASLEEP IS DEAD

Rey: Not me, I’m stuck in the Falcon right now.

Rose: I’m trying to wash the green dye out of Millicent’s fur.

Nimi: I’m trying to get my books off the ceiling, and I truly don’t know how they got up there.

Arashell: I think it was Zorii, Kaydel, and Jannah

Gwen: They haven’t been pranked yet…and they ARE the Chaos Army…

Kaydel: heheh of course it’s not us-

Zorii: QUICK HIDE IN MY ROOM

Jannah: WE GONNA DIE

Poe: Ladies?

Rose: Yes?

Poe: Grab the weapons.

Nimi: SIEGE

Arashell: What?

Nimi: WE TRAP THEM IN THEIR ROOMS UNTIL THEY SURRENDER

Arashell: Yes.

Rey: GUYS WE’RE STILL STUCK IN HERE

Poe: USE YOUR LIGHTSABER, IDIOT

Rey: IT’S IN ROSE’S ROOM

Poe: WHY?

Rose: I would like to know why as well, actually-

Rey: BECAUSE OF THE MOVIE LAST NIGHT

Rose: why did you bring a lightsaber to movie night-

Nimi: FIND A BLASTER OR SOMETHING

Gwen: Just run into them. They’re just strings, right?

Rey: yes

Gwen: I’m guessing Zorii and Jannnah and Kaydel just duct-taped them or something?

Arashell: yes

Gwen: Cover your face and run through them.

Rey: I- ok?

Arashell: She just tripped over one 😂

Arashell: It’s sort of working. We’re almost out.

Rose: I brought the lightsaber! And the cat!

Kaydel: WE HAVE A PORG, SO WE WIN

Rose: MY BOYFRIEND’S CAT IS SUPERIOR

Nimi: Here we go again…

Rey: Hey nice nails Poe.

Poe: shut up Solo

Gwen: DID THEY ACTUALLY PAINT POE’S NAILS?!

Rey: Neon. Pink.

Gwen: YES

Poe: NO

Zorii: I will admit, it felt good.

Kaydel: I taught her how! :)

Rose: Alright, checklist time. Weapons?

Arashell: I found a stick, does that work?

Poe: yes

Rose: Phones?

Rey: Check.

Rose: Moral support from halfway across the galaxy?

Gwen: Check! 😊

Rose: Alright. Les do trains.

Kaydel: THAT WAS STOLEN

Poe: WE’RE COMING FOR YOUUUUUU

Jannah: LOCK THE DOOR, QUICK

Nimi: BREAK DOWN THE DOOR

Rose: HOW

Arashell: JUST KICK IT

Rey: guys let’s just knock

Nimi: oh ok

Rey: YOU THREE BETTER OPEN UP OR I’M LIGHTSABERING THE DOOR

Poe: Lightsabering?

Rey: Shut up Dameron.

Jannah: FINE WE SURRENDER

Zorii: But only because we can’t miss the war.

Jannah: Also I was hungry.


	128. Game Before the War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas, to those of you who celebrate! 🎄 To those of you who don’t, let’s just celebrate the fact that we’re another day closer to leaving behind the train wreck that is 2020 🥲

Arm has started a chatroom

Arm invited WARRIORS (plus the video and rule and design peeps)

Gwen: Niiiiiiiice

Gwen: Very creative name.

Arm: Oh shut up.

Nimi: Break it up you two. So...the war starts tomorrow.

Maddy: That just sounds weird cause we’re already at war xD

Rey: What even is the purpose of this chat?

Arm: ...great question

Kaydel: Nimi, you’re still gonna do us that favor we asked about, right?

Nimi: Of course.

Rose: Uh oh. WHAT FAVOR???

Zorii: Chill, she’s watching Jessika for a few days.

Nimi: I shall take care of your child.

Temiri: Umm...what are we doing here?

Arm: Like I said: great question.

Jannah: LET THE CHAOS COMMENCE!!!

Poe: Oh no.

Poe: EVERYBODY PANIC NOW!!!!

Ben: NO shipping. That got dangerous.

Zorii: KISS MARRY KILL!!!!!!!

Rose: N O

Gwen: How about... okay, how about we play Kaydel’s Who’s Most Likely To? game, but with our own questions!

Arm: sounds chaotic. i’m in.

Nimi: Ooh! I’ll start!

Nimi: Mitaka. Who is most likely to...steal Arm’s cat?

Mitaka: Oh, that’s a hard one. Well...Gwen might steal Millie to annoy Arm. But then Kaydel and Zorii would probably steal Millie cause they’re Kaydel and Zorii. I’ll go with...Gwen.

Mitaka: Alright, Poe. Who’s most likely to accidentally blow something up?

Poe: I’d say Kaydel and Zorii, but they’d do it on purpose.

Zorii: He’s right.

Kaydel: We never blow anything up that we don’t want to blow up.

Poe: So maybe...Jannah?

Jannah: You know what, I agree with you  🤣

Poe: Temiri. Who is most likely to...jump scare someone?

Temiri: Oniho.

Arashell: EXPOSED

Temiri: Um...Maddy. Who’s most likely to impale themselves with a lightsaber?

Maddy: On purpose, or accidentally?

Temiri: Accidentally.

Maddy: Jessika the porg.

Maddy: If I remember correctly, she was chewing on it at a Girlsquad meeting once.

Ben: And the irresponsible parent award goes to...Kaydel and Zorii.

Rey: Second place goes to Arm and Rose for letting Kaydel crash two ships in the same week. Especially since one of them was slower than a space slug.

Maddy: Arashell. Who’s most likely to...umm...hack into a chat room?

Arashell: Every girl on this chat.

Arashell: But if I have to pick one...Rose.

Arashell: Ben. Who’s most likely to... get lost?

Ben: Gwen. That one’s easy.

Gwen: xD true I was trying to get to the mess hall this morning and I ended up in a supply closet. These Star Destroyers are too big!!! (Also I think we already did this question but whatever)

Ben: Alright, um...Rose. Who’s most likely to be late?

Rose: Kaydel. She’s gotta brush her hair first.

Rose: Mitaka. Who’s most likely to cheat at a game?

Mitaka: Well apparently Arm found this hack for his Candy Crush game...

Poe: YoU cAn HaCk CaNdY cRuSh!?!?!

Poe: Teach me

Mitaka: THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HAND!!! NOW THERE ARE TWO OF THEM!!!!!

Mitaka: Gwen, who’s most likely to...black out and deny it?

Gwen: Rey I’m calling you out

Rey: Oh force *runs*

Gwen: Jannah, who’s most likely to get stuck in a revolving door?

Jannah: Revolving? Door?

Gwen: Well, that pretty much answers the question...

Jannah: Nimi. Who’s most likely to...be a terrible parent? (Aside from Zorii and Kaydel)

Zorii: Jannah we’re disowning you

Nimi: Imma call out the two force-sensitives xD

Ben: *starts to deny it*

Ben: *realizes she’s probably right*  


Jannah: Ok guys as fun as this is, it’s like midnight where we are. Imma go get some sleep so I’m not exhausted for the war tomorrow, plz don’t ask me any questions cause I won’t be checking my phone.

Poe: Jannah being the only responsible person in our group.

Rey: It’s about time someone actually tried for once xD

Finn: Just want to say, I’m not in this ‘our group’ thing. Poe can be all buddy-buddy with you FO guys, but I’m not.

Maddy: EXCUSE ME? FO GUYS AND GALS AS WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Arm: Maddy, you missed the entire point

Nimi: But really, who cares? Also, I’m gonna go to sleep too.

Oniho: Ya same

Rose: Okay, we can continue this game later. Let’s all get some sleep, cause tomorrow’s the war and well...we’ll need our energy.


	129. Transport

Kaydel has started a chatroom

Kaydel invited WARRIORS

Kaydel: Hey everyone

Zorii: Hi  😘

Mitaka: So. Was anyone else really surprised when Arm and Poe loaded everyone into this troop transport?

Rey: Very.

Ben: They’re taking this a little too seriously. We’ve been flying for about...two hours.

Temiri: TWO HOURS?!?!?!

Mitaka: Yep, that’s Arm...

Rey: Has anyone actually tried to figure out where we’re going?

Jannah: Not really.

Ben: WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

Rey: Just a sec...

Kaydel: I really don’t think kicking a metal wall is gonna-

Rey: owww

Kaydel: -do anything.

Poe: STOP HITTING THE WALL

Zorii: He knows how to hack into chat rooms?

Poe: Nimi did it for me. So I could tell you guys to stop hitting the wall.

Arashell: We’re not hitting it, we’re kicking it.

Rey: Not advisable.

Poe: *sighs* look, we’re almost there. Calm down back there.

Poe has left the chat

Oniho: I think we’re landing!

Temiri: You sure?

Oniho: U can tell because of the different sound, along with-

Temiri: Okay, okay, just wanted to make sure you were sure.

  
Mitaka: So before we all start killing each other...good luck everyone.

Jannah: Good luck

Arashell: May the Force be with you

Zorii: May the odds be ever in your favor

Kaydel: May we stop with all the random ‘good luck’ variations now?


	130. Transport pt.2

Poe has started a chatroom

Poe invited Videoegraphers, Rule-enforcers, and Designers

Poe: I’m slightly frightened. I haven’t heard anything from everyone back there.

Arm: Just be thankful for the peace.

Nimi: Can you pass Millicent?

Arm: *sighs* Fine. Just make sure she doesn’t eat Jessika.

Gwen: I can take Jessika for now.

Nimi: Ok

Maddy: Why are we just passing everyone’s pets back and forth?

Arm: It’s soothing.

Nimi: Poe can I get a cat?

Poe: Sure.

Nimi: OMIGOD THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

Poe: Np I just want a cat at the Resistance as well.

Poe: Can someone else pilot for a while?

Rose: I can take over-

Rose: OKAY WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?????

Finn: I told you choosing a far away planet was a terrible idea.

Poe: Nimi can you hack into a chat for me?

Nimi: Sure, which one?

Poe: Whichever one all the soldiers are in.

Nimi: Yea...okay, that should work.

Gwen: Why are we texting instead of talking?

Rose: Arm’s idea, remember?

Gwen: No, I’ve honestly started tuning him out.

Rose: Well he thinks that if we talk, they’ll be able to hear where we’re going.

Maddy: Umm...guys, can’t they just hack into our chatroom?

Arm: Nah, Rose put up code walls. It’s pretty much impossible to hack into this.

Poe: Okay, they shouldn’t hit (or kick) the wall any more.

Nimi: Guys, we gotta land!

Rose: Uhh Poe you do this part.

Poe: On it.


	131. The War Begins!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As the ‘war’ begins, 2020 comes to an end. It’s definitely been an...interesting...year. Let’s hope 2021 brings less chaos and positive tests, and more vaccines and good news. Wishing everyone reading this a prosperous new year, and may the force be with you, always.   
> -ReyAndor19 🖤🦋

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited CHAOS ARMY

Jannah: Woah.

Zorii: Woah.

Kaydel: Um.

Jannah: I don’t know what I was expecting.

Jannah: But I do know it wasn’t this.

Zorii: How...did Arm and Poe...and I think Rose was part of their group too...manage to do this?

Kaydel: Wasn’t Finn as well?

Zorii: Yea but he STILL isn’t as okay with the whole FO peeps being friends with Resistance peeps thing yet. (Can’t really blame him I guess). Apparently he just complained a lot.

Kaydel: Ahh. Well this is crazy either way. Alright, let’s make a really quick plan.

Jannah: Let’s find cover.

Zorii: and set up a base ASAP

Kaydel: Uhhh when does this whole thing start?

Jannah: Umm...right now I think

Zorii: Oh. Okay, well Jannah and I can grab supplies and Kaydel, you find a spot for us to set up a base.

Jannah: Great. Let’s go!

Kaydel: umm...what would be a good spot for a base...?

Zorii: Are u talking to yourself virtually?

Kaydel: yes

Zorii: That’s adorable

Jannah: Wow there’s a lot of building supplies.

Jannah: Makes you wonder if Arm destroyed any buildings to get it all...

Zorii: I mean, he does get really invested in this kind of stuff.

Kaydel: Okay guys, over here!!!!

Zorii: We see you

Jannah: Looks like everyone is just setting up their base right now

Kaydel: I wonder if Nimi’s actually broadcasting this to the galaxy...

Nimi: I am.

Zorii: WHAT THE FORCE NIMI

Nimi: I’m just really bored. There’s not much to do up here. But hiding the fact that I’m showing this to the whole galaxy does make it a lot more fun

Jannah: Are you hacking into everyone’s chats?

Nimi: Nah, just yours. Anyway, gtg. Y’all have fun.

Nimi left the chat

Kaydel: So...anyway...les build stuff.

Zorii: Like what?

Kaydel: A box. With a place to spy and shoot people.

Jannah: And probably a place to sleep, because I think this will last a few days.

Kaydel: Yea, that too...les do trains I guess.


	132. Base Building

Ben has started a chat room

Ben invited DOMINATION ARMY

Rey: Is anyone else scared?

Arashell: Of the building supplies? Yes.

Ben: WHAT DID HUX DO

Rey: I believe he destroyed an entire city...

Rey: Alright, let’s get building.

Rose: Hey guys how’s life?

Ben: I’m not even surprised that you’ve already hacked us.

Rose: Lol I’m so bored.

Rose: Plus I hate being in the same room as Arm right now.

Rey: Aww come on Rose! Just give him a chance! I really don’t even know what you two are fighting about anymore.

Arashell: Ya it’s getting annoying

Rose:  🙄 don’t you guys have something more important to be doing?

Ben: We’re texting you and building our base at the same time. It’s already halfway built.

Rose: Yea I can see. I’m watching you guys.

Rey:  😳

Rose: Nice base tho. That was fast.

Arashell: But it only has three walls?

Rose: Oh I didn’t see that

Rey: Guys does this work for the fourth wall?

Ben: Yes.

Ben: Where did you even find that?

Rey: I might’ve stolen it from Kaydel and Zorii and Jannah.

Arashell: Might’ve.

Ben: Well it works and we’re at war.

Arashell: How are we going to get in?

Rey: Are we seriously locked out of our own base?

Ben: Who forgot to make the door?

Rey: haha I wouldn’t know who forgot to make a door to our base definitely wasn’t me-

Ben: Wait we have lightsabers nevermind.

Arashell: So do we just stay here?

Ben: I guess. Why is there a huge pile of stuff in the corner?

Rey: I grabbed some stuff so we could expand the base if we want.

Rey: I also brought Pride and Prejudice, and the third Harry Potter book.

Arashell: Ooh I’ll trade you Harry Potter for Catching Fire!

Ben: Why did you guys sneak books into the battlefield?

Rey: Ok but what did you bring?

Ben: ...Insurgent and Mockingjay.


	133. A New Alliance

Oniho has started a chat room

Oniho invited Temiri

Temiri: Where should we build our base?

Oniho: LET’S BUILD A TREEHOUSE

Oniho: WE CAN HAVE THE HIGH GROUND

Temiri: YES

Temiri: Wow we got a lot of supplies.

Temiri: How are we gonna get these up into the tree?

Oniho: I’ll climb the tree, you hand stuff up to me.

Temiri: I can try  😅

Oniho: Ok I think that’s good.

  
Temiri: What if we build a lookout point sort of thing?

Oniho: Ya, and a ladder we can roll up when we’re not using it!

Temiri: I’ll start putting together the left side, can you build the entrance?

Oniho: Ya.

Oniho: Hey Tem, Mitaka’s out here.

Oniho: I might’ve left my blaster over by you.

Temiri:  🙄 Well does Mitaka have a weapon?

Oniho: No he just wants to chat.

Temiri: Mk

Temiri invited Mitaka

Mitaka: Hey guys.

Oniho: Hey?

Temiri: Hi.

Mitaka: So...Chaos Army has three people, and Domination Army has three people, and you guys only have two people, and I’m just one person...so I was wondering if I could work with you guys?

Temiri: You want to join our army?

Mitaka: Yea basically.

Temiri: I dunno...it might be a trick. Oni?

Oniho: It might be...

Mitaka: It would benefit all of us. We’d all have a better chance of winning the war.

Oniho: He’s not wrong. I’m fine with it.

Temiri: You’re sure?

Temiri: It kinda seems like a trap.

Mitaka: Even if it was, you’d outnumber me two to one.

Temiri: Technically you’re older than both of us 

Temiri: And you have better training.

Oniho: I dunno Tem, I think we can trust him.

Temiri: Well we can’t vote because we’d tie.

Oniho: How about you can stay with us for the first day and after that we vote?

Mitaka: I like that idea.

Temiri: Sure.

Oniho: Then you’re part of our army.


	134. Control Center

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Videoegraphers, Rule-enforcers, and Designers

Poe: And...the war has begun!

Gwen: This is gonna be kind of boring, just watching everyone build their bases.

Nimi: Meh. Maybe I’ll hack their chats or something.

Rose: Lol same.

Poe: Hey Hugs, pass the cat.

Arm: no i want to hug her

Poe: Please?  🥺

Arm: ...fine

Finn: Not Poe using puppy dog eyes.

Poe: Finn can we get a cat?

Finn: We have a droid.

Poe: yes but can we get a cat

Finn: no

Poe: Why?  😭

Finn: Because we have a BB-8.

Poe: Oh ok.

Rose: Is anyone else confused?

Arm: BB-8 is their child. Millicent is mine.

Gwen: Jessika is Kaydel and Zorii’s.

Nimi: No, Jannah is.

Maddy: Isn’t she also occasionally their sister?

Arm: It varies from moment to moment.

Gwen: I love how Poe started this to be professional, but now we’re just chatting.

Rose: Oh look Mitaka joined up with Oniho and Temiri

Poe: I’ll look later, I’m busy with Millicent.

Nimi: I’m busy with other stuff.

Rose: You don’t seem busy.

Nimi: I’m trying to take care of the porg.

Gwen: The porg’s building a nest in my helmet.

Nimi: oh force I’m sorry

Gwen: It’s fine, she cute.

Rose: Did the Domination Army just...start reading?

Gwen: Looks that way.

Nimi: Chaos Army better attack right now.

Rose: CHAOS ARMY WILL NEVER WIN

Nimi: THEY ARE FAR SUPERIOR

Poe: Am I missing something?

Finn: w-why are they screaming at each other?

Gwen: Because Rose is betting that Domination Army will win, and Nimi is betting that Chaos Army will win.

Finn: You’re BETTING?

Rose: Yea

Nimi: Mhmm.

Arm: What’s at stake?

Nimi: 20 credits.

Rose: And the Frozen soundtrack.

Arm: I-

Arm: I’m not really sure how to respond to that.

Gwen: Don’t.


	135. First Day’s End

Ben has started a chatroom

Ben invited Domination Army

Ben: Wow, the first day’s already over.

Ben: That went really fast.

Rey: Guys where are you, I can’t see a thing.

Arashell: I’m over here.

Rey: Where is ‘here’?

Arashell: uhhh...good question.

Ben: Are you using a lightsaber as a light source?

Rey: Do you have any other ideas?

Ben: Fair point.

Rey: Ok this works for a temporary sleeping arrangement.

Ben: Tomorrow we should probably figure something out other than sleeping on a pile of rocks.

Arashell: Only probably.

Rey: Goodnight guys.

Arashell: Night.

Ben: Goodnight.

Rey removed Arashell

Rey: She likes me more than she likes you  🥰😋

Ben: Just because she decided to curl up against you and fall asleep doesn’t mean she likes you more  😒😢

Rey: yes it does  ☺️

Rey: Should we be worried about someone attacking in the middle of the night?

Ben: Probably not, the Chaos Army seems to be asleep as well. I haven’t seen Oniho or Temiri or Mitaka though.

Rey: Same, they all disappeared. I think they headed for the forest.

Ben: Probably. There’s really nowhere else to hide here.

Rey: Mk. See you tomorrow, then  😘

Ben: See you tomorrow  ❤️


	136. First Day’s End: Chaos Army

Kaydel has started a chat room

Kaydel invited Chaos Army

Kaydel: Wow, the first day’s already over.

Zorii: Our base is pretty much done, so tomorrow we can probably work on some fighting strategies.

Jannah: Zoriiiiiii it’s too late at night to talk about strategies

Jannah: Though we could probably storm any of the bases right now and catch them off guard.

Kaydel: Noooooo I’m too tireddddddd

Kaydel: I got no sleep last night.

Jannah: Why?

Kaydel: I dunno

Zorii: I didn’t sleep cause Kaydel kept me up all night.

Jannah: *spits water*

Zorii: Shut up you’re not even drinking water.

Jannah: *grabs water bottle* YOU WANNA GO?

Zorii: no i wanna sleeeeeeeeeep

Kaydel: Domination Army’s sleeping.

Jannah: Yes but they have a child.

Kaydel: Has anyone seen Temiri, Oniho, or Mitaka?

Zorii: Yea they’re over by the woods.

Kaydel: Where?

Zorii: Over there *gestures vaguely*

Jannah: So you have no clue where they are.

Zorii: We can find out tomorrow. They’re probably sleeping as well.

Kaydel: so is this argument settled cause i want to sleep

Jannah: It is for now, though we should probably find out where the rest of our enemies are.

  
Kaydel: I agree with that, just not right now cause I can’t focus.

Kaydel: Also I can’t see any of you, who has the flashlight?

Zorii: I got it.

Jannah: But guys where are we sleeping

Jannah: Can I sleep on that random piece of wood we dragged in here but can’t think of a use for?

Kaydel: Knock yourself out.

Kaydel: But not literally.

Jannah: Aww that’s no fun

Jannah: Jkjk

Zorii: Welp. Night everyone.

Zorii: Peace out

Zorii has left the chat

Kaydel: Night Jannah.

Jannah: Night Kaydel.

Kaydel has left the chat

Jannah has left the chat


	137. Droids!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just had to do a droid chapter, I wanted to write one from the POV of someone *watching* the war, but couldn’t think of enough characters to do so, and decided it would be more fun to write the droids’ reactions to the show.
> 
> THERE IS SOME LIGHT THREEPIO BASHING, I APOLOGIZE TO C3-PO FANS.  
> He just annoys me for some reason. I’m sorry.

C3-PO has started a chat room

C3-PO invited Rebel Droids

C3-PO: Have you seen the new holovid that’s been going around lately?

BB-8: <The one about the war?>

C3-PO: Yes! That load of rubbish. Who would ever believe that Poe Dameron and General Hux would work together to create a game? And that there would ever be inter-army partnership?

C3-PO: Though I must congratulate the director on their imagination and ability to find lookalikes. Do you know if General Dameron has seen this yet? I’ve been looking for him, but he seems to have disappeared.

R2-D2: <Do you want to tell him or should I?>

BB-8: <Hmm...>

D-0: I hav-have not seen this game.

BB-8 invited BB-9E

BB-8: <Have you been watching the war?>

BB-9E: <Of course.>

D-0: Hel-hello! I am D-0!

BB-9E: <I am BB-9E, astromech.>

BB-8: <Who’s your team for the war?>

BB-9E: <Mitaka will obviously win.>

R2-D2: <No way! Domination Army!>

BB-8:<*cries in Chaos Army*>

D-0: Can I watch this ga-game?

R2-D2: <Meet up outside Poe’s x-wing, we’re rewatching the first episode.>

BB-8: <They’re directed by Nimi Chireen!>

BB-9E: <The lady from Booksmart night?>

BB-8: <Yea>

C3-PO: Wait, wait, wait. All of you slow down! Who’s BB-9E?

BB-9E: <BB-9E, First Order astromech.>

C3-PO: BB-8, how do you know a FO astromech???

BB-8: <From Booksmart night.>

C3-PO: What???

BB-8: <Everyone was watching Booksmart so Nimi and Maddy had to babysit.>

C3-PO: And...all of you are watching the war series?

D-0: I just started!

BB-9E: <Why all the exclamation points?>

R2-D2: <he’s kind of the child of the group>

BB-9E: <ahh.>

C3-PO: Alright, this is getting out of hand. Next thing you know, you’ll be saying that the war game is actually real.

D-0: It’s not real?? Looks like it is!

BB-8: <So...>

R2-D2: <I think you should sit down for a minute.>

C3-PO: Now you’re making things up.

BB-9E: <sEaRcH yOuR fEeLiNgS rAnDoM dRoId I dOnT kNoW>

C3-PO: You’re telling me there’s actually alliances between the armies?

BB-9E: <Did BeeBee mention that Booksmart night occurred in a FO ship?>

C3-PO: ACTUALLY NO HE DID NOT

C3-PO: BB8 EXPLAIN YOURSELF

BB-8: <It wasn’t relevant information at the time.>

R2-D2: <As he proceeds to use innocent puppy eyes to attempt to deflect the blame.>

C3-PO: So assuming it’s real and you aren’t just tricking me, who’s running this thing?

C3-PO: And more importantly, who’s running the Resistance?

R2-D2: <...good question.>

BB-8: <But Poe, Rose, Gwen, Maddy, Nimi, and Armitage are running the war.>

C3-PO: You mean the Resistance is defenseless?!

D-0: That doesn’t so-sound good!

BB-9E: <To be fair, both sides are now defenseless.>

BB-8: <Both sides also seem to be addicted to this first episode.>

R2-D2: <Probably because they’re not doing the fighting for once, and Nimi explained the rules so we know no one’s gonna die. Which is a nice change.>

D-0: Agreed!

BB-9E: <Is he always this hyper?>

BB-8: <Yes but you get used to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things about this chapter:  
> I tried to mimic D-0’s speech patterns and occasional stutter, hopefully that wasn’t annoying or confusing.  
> Everything written in the symbols is translated from droid speak.  
> Nimi is releasing videos of the war like ‘episodes’, this is after ‘episode one’ is released.


	138. Poe and Arm Gotta Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Least creative title ever, I know. Please don’t kill me.

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Videographers, Rule-enforcers, and Designers

Poe: First day is coming to an end!

Rose: YES!!! WE MADE IT THROUGH THE FIRST DAY!

Nimi: All cameras are in perfect condition. Except for the ones that are falling apart.

Nimi: There seems to be an awful lot of those.

Gwen: No rules have been broken.

Arm: AND EVERYONE’S USING MY BUILDING SUPPLIES, YAY

Rose: hey so are we just gonna take shifts throughout the night or what are we doing

Gwen: SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK

Arm: Hey Poe, can you come out real quick?

Poe: Yea gimme a minute

Poe: Hux, I’m gay.

Arm: I know that. Come out to the Falcon.

Poe: Falcon, I’m gay.

Arm: can i please shoot him

Gwen: well yes but actually no

Poe: Ok I’m kidding u guys, sure I can meet u by the Falcon.

Nimi: Why?

Poe: Because he asked me to.

Nimi: I meant why are you two talking by the Falcon?

Gwen: Hey look, it rhymes!

Rose: No it doesn’t.

Rose: Talkin by the Falcon could rhyme tho.

Arm: I need to ask Poe something.

Gwen: Talking to the Falcon rhymes as well!

Maddy: Why are there two completely opposite conversations going on at the same time?

Arm: No clue, pick one and join in.

Rose: wait, how did we end up with talking to the falcon?

Arm: Poe where are you it’s pitch-black out here.

Maddy: umm...you know what I’m too tired to deal with this right now.

Maddy has left the chat

Nimi: Welp, that just happened.

** ON A PRIVATE CHAT WITH ARM AND POE **

Poe: Hey, what do you need?

Arm: So...I kind of have a question for you. And you can’t tell ANYONE.

Poe: Wait, is this like a life-or-death thing?

Arm: No, you’re just the only person I could ask.

Poe: Ok?

Arm: So...you proposed to Finn and he said yes.

Poe: I think this is pretty much common knowledge by now, but yes, yes I did.

Poe: And yes, yes he did.

Arm: So...ummm...hey, no one can hack this, right?

Poe: I don’t think so, but I can invite Rose and see if she can put up her fancy code walls.

Arm: No! Definitely do not do that.

Poe: ...ok?

Arm: I just...okay, so I want to propose to Rose. Soon. Because I’ve been preparing to, but we never meet up anymore, we’re just busy, and this is the first time we’ve been in the same room for an extended period of time, and...I don’t know!

Poe: wait you’re gonna propose to Rose?

Arm: yes

Poe: maybe wait till after the war. otherwise we’re going to have to fill in everyone in the armies in on a LOT of stuff they’ve missed, and that would just be confusing for everyone. Also because if you ask Nimi to look away from the porg and the cameras she’s set up for even one second, she’ll murder you.

Arm: Yea I kind of enjoy living-

Arm: I just don’t know if she’s still angry at me. Rose, I mean.

Poe: I don’t know. Maybe? She gives second chances very easily, unless she’s angry at someone very close to her.

Poe: I’ll get Domination Army on it. They’re all good friends with Rose.

Poe: Everyone in Girlsquad lowkey dislikes me.

Arm: Okay, thank you  😁

Poe: No problem, Hugs  😉


	139. Poe’s Mission

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited Domination Army

Poe: WAKE UP

Rey: Poe...

Ben: I wish it was possible to shoot someone from this far away.

Rey: why then we’d both be dead

Poe: Guys you don’t even know where I am.

Arashell: it’s too earlyyyyyy

Ben: Poe, the sun’s not even up.

Poe: Not true! It’s sunrise!

Rey: ...can you at least explain why you’re bothering us?

Poe: Cause I need you guys to convince Rose to stop ignoring Arm.

Arashell: She’s moved on to ignoring him?

Poe: Yes and we’re all so bored.

Poe: Except for Nimi. She seems to be extremely possessive of her cameras. Even though they’re all literally falling apart and it’s at the point where we’ve had to tape some of them back together with flex tape.

Rey: WHY FLEX TAPE  😂

Poe: Because according to Gwen and Rose, flex tape is the biggest meme in the galaxy.

Poe: Just seems like tape to me.

Ben: Why is Poe so innocent sometimes?

Poe: But anyway, back to the Rose Tico dilemma...

Ben: So we’re supposed to fight in a war and get Rose and Arm back together at the same time?

Poe: Yeah, basically.

Rey: *shrugs* we’ve done worse.

Arashell: Sounds fun.

Poe: Good. Because my next option was Chaos Army, and that means I’d have to start talking to them again.

Ben: You stopped talking to them?

Poe: Yes, because they painted my nails.

Ben: WHAT

Ben: What color?

Poe: I don’t wanna talk about it.

Rey: *whispers* neon pink

Arashell: And he hasn’t been able to wash it off.

Poe: so i’m no longer talking to them

Ben: It amazes me how long you and Zorii can fight for.

Poe: Just focus on getting Rose to stop fighting first, and then we’ll discuss that.

Rey: Aye aye, General!


	140. Reconnaissance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies to everyone for this *extemely* late chapter, I’m so so sorry, real life + some new projects + the US election = not much writing time, and my schedule got messed up for a few days.

Temiri has started a chat room

Temiri invited Oniho

Oniho: what?

Temiri: Mitaka didn’t try to kill us in our sleep.

Oniho: I noticed.

Oniho: So?

Temiri: So we can probably trust him.

Temiri: Though let’s just be cautious for today.

Oniho: Sounds like a plan to me.

******************************************************

Oniho has started a chat room

Oniho invited Temiri

Oniho invited Mitaka

Oniho: What should our plan be for today?

Mitaka: We should set up some defenses around our base.

Temiri: Let’s spy on the other bases as well, see what they’re up to.

Oniho: Ok, I just brought a blaster, what weapons does everyone else have?

Mitaka: Blaster. Standard FO-issue, set for stun.

Temiri: Training blaster, but I also have a training lightsaber.

Mitaka: Wait, training lightsabers exist?

Temiri: Rose built it.

Mitaka: Ahh.

Mitaka: I haven’t seen her lately cause she’s stopped visiting the FO  😭 we used to all hang out in Arm’s room with the cat.

Mitaka: Does anyone remember why she’s angry at Arm?

Oniho: Not really, no.

Temiri: I think she was just in a bad mood so they started arguing.

Temiri: And now they won’t stop.

Mitaka: She’ll forgive him eventually.

Mitaka: I hope.

Temiri: I think I see Domination Army.

Mitaka: That looks like them. Can you see what they’re doing?

Temiri: Just building more onto their base and chatting.

Oniho: We could launch a surprise attack?

Mitaka: No, I think Ben’s keeping a lookout. They found quadnocs.

Oniho: What about Chaos Army?

Temiri: Both armies are technically stronger than us, if we can sneak up on them it’ll give us the advantage, right?

Mitaka: Yea

Mitaka: Jannah seems to be sneaking out of their base.

Mitaka: Uhh.... Guys, we might want to head back to our base before she gets there first.

Oniho: I can start setting up traps?

Temiri: LESS TALKING MORE RUNNING

Temiri: SHE’S GONNA GET THERE FIRST

Mitaka: I THINK SHE CAN SEE US

Mitaka: SHOOT HER

Oniho: I THINK I GOT HER

Temiri: let’s just protect our base for now


	141. Medics and Spray Paint

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah: I REQUIRE MEDICAL ASSISTANCE

Jannah: oh wait i forgot to add Kay and Z. How nice.

Jannah invited Chaos Army

Kaydel: You really just forgot to add us to the chat.

Jannah: yep

Kaydel: Good job.

Zorii: What medical assistance do you require?

Jannah: I got shot by a child.

Zorii: JHJAFKDKJDFSKJSDFFKFDF JANNAH I TOLD YOU NOT TO CHASE THEM

Jannah: I DON’T CARE

Zorii: YOU IDIOTTTTTTTTT

Jannah: wow thanks thats the nicest compliment ive gotten this month

Kaydel:

Kaydel: on a completely unrelated note, please tell me the location of the other compliment-givers right now

Jannah: I mean at least we know where Mitaka and the kids are hiding out.

Kaydel: I don’t think the others know where they are, so that gives us some sort of advantage.

Zorii: *shoves bandages in Jannah’s direction* IT WAS STILL A TERRIBLE IDEA

Jannah: I KNOW IT WAS

Zorii: THEN WHY DID YOU DO IT

Jannah: BECAUSE

Kaydel: Jannah go to your room.

Zorii: AHAHAHAHA-

Kaydel: Zorii, you also go to your room.

Zorii: oh

Jannah: AFSDHDSFHJDSFKJDAFSKJ KAYDEL

Kaydel: Why do you guys keep spamming your keyboards?

Jannah: I dunno, it’s fun.

Zorii: Try it!

Kaydel: ahdfhjfdsjdfshjksdff

Jannah: Beautiful.

Kaydel: You guys are both un-grounded, this is amazing.

Kaydel: ahjfdkjdfskjdfskhadfs

Jannah: she’s going to do this all day, isn’t she?

Zorii: Probably.

Jannah: can you pass the bacta patches?

Zorii: Sure. U need help?

Jannah: I don’t think so.

Zorii: Mk. I’m gonna go spy on Reylo and their child.

Jannah: *spits water* WAIT WE’RE REFERRING TO THEM AS REYLO NOW THAT’S ADORABLE

Jannah: THE SECOND WE GET BACK, I’M GETTING THE SPRAY PAINT OUT AGAIN

Kaydel: Omigod remember you used to spray paint Stormpilot on Poe’s X-wing every day and he’d have to fly it on missions and it would have the word Stormpilot on it with big pink hearts-

Jannah: Do you think I’ll die if I spray paint Reylo onto the Falcon?

Zorii: Probably. That ship’s one of a kind.

Zorii: But you could totally get away with painting it on a TIE fighter.

Jannah: WAIT DO WE HAVE FABRIC PAINT AT THE BASE

Kaydel: That exists?

Jannah: WE SHALL MAKE IT EXIST

Kaydel: I like where this is going.

Jannah: Anyway, back to actual work...

Zorii: I’ll watch the others.

Kaydel: I’ll try to sort through our supplies.

Jannah: I’m just gonna finish bandaging my arm but then I can help with either one of those.


	142. We need to build a wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I DO NOT MEAN TO OFFEND ANYONE WITH THIS TITLE. IT’S MEANT TO MAINLY BE A JOKE ABOUT THE CHAPTER, PLEASE DON’T MAKE THIS POLITICAL.

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Arashell

Rey invited Ben

Ben: So now we’re supposed to get Arm and Rose back together AND win a war in the middle of a war?

Arashell: Sounds right.

Rey: You left out the part where we gotta keep all of this a secret.

Ben: Oh yea that too.

Arashell: Not hard at all.

Ben: Definitely...

Rey: So any plans for...any of those?

Ben: Immediately burn any videos of this and avoid meeting up for a few weeks afterward.

Rey: you know that one was actually the least of out worries but ok-

Ben: Well how hard can getting Rose to stop being angry Arm be?

Rey: think about what you just said.

Ben: I mean-

Rey: THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU JUST SAID

Ben: True.

Arashell: I don’t think they’re fighting any more.

Rey: They don’t seem to be. She just doesn’t want to talk to him for some reason.

Ben: I will never understand women.

Arashell: Same.

  
Rey: Same.

Ben: What

Arashell: What

Ben: What

Rey: W h a t

Ben: w h y

Rey: b e c a u s e

Ben: o k a y

Rey: What if we built a wall around our base?

Arashell: WITH A DOOR THIS TIME

Rey: yes

Ben: Do we have supplies to build a wall?

Rey: I dunno if it’s enough for a whole wall, but we do have a whole pile of random supplies over there.

Arashell: What about these big metal things?

Arashell: The ones that were probably walls at some point?

Rey: I’m concerned.

Rey: We really need to talk to Hux after this.

Ben: Definitely. Until then...let’s get started?

Ben: I don’t know about you guys, but I want to put off the whole Rose and Arm thing for as long as possible.

Arashell: Yes I like living.

Rey: Definitely. I do not want to be on the receiving end of the wrath of Rose Tico.

Rey: or hux i guess but rose is scarier


	143. Rose and Armitage, Sitting In A Tree...

Ben has started a chat room

  
Ben invited Rey and Arashell

Arashell invited Rose

Rose: Hi? Why me?

Rey: Because we wanted to know why you and Arm have been fighting for so long now.

Rose: Well he won’t apologize to me so I’m not apologizing to him.

Ben: yes but why does anyone need to apologize in the first place

Rose: Because.

Rey: *sighs* Alright...I really hate to do this but you’ve forced our hands.

Rose: ?

Arashell: Why?

Rose: Why what?

Arashell: Are you and Arm fighting?

Rose: I just said, it’s because he won’t apologize.

Arashell: Why does he have to apologize?

Rose: because

Arashell: Because why?

Rose: Because.

Arashell: Because why?

Rose: BECAUSE OK

Arashell: why?

Rose: I DONT KNOW, IT WAS SOMETHING IMPORTANT

Rey: Wait...

Ben: ...you forgot why you’re arguing?

Rose: Ask Hux!

Rey: well that’s not good

Rey: they’re not even on a first-name basis any more.

Ben: I mean at least they’re still talking.

Rey: HEY I APOLOGIZED FOR THAT A YEAR AGO OK

Ben: I’m just saying...

Rey: stop.

Ben: make me

Rey: fine

Rose: WHATS SHE DOING

Arashell: cuddling

Ben: We definitely don’t need another couple fighting right now.

Rose: Ben and Rey, sitting in a tree...constantly trying to murder each other.

Rey: Rose and Armitage, sitting in a tree...

Rose: until I push Hux out of the tree

Rey: oh

Arashell: 😶

Ben: can we go back to the part where you don’t even remember why you’re fighting?

Rose: Because he was being annoying and he stopped responding to my calls and missed all of our meetings.

Arashell: Ooh, she remembered!

Rey: Sadly enough there’s a reason for that but if I tell you I’d have to kill you, which would really put a damper on the whole thing.

Rose: Waht?

Rey: Waht?

Ben: Wow and I thought the FO was terrifying.

Ben: So I think we can all agree that you need to stop being angry at Arm?

Arashell: Mhmm.

Ben: You’ll be good friends for an hour and then hate each other for two weeks. It’s confusing.

Rose: I’ll try to be nice.

Rose: but he gotta promise not to miss like twelve of our meetings in a row and then not say anything about it.

Rey: I mean that seems fair.

Ben: But you have to be the one to tell him that.

Rose: ...deal.

Arashell: oh good it was getting annoying, you two fighting


	144. Sustenance

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited CHAOS BRINGERS

Zorii: ooh i like that name

Jannah: same lol

Jannah: Anyway...

Jannah: WE NEED SUSTENANCE!

Kaydel: SUStenance?

Jannah: I wanna go find food.

Jannah: Am hungry.

Kaydel: flkjjdfdlkjdskljslk fine go find food

Jannah: BUT I DON’T WANNA GO BY MYSELF

Zorii: Jannah you’re like 20-something.

Jannah: I’m 20-something and admittedly afraid of the dark, ok?

Kaydel: It’s the middle of the afternoon?

Jannah: I’m also afraid of being alone.

Jannah: And sometimes the ocean because I watched people drown on Kef Bir.

Jannah: The list is longer than that but I’ll stop there, it gets kind of embarrassing.

Kaydel: We’re all pretty messed up, aren’t we?

Kaydel: I mean...Rose is best friends with the person who ordered her execution.

Kaydel: Rey and Ben can speak to each other with their minds, and nobody questions that.

Kaydel: Zorii watched her home planet blow up.

Kaydel: Arm is a First Order general and a murderer who owns a cat and cries while watching The Lion King.

Kaydel: And all of us have a list of fears longer than the Jedi texts.

Kaydel: So don’t be embarrassed about being scared of the dark  💚

Jannah: That was really beautiful, and I really don’t want to ruin it, but can we go find food because I’m really hungry.

Jannah: Sorry.

Kaydel: Oh yea of course.

Zorii: I’ll come, I was just checking my weapons stash.

Kaydel: Wait, how many weapons did you bring?

Zorii: A few throwing knives, a blaster, some other stuff, you know. The usual. Well, less than the usual obviously. Poe told me I couldn’t bring all my typical weapons.

Kaydel: ...no comment.

Kaydel: I can stay back to defend the base.

Jannah: Alright. See you later.

Kaydel: Don’t get lost. And both of you better come back in one piece!

Zorii: We’ll try, love  😘💜

Kaydel: Good  😘 see you soon.

Jannah: See you soon!

Zorii: What she said :)


	145. Nimi’s Video

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, uh, asking for a friend...how many souls would a gal have to sell for a Stormpilot series? Like, where they put the galaxy back together, together? Also: how many souls for a Jannah and/or Rose series? Because TROS had so little of them both...😭  
> But of course this is PURELY HYPOTHETICAL 🤗🤥

Rose has started a chat room

Rose invited BACKSTAGE PEEPLES

Rose: i was getting tired of typing out that huge name we used to have.

Poe: But it sounds more professional.

Gwen: Backstage workers sounds professional.

Poe: Yes but she named us Backstage...Peeples.

Gwen: Yes, and?

Rose: I just wanted to say that I’m not angry at Hux anymore.

Rose: Sorry for ignoring you.

Arm: Sorry for ignoring YOU.

Rose: you better be

Gwen: NOPE

Nimi: Guys as fun as this is, I’m actually kind of bored. And tired.

Gwen: U want cat?

Nimi: No I have to watch Jessika, remember?

Gwen: We can trade?

Nimi: Sure.

Finn: I mean we could play a game but like...I didn’t bring any games.

Maddy: Neither did I.

Poe: Same.

Rose: So no games :(

Finn: Let’s make a video!

Poe: Sure, why not!

Nimi: Lol can I add it to the videos of the war?

Poe: I repeat: Sure, why not!

Nimi: Ight.

Nimi: Hiya, this is a video log. I’m Nimi Chireen, and we’re at the headquarters of our little control room here with my friends.

Gwen: I mean it’s basically a First Order transport and the Falcon, but I guess we could call it our headquarters.

Nimi: That’s Captain Gwen Phasma of the First Order, and right now she’s hugging the world’s cutest cat, and her name is...

Rose: ???

Nimi: Guys that’s your cue to say her name.

Gwen: But we already know her name.

Nimi: Yes but just say it so we can show this to our kids in something or other years.

Maddy: Or Arm and Rose’s kid.

Rose: What?

Maddy: What?

Nimi: Will someone please just tell us the cat’s name?

Arm: Her name is Millicent, and we all love her dearly. Except I love her more than all of you because she is my cat.

Arm: I’m General Armitage Hux, by the way, if Nimi says we have to say our names.

Nimi: Thx.

Poe: And we’re all here because of the war! The fake one. And the real one. It’s really confusing. I’m Poe Dameron. Lol this feels so weird.

Finn: We’re just the behind the scenes people. And I’m Finn Dameron. You’re right, this does feel weird.

Maddy: Hi I’m bored. I mean my name is Maddy, but I’m also very bored. My name’s definitely not bored.

Rose: We’re terrible at this video-making thing, aren’t we? This is Rose Tico.

Rose: We need to show the others this, after this is done. We probably sound so cringy.

Nimi: Probably.

Nimi: So to anyone watching this who’s not related to us, we’re at war while at war, and we’re all besties.

Nimi: And we have a cat and a porg and that’s about as much responsibility as most of us can handle.

Arm: And three children but none of them are related to us.

Gwen: And about half of us have died, but we’re still here.

Rose: I miss five minutes ago when I didn’t think about these things.

Gwen: It really never registered to you that half of us have died?

Rose: I mean I’m not the one who got thrown down a trash compactor.

Gwen: It was quite nice, actually. Very peaceful.

Nimi: I swear we’re not as insane as that discussion made us seem.

Poe: I’m 100% sure that we are.

Finn: Also if we’re still going, I’ve gotten my butt kicked by over half of the women in our group. And all of the guys.

Poe: Yea you’re a really bad ladies man.

Finn: its not my fault rose was flirting with me when i was in love with you

Rose: Yes but it was your fault that you got electrocuted.

Finn: BUT TO BE FAIR YOU WOULDN’T HAVE MET YOUR BOYFRIEND IF I HADN’T TRIED TO DESERT THE RESISTANCE

Arm: Ok fair.

Finn: Also Temiri and Arashell and Oniho would not be here.

Finn: And Phasma.

Finn: And me and Poe.

Gwen: Well kriff.

Nimi: I’m ending this video before it can go any further downhill.

Poe: We’re just stating facts.

Nimi: Yes and it’s concerning that Rose electrocuting Finn led to you and Finn getting married and Rey basically adopting three kids and Rose and Arm dating.

Rose: Well when you put it that way-


	146. Meilooruns

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited CHAOS BRINGERS

Zorii: We have returned with sustenance!

Kaydel: ooh yum

Jannah: I’M SO HAPPY, I FOUND MEILOORUNS

Zorii: She literally has not shut up about them.

Jannah: Imma eat one.

Kaydel: Why?

Jannah: Because my stomach sounds like an angry tooka cat.

Zorii: IT DOES THO

Zorii: EXACTLY like an angry tooka!

Kaydel: May I ask why you know what they sound like-

Zorii: Ok so weird spice runner story.

Zorii: I was like sixteen.

Zorii: We had to ship some cargo.

Zorii: Only the cargo was tooka cats.

Zorii: And there was one of them that was very clear about how much it disliked me.

Zorii: So that happened.

Kaydel: Does this have anything to do with that really long scar on your right leg?

Zorii: which one i have a lot of scars

Zorii: people shoot me very often

Kaydel: The one on your right leg that’s like a couple inches above the back of your knee and it’s really long and visible.

Zorii: Maybe  😅

Kaydel: I THOUGHT YOU’D BEEN STABBED OR SOMETHING

Zorii: I mean technically I was-

Kaydel BUT IT WAS A CAT

Kaydel: I’M DEAD  😂😂😂

Jannah: I have not seen this scar.

  
Jannah: But grumpy-teenager-Zorii fighting a smol cat and losing is a very funny picture.

Zorii: Excuse me I did not ask to be called out like this.

Zorii: Jannah I’m eating your meiloorun.

Jannah: WHAT DID I DO

Zorii: You encouraged her to do this.

Jannah: I’M INNOCENT

Zorii: I- no you’re not-

Jannah: Ok I’m not innocent, no, BUT WHEN IT COMES TO THIS I AM

Zorii: Fine.

Zorii: Kaydel I’m stealing your blanket tonight.

Kaydel: I don’t have a blanket.

Zorii: Wait what were you sleeping under

Kaydel: I dunno I found this big tarp thingy, I think it’s a broken camo net.

Jannah: A what now?

Kaydel: one of those big things people use to hide their ships.

Zorii: oh

Jannah: I’m worried.

Jannah: Where did Arm find all this stuff again?


	147. More Droids...and a betting pool?

BB-8 has started a chat room

BB-8 invited Droid Pals

BB-8: <Alright, it’s been a day and you’ve all seen the first episode...place your bets.>

C3-PO: I refuse to bet on this madness!

BB-9E: <Well I don’t, so...are we actually betting or is it just for fun?>

BB-8: <I don’t really have anything of value to bet.>

BB-9E: <Same here.>

R2-D2: <I mean...I have access to some old chat logs between Han Solo and a Leia Organa and Luke Skywalker... 😏 >

C3-PO: Those don’t need to see the light of day.

BB-9E: <ahh yes. I have some chats between...Armitage Hux and Rose Tico...and a few between Rey and Ben Solo but they seem to use other forms of communication more often than texting.>

BB-8: <I have quite a few between Poe and Finn that I wish I did not. D-0?>

D-0: <I have access to some chat logs...but they’re just Resistance missions.>

BB-8: <So place your bets and whoever loses has to give up one of their chat logs  😏 .>

C3-PO: I do not condone with this-

R2-D2: <Tell us something we don’t already know.>

C3-PO: You all are very irresponsible.

R2-D2: <I said something we don’t know->

BB-9E: <well I think Mitaka’s team will win, obviously. They are by far superior.>

D-0: Can we wa-watch the new ep-episode?

BB-8: <Ooh, is it out yet?>

D-0: Nimi C-Chireen is videoing it li-live right now!

BB-9E: <ooh, Mitaka’s team’s building defenses and scouting. The proper tactical decision.>

BB-8: <Well Zorii and Jannah are finding food while Kaydel spies on the others!>

BB-9E: <Well Jannah got shot by Mitaka’s teammates.>

R2-D2: <Well Rey and Ben and Arashell are building a wall. And stopping Rose from fighting Arm.>

BB-8: <They were fighting?>

R2-D2: <Apparently.>

D-0: I want Mi-Mitaka’s team to win!

D-0: Actually, Kaydel’s!

D-0: No, Ben’s!

BB-9E: <...Why I don’t join the Resistance: Exhibit A.>


	148. Plan of Attack

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for all these late chapters.  
> Life really looked at my writing schedule and said NOPE.

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Ben and Arashell

Rey: So I don’t know if you guys have noticed.

Rey: but no one is doing anything

Ben: I think Zorii and Jannah went into the forest area for a while, but they came back with food a few minutes ago.

Ben: I haven’t seen Oniho or Temiri or Mitaka

Arashell: Should we add anything to the wall?

Rey: Idk sure

Rey: Any ideas?

Arashell: Not really.

Ben: Should we attack someone…?

Ben: I don’t even know the rules.

Rey: I don’t even know if there are rules.

Arashell: Gwen didn’t tell anyone what they are.

Ben: Well then there’s only one thing we can do.

Arashell: Mhmm.

Rey: Yep.

Rey: Mitaka’s team or Kaydel’s team?

Arashell: Mitaka’s.

Ben: Mitaka’s it is.

Rey: Avengers. Assemble.

Ben: no

Rey: ok.

Rey: Avengers. Disassemble.

Ben: i swear you spend more time in FO ships than at the Resistance base

Rey: You’re probably not wrong.

Ben: and most of that time you spend in the FO is you and Gwen messing around while also being productive

Rey: look why are you bringing this up now

Ben: because you guys watched avengers without me and it’s not cool 😢

Rey: i thought we were past that

Ben: yes but then you had to go and quote the movie

Ben: Anyway, has anyone actually seen Mitaka’s team?

Arashell: I think I saw them chasing Jannah a few hours ago.

Rey: Should we just attack them or should we spy on them for a while and launch a surprise attack?

Ben: Let’s take the one that involves not getting shot.

Ben: Because while I understand that no one will actually be harmed and all blasters are set to stun but getting shot hurts. A lot.

Arashell: Yea Temiri shot me once.

Rey: ????

Arashell: We were practicing with training blasters.

Rey: ahh.

Ben: So...should we go find out where they’re camped or something I’M SORRY THIS FEELS SO WEIRD

Rey: yea i feel really weird for attacking our friends and then I remember OH WAIT THAT’S WHAT WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING 90% OF THE TIME


	149. Strategizing

Mitaka has started a chat room

Mitaka invited Oniho

Mitaka invited Temiri

Mitaka: Guys Ben and Rey and Arashell are trying to sneak up on us.

Oniho: From where?

Mitaka: They’re hiding in those bushes over there-ish.

Mitaka: The green ones.

Temiri: Those?

Mitaka: No, the other green ones.

Temiri: Those?

Mitaka: No, the ones I’m pointing at while trying to look like I’m not pointing at them.

Temiri: Those?

Mitaka: Still no.

Temiri: They’re all green!

Mitaka: yes but there’s really no other defining feature of the bushes.

Oniho: I’ll go get our blasters.

Temiri: Guys Rey’s climbing a tree what do I do?

Temiri: I think she’s trying to jump into our base.

Mitaka: She can’t to that!

Oniho: Shoot her...or something!

Temiri: You’re the one with the blaster!

Oniho: oh yea

Mitaka: Wait did you get her?

Oniho: no but that’s the second time I’ve shot someone in the arm today.

Temiri: Wait who’d you hit? I still can’t see any of them.

Oniho: o i think i hit Ben

Mitaka: Mk well it’s better than hitting one of the trees.

Mitaka: ok no its not but-

Temiri: She’s still climbing the tree.

Oniho: I can shoot her!

Temiri: NO you’re gonna hit one of us probably

Temiri: I can try but I still can’t really see anyone.

Mitaka: Idk but in the FO, shooting repeatedly at the target seems to work.

Mitaka: occasionally.

Mitaka: nvm it really doesn’t work

Temiri: Let’s try it anyway.

Oniho: ooh it’s working

Temiri: I can see them now!

Temiri: o it’s because they’re running away. Did we get anyone?

Mitaka: Idk, I can’t see them anymore.

Mitaka: That was one of the downsides to that strategy.

Mitaka: And also why the Resistance keeps winning.

Mitaka: Well at least I’m learning more about battle strategy here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But seriously: the only battle plan stormtroopers seem to have is ‘run at the enemy and shoot them repeatedly with large and powerful weapons’, and while I understand that, meanwhile the Resistance is launching these sneak attacks and planting spies in the FO and playing smart to stay alive.


	150. Concerned Fighting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy IFD everyone!!! And as always, may the Force be with you!

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Ben and Arashell

Rey: Areyouokayomigoddidtheyhityouareyoubleedingiseeblooddowehaveabandagesomewhere-

Ben: …

Ben: I mean it’s nice to know someone is concerned, but are you good?

Rey: There is blood everywhere.

Rey: So no. Not really.

Ben: its really not that bad

Arashell: It looks bad?

Ben: It’s fine. He missed.

Arashell: Why’s your arm bleeding if he missed?

Ben:

Ben: ok so

Ben: on a completely different note, did you hit any of them?

Rey: ...no. You got shot and I panicked and I forgot about the plan and...stuff.

Rey: Arashell, do we have bandages somewhere? I can’t find any, but I remember grabbing some from Zorii.

Arashell: They’re over by where we put our weapons last night.

Ben: I think we moved them over by the books-

Rey: You sit down. 

Ben: Rey, seriously, I’m fine.

Rey: You’re still bleeding. A lot.

Arashell: Are these the bandages?

Rey: no and i have no idea what those are, but they work

Arashell: ok 😂

Rey: Sit still!

Ben: I’m fine! You shouldn’t waste those!

Rey: I’m not wasting them!

Rose: hey Arashell the camera broke, are they angry fighting or concerned fighting?

Arashell: Concerned fighting.

Rey: Rose what are you doing here?

Rose: Most of the cameras are literally falling apart. We were watching u guys, but then the camera broke, so we only have audio. I’m trying to figure out whether or not you guys are actually angry at each other.

Ben: No.

Rey: Nope.

Rose: Ok thx u guys, I think the camera’s fixed.

Rose: Bye!

Rose left the chat

Rey: Ok that was weird

Arashell: Mhmm.

Arashell: Where did they even find cameras?

Ben: I think Poe had a couple, they were his neighbor’s or something like that. From back when he lived on Yavin.

Arashell: Ohhhh I thought he stole them or something.

Ben: No, that’s Hux and Zorii. They’re the thieves. Poe’s the one who makes ‘your mom’ jokes and stuff.

Rey: For the millionth time, sit still!

Ben: I was!

Rey: Not when you were talking about Poe and Hux and Zorii.

Ben: ...true,

Rey: I’m almost done.

Ben: I can take care of it-

Rey: NO.

Rey: For the millionth time.

Ben: ...as I was saying, Poe isn’t the thief in the group.

Arashell: I thought Hux was the spy.

Ben: Oh yea

Ben: Well then who’s the other thief, cause I know there’s two.

Arashell: Phasma.

Ben: Definitely Phasma.


	151. The purpose of this chat is to have no purpose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies again for the continuously late chapters, life has been sucking the energy out of me lately and it’s been hard trying to find ways to fit comedy and strategy together.

Poe has started a chat room

Poe invited “Backstage Peeples”

Poe: I don’t like it. I don't agree with it. But I accept it.

Poe: Reluctantly.

Rose: Lol

Rose: So...what is the purpose of this chat.

Poe: The purpose of this chat is to have no purpose.

Gwen: Which would then mean it is fulfilling its purpose.

Arm: Can’t argue with logic.

Arm: Even if I only understood about half of that.

Nimi: So what did you guys think of the movie we watched?

Nimi: The Rise of Skywalker thing?

Rose: boriiiiiiinnnnngggggg, where was Millicent? And me?

Rose: But mainly Millicent?

Finn: why does rose care more about the cat than herself

Rose: Because the idea of watching someone who was literally pretending to be me for two hours straight is kinda creepy.

Rose: Even though the lady doing it was actually really good I wanna go find her and give her a hug or something.

Finn: I’m pretty sure you’d scare her off.

Rose: And she can join Girlsquad! I mean if she wants to lol

Poe: ok this got weird

Maddy: What did you expect?

Poe: Great question.

Poe: And tbh I liked the movie only now I’m in trouble for setting the Falcon on fire.

Finn: Yea but to be fair you deserve it.

Arm: Wait, are you guys fighting now?

Poe: No he’s just annoyed that I didn’t tell him about being a Spice Runner.

Poe: Hey Finn, to be fair, you wouldn’t tell me what you were gonna tell Rey before we all drowned for OVER A YEAR.

Finn: ok so you see

Nimi: So...this is entertaining and all...but it’s really not.

Nimi: I’ve had enough of fighting to last a lifetime.

Rose: Yeah, same :(

Arm: More than enough.

Gwen: So no fighting. Even though we’re literally in the middle of a war in the middle of ANOTHER war.

Poe: Yea but after this… maybe we should talk about a peace treaty or something.

Arm: I...feel like we should have thought of this a long time ago.

Poe: Yea same.

Arm: I like it. We could start a new government.

Rose: THE NEW NEW REPUBLIC

Arm: And we should definitely not put Rose in charge of naming it.

Rose: I’M JUST CALLING IT WHAT IT IS

Finn: is she wrong though...not really.

Poe: I can ask Ben about it.

Gwen: Bad idea.

Poe: ??? I’m pretty sure he’d be up for putting together a peace treaty.

Gwen: Yes

Gwen: But

Gwen: Currently our leader is fighting with your Jedi.

Rose: *facepalms* AGAIN

Rose: WHAT NOW

Gwen: They’re arguing about force healing.

Poe: *insert disappointed sigh*

Poe: Angry fighting or concerned fighting?

Gwen: Poe, you know I don’t know the difference.

Nimi: Idk the cameras are just picking up audio, I’m still trying to fix the video recording part.

Nimi: We need to find some cameras that aren’t from the Clone Wars.

Arm: Let’s just all cross our fingers and assume it’s concerned fighting.

Arm: I have absolutely zero motivation right now.

Arm: Aside from keeping this thing running.

Arm: And my cat.

Nimi: Can I hold her? 🥺

Arm: Noooooo you have a porg

Nimi: Please?

Arm: Later.

Nimi: Mk.

Nimi: It’s later now.

Arm: is this what poe has to deal with all the time

Poe: No, Nimi only does this when it comes to cats.

Poe: But for pretty much everyone else, yes. All. The. Time.


	152. Sunset

Jannah has started a chat room

Jannah invited CHAOS BRINGERS

Jannah: The sun’s setting.

Kaydel: Wait, really?

Kaydel: oh

Kaydel: Where did today go?

Jannah: I honestly don’t know.

Zorii: I mean we did get those meilooruns.

Zorii: And we plotted a lot.

Zorii: Like, a lot a lot.

Zorii: Mainly about explosives. That was nice.

Kaydel: Ahh yes, I forgot about that.

Kaydel: That was very nice.

Jannah: Tomorrow we should actually use those plans.

Jannah: And those explosives.

Zorii: Well they’re almost done.

Kaydel: Where did you even learn how to make explosives out of meilooruns?

Zorii: I literally just made it up as I went.

Kaydel:

Kaydel: We’re gonna die.

Zorii: Some of my best friends have died, doesn’t change much.

Jannah: we’re so dead

Kaydel: Look Zorii I don’t want the cause of my death to be an exploding fruit.

Kaydel: I wanna die of old age. Or while taking down illegal pirates and/or more evil FO people. Something like that.

Kaydel: Not because of a fruit bomb.

Jannah: Fruit bomb. That’s something I never thought I’d say.

Kaydel: To be completely fair, you haven’t said it out loud yet.

Jannah: *immediately says it*

Zorii: LOL KAYDEL YOUR FACEEEEEEE

Kaydel: I did not ask to be called out like this.

Zorii: you basically asked for it right after you told Jannah she hadn’t said fruit bomb out loud.

Jannah: GUYS

Kaydel: WHAT

Jannah: THE SUN LOOKS LIKE A FRUIT BOMB

Zorii: WHY

Jannah: I DON’T KNOW

Zorii: AND NO IT REALLY DOESN’T

Jannah: IT’S ROUND AND HAS COLORS

Zorii: FINE

Jannah: FINE

Kaydel: It’s pretty.

Zorii: The fruit bomb or the sunset?

Kaydel: Both, but the sunset more than the fruit bomb.

Zorii: Reasonable.

Jannah: I wonder how Nimi’s doing.

Jannah: With her illegal broadcast, I mean.

Kaydel: Meh. I doubt anyone’s actually watching this.

Zorii: Idk I’d watch it if I was bored enough.

Zorii: And seeing as how the war has basically come to a complete stop, a good portion of the Resistance and First Order are probably bored enough.

Jannah: Oh kriff, when we get back they’re gonna freak out.

Zorii: Probably, yes.

Zorii: Though not as much as Poe when he figures out what we did.

Kaydel: You guys really had to ruin a perfectly nice sunset, didn’t you?


	153. Starlight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To anybody still reading this: I’M SO SORRY THIS CHAPTER WAS SO LATE! Result of trying to start too many new projects all at once and a lack of motivation; working on keeping these chapters on schedule.

Rey has started a chat room

Rey invited Ben and Arashell

Rey: How is today already over?

Ben: It’s already sunset?

Rey: Mhmm.

Arashell: Good, I’m tiredddddd 😴

Arashell: I don’t even know why.

Rey: 😂 same here

Ben: Where did today even go?

Rey: Well you got shot.

Ben: Yes, you keep reminding me-

Rey: fine sorry I’ll stop for now.

Ben: Everyone comfortable?

Rey: Yea

Arashell: Ya

Arashell: Can you tell a story tonight? You haven’t done one in a week 🥺

Rey: How about tomorrow? I can’t even keep my eyes open right now.

Arashell: Mkay...but can you tell one about Queen Amidala?

Rey: Of course 💙

Ben: You guys do stories?

Arashell: On the Falcon.

Arashell: Unless Poe’s using the Falcon. Then it’s in our room.

Ben: That sounds...really nice.

Arashell: It’s fun!

Rey: It is.

Rey: Maybe you could join us sometime.

Ben: Maybe…

Arashell: Guys?

Rey: Yea

Ben: What is it?

Arashell: Do I have to called you Rey and Ben?

Rey: I…? Can you explain that a little more?

Ben: I guess not?

Arashell: Mk

Arashell: Gnight Mama, ‘night Papa.

Arashell has left the chat

Rey: ...oh

Rey: wow 😭

Ben: yea

Ben: I…

Ben: I mean…

Rey: ...I wish 😔

Ben: Actually...I forgot to tell you, but...Poe and I were talking. And…

Ben: We were discussing a possible truce after this is all over. Between the Resistance and the First Order.

Rey: That sounds really nice.

Ben: And you know, the war would be over. And Poe and Finn would probably be busy helping to set up the new government.

Rey: Yea?

Ben: And...I mean they wouldn’t really have time to take care of three kids, right?

Rey: So you’re saying that…

Ben: I mean...maybe we could. We could find somewhere peaceful. And...maybe they could come with us.

Rey: If they wanted to… they deserve a childhood. And a home. And to live somewhere other than a freighter. And...be a part of a family.

Rey: If they wanted to. I really don’t think...I doubt they’d want to.

Ben: You’re doing that thing where you feel insecure and doubt yourself again.

Rey: I’m being serious!

Ben: As am I.

Ben: You’d at least consider it?

Rey: Of course 🤣

Rey: Oops sorry wrong one, I’m so tired lol. I meant this one: 🙂

Ben: Nice xD

Rey: Stopppppp

Ben: Fine.

Ben: The stars are beautiful tonight.

Rey: Yea…they really are.

Ben: You know who else is beautiful?

Rey: Mhmm.

Ben: wait what

Rey: You 💙

Ben: I- oh 🥰

Rey: Love you.

Ben: I know.

Rey: Ben! 🙄😂

Ben: Alright, alright. I love you too.

Rey: ‘night.

Ben: See you tomorrow.

Rey has left the chat

Ben has left the chat


End file.
